Any one else separated from their spouse when their death occurred?

[Indira]

My husband and I were separated for about 9 months before he passed away. We were talking divorce but never actually went through with it. We had both moved on, I have a boyfriend and I'm currently pregnant and he had a girlfriend too.

 

We have 2 sons, 11 and 7, because I was still his wife I had to make all arrangements for him.

 

People seem to be confused about what to say to me, I understand that. I wish I could tell them that even though we were separated and we had both moved on his death still affects me. I loved the man for 14 years, at the end I was not in love with him but loved him none the less, we spend some awesome years together. I still cry because I can't seem to believe that he's gone. That our kids will not have him in their lives.

 

How did you deal with their deaths?

[tybec]

Not my experience, but sounds difficult. 

 

Maybe that is what you can say.  "Thank you.  I loved my boys' dad very much for a long time.  It is hard to believe he is gone, and my sons will not have in their lives. "

[Guest nonesuch]

The day I decided I would have to leave my husband, I got home and he told me he had lung cancer. 

 

When I was young, I thought by the time people divorced they must not love one another.  I know different, now. I loved my husband, still, even though it was not healthy for us and didn't make either of us happy. Owing to the location of his tumor, he died within six weeks.