The good and the bad

[Needytoo]

Career wise life is great, I am very busy and slightly overwhelmed but overall doing well. 

 

That other part of me is struggling.  Due to some unfortunate events in my life has caused an extreme case of anger, mistrust and hatred.  I couldn't sleep at night so I got on sleeping pills which caused horrible nightmares.  I hate this feeling.  Again I am finding I have no support in this.  Due to the unfortunate events, I am stepping away from a friendship.  It hurts and then a second later I am filled with anger towards her. 

 

I did reach out to a few of our members here, and so thankful for their responses.  It is dam lonely when there is no one to talk to.  It did help but still that anger, mistrust and hatred was sucking the life out of me.

 

So back into therapy I went.  I hate this feeling, I want it to stop. 

[Trying]

Tight hugs to you NeedyToo. It's hard to go through these life events without the one person who was always there to support you and have your back. I went through a lot anger in my first year about a friendship issue. I no longer have the anger but it has left me very uncomfortable trusting other friendships now. I think our defenses are so tapped out that it makes these other losses or betrayals harder to cope with.

[Needytoo]

I hate this feeling.

 

I have been working on developing boundaries with people. I did it with my sons and at work and I am amazed that everything has turned out for the better. 

 

I need to work on it with my friendships.  But having that betrayal part is a huge block. 

 

Back to taking one day at a time.

 

 

[Mrskro]

Needytoo;

 

I'm sorry that you are going through this. I've stepped away from a couple friendships that just weren't good for me.  Boundaries have always been tough for me too.  But I'm working on it. 

 

One thing that has helped me, (it came from here and I apologize I don't remember who said it)

I can't change another persons actions, I can only change my reaction to them.