sikeuritgadeun Posted February 1, 2017 Share Posted February 1, 2017 And I am very weary. Alone, bitter. afraid and feeling the way I did back in the beginning. I am very afraid I will be like this forever. My children are ungrateful dolts and I have no help from them. I can not get them to move or get out of my house. They seem to be in a tag team against me. I am this close to moving and not leaving a forwarding address. I am venting here so no need to answer. I am so tired, tired of being without my husband. I guess I did something very wrong to be dealing with this, I just don't know what it was. I was a good person who tried to help others. Now I am all alone. Why was he taken from me when I needed him the most. I am almost broken to the point of giving up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beyondlife Posted February 1, 2017 Share Posted February 1, 2017 hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest oneoftwo Posted February 1, 2017 Share Posted February 1, 2017 Hi sikeuritgadeun- I also am 7 yrs alone. And yesterday I also had a day like you describe. I scolded my last child at home that if his 4-H leader (my words:) "If ***, who is the rudest person around, is calling you out that you're being rude to me- you better think about it". He actually has been nicer since I said that. I don't know how old your kids are, when I'd been away at college for a year (and my 3 older siblings were still at home) my parents did just that- moved 3 hours away. I do wonder and have never asked about the conversation- musta been interesting "Hey moochers, the gravy train has ended!" But don't give up, just be patient with yourself, and know that some days/hours/minutes are better. Wait out the bad times. But if you need to be more forward with the kids about them becoming adults, well that might be an option. We're here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bumbleb Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 I hit the 7 year mark in Oct. and weary describes it. I also worry that I'm wallowing again in my bitter grief and I'm not sure how to push past it. I put on a good front at work, and my kids are acting okay, but I'm so damn exhausted by the time 9pm rolls around I just collapse. I understand and sending hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheelerswife Posted February 4, 2017 Share Posted February 4, 2017 7+ for DH1. Sometimes I ask myself - was that really my life? 3 years for DH2. Sometimes I ask myself - was that really my life. 2017. Is this really my life? Hugs, Maureen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sikeuritgadeun Posted February 5, 2017 Author Share Posted February 5, 2017 Thanks everyone. I am sorry we feel this way. I have been sleeping a lot or tossing and turning getting no sleep. My body hurts and my mind keeps racing but I am not getting anywhere. I feel so alone. I have been crying and I have been so out of it. Not taking calls, not leaving the house. I can't seem to snap out of this. It all looks and feels hopeless to me. I came here today to thank you all for understanding. No one in my life does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killedNY Posted February 28, 2017 Share Posted February 28, 2017 I am seven years out on Feb. 22. Feel sad and lost, pretty often. Feel like wasting my life. Just doing my time... My kids are good though, and I am planning finally move from the house lived for 22 years...But will I find my "new myself"? My life was amazing before I lost my Love...I don't like my life without Her... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladybug Posted March 4, 2017 Share Posted March 4, 2017 I understand how you feel. This summer will be my 9th without my sweet husband. Some days are a lot harder than others. Hope you are feeling better today. HUGS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sikeuritgadeun Posted March 5, 2017 Author Share Posted March 5, 2017 Thank you I am lost, alone. It is hard and unreal to me. I am trying to live but it is nothing like I had before. I never imagined this would be my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimiRed Posted March 7, 2017 Share Posted March 7, 2017 {{Hugs}} 7 years... it'll be 8 this September, and I still have bad days. My family will tell me "You need to let that go, do you have to go back to the past, and so on... more that I can write and more that ticks me off. Because they will never "get it". A teenage son too that I know his Dad would have handled much better. He would have the right words to say and of course, we'd be a team raising him. I'm told I'm not an "only" or a single parent. I'm told my parents are right here and they help. Ohhh Kaayyyy.... no one has my back when I'm trying to get him to take out the trash, clean his room, needs a ride home or to work, help with homework, and so on. Just sending you hugs and know that you are not alone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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