sojourner Posted September 2, 2017 Share Posted September 2, 2017 Even though the actual date isn't until almost mid-week, since I was married the Saturday of Labor Day weekend, this always feels like my weddding day. Wow- 30 years ago. He was here for just over 26 and a half of them. His cancer was diagnosed right before our 25th, so that one was spent in chemo, with a short trip later. He should be here. We should be celebrating on a trip, drinking champagne somewhere together, with an ocean in view. Instead, I'm working to prepare for hosting a big family dinner Monday, thinking how in a short time I'll be turning the same age he was when he died almost 3 and a quarter years ago, looking at my yard that I need to mow today. I want my old life back. This sucks, and that's a huge understatement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julester3 Posted September 2, 2017 Share Posted September 2, 2017 Hugs and fortitude for you today! September is hard for me too. My wedding anniversary is next Saturday. This weekend is my daughter's birthday. We are trudging on as much as we wished we didn't have to. I miss my husband fiercely too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 Yup ..august 31 st would have been our 26th wedding anniversary and yes they should be here to celebrate Take care of yourself Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CJF Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 This time of the year always gets me too - Thursday would be our 26th anniversary. This weekend is my son's birthday and he is away at college now so that makes it a little harder as well. Feeling the loneliness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Still Standing Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 August 31 would have been 34 yrs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sojourner Posted September 6, 2017 Author Share Posted September 6, 2017 This whole week, I've felt so exhausted, along with general sadness. Not many real hard tears, but an overwhelming need for sleep. My energy was completely sapped. I've taken longer naps this past weekend than I have in a long time, and slept so hard during them. Hopefully my body got the rest it seemed to need, and I get more energy back. No one in my day to day life really has bad intentions, but they (thankfully for them) don't have a clue what the widowed experience is like. Also, I intentionally minimize talking about it to my family; I have a sister with terminal cancer, and I don't want to burden them, esp. my sister and BIL. Thanks, and sympathies to you all, too. I'm glad/sorry you're here! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julester3 Posted September 6, 2017 Share Posted September 6, 2017 I am feeling the pre-date anxiety already leading up to my anniversary this Saturday. A song on the radio on the way to work did me in - ugly sobbing ensued. Just another week in the life of a widow...that's what it feels like today. I had to adult this morning at my daughter's IEP review and will have to gather strength to get through parent night tonight. I know I'm succeeding adequately but it doesn't quite feel that way to me sometimes. Hugs for combined strength all around! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sojourner Posted September 8, 2017 Author Share Posted September 8, 2017 J3, thinking of you, with your imminent anniversary date. I ended up acknowleging the time by going out for lunch every day this week. Nothing pricey or fancy, certainly nothing like the trip we'd have taken together, as that'd just make me sad being by myself. But it was a little something to make note of the anniversary, even if only to myself. And it was better than sitting at home alone. Peace to you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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