Happiness journey

[Momtojandj]

I'm sorry this will be long , hopefully not rambling ..

Somewhat of a back story ... my mom had a massive stroke about 9 years ago, recovered to a new normal then died 2 years later of a heart attack. Those two things sent me into anxiety and depression . Something scary and I had never dealt with before. My husband tried to help, he didn't understand what I was going through . I was put on medicine and went to see someone . However after about a year and a half , I felt ashamed and embarrassed almost , that there was something wrong with me . With my doctors help , I tapered off and stop taking anything .

  Then my world as I knew totally changed , my husband was killed and I was in shock, depression , anxiety .. you name it. Went back to the doctor and back on medicine . This time , I saw a different doctor and realized there's no shame in needing help .

  So here I am now , it will be five years in October. Maybe it's that , or that both my kids are driving , college , graduating , dating sucks...I've been in a bad funk , depressed . Just off .

  I found an article , and actually shared it on my Facebook. The short version of the article is happiness is a journey , not a destination. We don't need to wait to get married, have a baby , get a new job, take a vacation to say Oo I'll be happy then. We need to focus on something small in every day to be happy . So far , for me it's working . As soon as my mind goes to a dark place , I quickly replace it with something happy. This is huge for me , I've for a long time said well if only ... I would be happy.

        For me also , this isn't about being grateful, trust me I'm very grateful for my family , kids , friends etc. this is about being happy . And realizing that getting a boyfriend , new job won't make me happy . I need to be happy everyday .

  I needed to say this, or just write this out. Thanks for reading this far . I still plan to make sure my medicine is ok and not needing adjustment , and I also realize like anything "wrong " I shouldn't be embarrassed to need help , medicine or a therapist.

[Julester3]

I am glad things are looking positive for you. You are absolutely correct. You have to keep looking for the silver lining in things and find the little bits of happiness it can bring. I feel it really helps and they can add up in a day. For example, I am happy for hot coffee, a yummy snack, the sun shining, a warm day, having a good hair day, getting my chores done...any little thing that can give you a tiny smile is like a small dose of positive medicine.

 

 

[trying2breathe]

Momtojandj  Thank you for the reminder to enjoy today, for whatever it offers.

 

 

"Happiness is a journey, not a destination"  < indeed!

[Needytoo]

Thank you so much for posting this. 

 

I hope everyone find happiness today and everyday.