Tweety76

I had bunny name Sulo (graceful in Finnish) when I met my DH. Gave him up for a better home 2 years in to the relationship. 1,5 years after DH passed I adopted my friend's 15yo catqueen who then passed away 6 months later (British shorthair/Persian mix). Loved her to death. 2 months later I became the proud mom of 2 white Persian boys: Milton and Tigger. So here we are the three of us :) I wouldn't change a day with the boys! I wish I knew how to post a pic of my babies here :) but trust me, they are fantastic! (plus I ended up fullfilling my childhood dream 200% when I got them :D I didn't remember but I had wished to have a white Persian and now I've had 2 for 2+ years)

I haven't posted much in recent years. Some of you may remember me, some may not. To those, not, sorry you are here. This year hasn't been easy for me. Dad nearly died twice but is still here. What was hard for me to see was mom's anguish while being a nearly widowed. I coudn't say anything as it's too much I know.. I bought my very first home out of a whim. And it has turned out changing me somewhat back to what I was before my Heikki, to the time I was with him and to this new I didn't know was possible. Don't get me wrong, at the eve of my Husband's 47th BD I'm vary but fine. This board (and it's predecessor) gave so much to me and I'm happy to report back that this little widda, is doing fine (although having the mandatory constant of what will go wrong next -thought as this cannot be happening to me!!!) Love doesn't go away. Humans have strong survival skills. All in due time.

@Hatchi a post worth the ones I saw 3 years ago in the original board. Such great words we know are true. Thank you <3 Been there, done that and moving forward

Congratulations TooSoon!!!!!!! Won't be participating there but will celebrate on my own location

Monique: I'm so sorry you have to go through that in addition to the terrible loss you have experienced. Very unjust! You are a widow just as much as the next person who lost their loved one. Legalities in this day and age are only blast from the past that at least in my country are being fixed/made more just to the various forms of partnership. I've had this discussion with many non-married widows and it's heartbreaking everytime. This is a peer support group for widows which does in my mind include non-married widows. If a widow/widower comes and slaps that "you are not a widow because you weren't married", I'd be shocked. That would be the worst insult ever. From a non-widow I do understand the ignorance and bad manners but from a fellow widow/widower, never and quite frankly at least here, I've never seen it and I'd rather not see it. Having read Mizpahs story and knowing what I felt about widow -term, I started to think that could it be a form of denial based on legalities to make it easier to take also for your mother? The Mizpah's example person refuses to be called a widow based on legalities, I didn't want to be called a widow even we were married, so could it be that seeing you in pain is too much for you mother so she takes the easy road (and hurtful one) of denying the term from you because it hurts her (and no! I am not defending her. This is just my thinking) Big hugs to you Monique and good (yet I'm sorry that you had to) that you found us. Someone once said this is the greatest group of people you never wanted to meet.

I admit. I was pushing myself from category to the next. then I reached the 1 year mark and thought I was ok. The h''l I was. but I learned that part only months sometimes years after. I'm still vary of that I got this brainiac (is that even a word) idea of looking flats near my sister and 1,5 weeks later I owned one. Lot's of renovations (building muscles and all but breathing easier). I'm fine being the crazy cat lady that moves next to family (we are forming a collective). Strange thing is, I'm feeling easier to breath, I can look into the future and still be a tad bit anxious No men involved (if you don't count my boys) Tweet reporting back

Like no! Assaulting a person is never accepted! Grief does weird things on us but that truly too much and you do not deserve that. Calling the police was the right thing to do. Are you safe now?

Bump

Bump

I'm in. Sorry I missed you S!

Bump

@Jen Hugs!!!! Fuck this shit! Why the fuck did my cat have to die just 6 days short of the second sadiversary of DH's death? Why the fuck does March has to be such a fucked up month in the 2010 decade? I used to love March because I have a birth day then. Why the fuck I'm tired and gloomy all the time? what the fuck is wrong with me? Why the fuck can't I have back the face I loved so much (yeah, looking at pics). AAAARGH! fuck this shit!

Now why is it, that when you turn someone down, they have to sucker punch you with inventive insults? Like, wow, thanks...

Bump. Could use company.

Bump

Hugs Jen! <3

I'd be in. could use company.

Haven't been around much since August last year when I felt that I needed to distance myself from all the widow boards I belonged to. I have peeked on occasions but ran away fast. It wasn't until a week ago that I started reading again and mostly because I so clearly remembered the vanishing of the old board, the weekend this board was rushed together and then Icoxwell and Baylee for we are so close together in the timeline. Well, today is the day when the world as I knew it changed forever at 10pm. It's still 11,5 hours to that o'clock. I'm sitting at work in a horrible physical pain that started to creep up on me beginning of December and then has just gotten worse and worse. The same pain I had exactly a year ago. I suppose the purpose of it, is to distract my mind and I think it's working. Feels like crap though. I read my old posts from the year one and especially my last years "1 year ago today" one and felt so stupid. As if things got better after the one year mark and bs about head full of ideas. The year turned out very different but then again I was in the survival mode and I had to believe in what I told myself and everyone around me. I was still very much messed up yet somehow functioning but how could have I known that. What I've learned that the truth is discovered only in time and only by looking back. I question my feelings and thoughts these days very much given the experience from the past two years. I'm not actively and consciously grieving anymore but given this pain, I'm blocking something in my head. In time and piece by piece I suppose even that goes away. I'm a bit scared of what year 3 brings and I'm so tired of all the things to be done and not being able to. I've missed this board even I didn't know it. Was so great to catch up with PJ and Sphock last evening on the chat. Felt right back at home. Don't know how much help I can be to this board but who knows, only time will tell. Don't really know what was the point of this post but it's way better than the one I wrote on Sunday. Missed you all! <3

Tweet in. Could use company

Me too <3

Congratulations!!!! We are close with saddies but this is such a great news!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm in

Heya Lady! Missed you and our conversations! I hardly ever come here anymore nor stop by the chat but you can reach me elsewhere (wink wink) if you want. Good to see you back though! HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tweetster flying solo in chat. For a decent flight pattern, more fliers would be nice

BK sorry I missed you!!!