2 Year Anniversary One Week Away... What to do?

[CHM1988]

The title says it all. In one week, it will mark 2 years since my partner was killed in a bicycle accident. I've heard a few people say the second year as harder. While I'd be silly not to acknowledge all the great things and people that have come into my life over this last year, I can still relate to that. There was a tenderness in the first year that I don't feel as much anymore. Now I feel more anger, and things are more complicated.

 

I have been practicing a lot of avoidance but I know I should make some kind of plan for the 18th, even if I don't keep it. My instinct is to do something alone but I don't quite know what. Maybe get a nice dinner, walk around Central Park, or take a train north and have a little day trip.

 

What did you all do on the 2-year mark?

[Wheelerswife]

I had moved before the second anniversary of my first husband's death, and although I sometimes find it hard to believe, I was remarried to a wonderful man by the time the second anniversary of my first husband's death rolled around.  I flew back to the east coast to see my first husband's family, visit his grave and see some of my widow friends. 

 

The second anniversary of my second husband's death is 2 months from today.  I find it hard to believe that he has been gone that long.  I haven't started dating yet, although I think about it.  It has taken me much longer to get to this somewhat more stable state.  Still, I have a feeling I will spend the day alone and probably in tears.  I hate that my life was upended and my heart was torn out again, but the realist in me knows John is gone and I have to figure out how to live more fully again. 

 

I think we all need to figure out what will work best for ourselves on days like anniversaries, birthdays, death dates.  Heck, I approach the dates for my 2 guys in different ways and I'm the common factor here!

 

Hugs to you,

 

Maureen