Hi There SoVerySad,
Sorry to hear that your date was sick and you couldn't meet. All that build up, and now you have to wait--but, I think that it is good you have been talking beforehand a good bit. I think that is better, though, you never really know if the chemistry will be there until you meet, and even then, it may not reveal itself at first few dates.
I have been navigating this dating scene on and off for the past year. It's been 2 yr4mos since my DH's passing, and "dabbling" in the dating scene has been helping me in my healing journey. I had my first encounter being intimate with another man since Jim (DH), and it was sweet. However, it caused many days of processing and sadness, and I came to the conclusion that I wasn't ready to commit emotionally to a relationship or really don't have the time right now to pay attention to this. He wanted to go a lot faster than I was ready for. I realized that I finally got to a place of peace that was working for me, and that doesn't include an intense relationship right now. I am in my comfort zone, and know that I am still working on rebuilding me. Part of me is back, but part is forever changed.
I don't regret my encounter with this new man, but I did end it, and that is always awkward and not a feel good. However, it was important and very helpful in turning a corner in this grief journey. I guess what I am trying to convey, is go slow, don't let anyway push you beyond what you are capable of giving at the present moment. You are in charge, and if he is worthy and has genuine feelings for you, he will understand. I wish you all the best in navigating this new world of dating.