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Emotions can bite me


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Bad days happen.

 

I get that.

 

Stress doesn't help but hey adulthood or whatever they claim is adulthood anymore.

 

I didn't used to have panic attacks that lasted all day, and dealing with an attack while at work nearly got me today. I didn't know what I would have done if I had 'let it out' at work because I don't want to put my co-workers or customers through it, let alone let it affect my work. But it did. I over analyzed everything or I forgot the most basic things and while I eventually did get it hammered out I was already thirty minutes after closing. I didn't freak out the whole day, outwardly at least. I managed to keep it all in until I clocked out and got in the car. Then I proceeded to bawl/freak out the entire car ride home.

 

I'm still kind of in that tense panicked air but it's getting better.

 

The thing is trying to figure out where and how to find a therapist that I can afford is turning into a mess and a half.

 

PTSD, stress, depression, anxiety along with widowhood...

 

How people work full time jobs juggling these is a mystery I want to crack.

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KMO, it may have taken longer to hammer out but hey girl, give yourself some credit, you did hammer it out!! Way to go! So what if you broke down in the car!! Good for you for letting it out because holding it all in is even worse.  You're doing better than you think! I know, everything is so different now and we have/had to learn about our new selves, that's how it felt for me anyway. 

Hugs to you.

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