MCG Posted July 26, 2020 Share Posted July 26, 2020 (edited) I’m new to this forum. I lost my husband to suicide by a self-inflicted GSW last Mother’s Day. He was an army veteran who served 2 tours in Iraq. I was completely blindsided by what he chose to do. And he did it while my children and I were in the house. I have two kids under 5. I’m 35. I’m still struggling with grief and trauma but have reached a stage where I contemplate dating and remarrying. I want to find a good partner for myself and solid man to be step-father for my girls. However, I’m not sure this is even possible because of the stigma attached to suicide. Virtually every time I have revealed the cause of J’s death to a guy I’m interested in on a dating site I get ghosted. I fully understand that the prospect of dating someone who has “baggage” let alone the “baggage” of the suicide of their spouse is complicated and potentially heavy. But it seems unfair that for most people it’s a complete non-starter. I know I could choose not to reveal how my husband died for a while but eventually it’s going to have to be addressed. I have tended to be upfront about it fairly early on just because to hide it and later have to explain, seems to further incriminate me. I have struggled with immense guilt over J’s suicide. My children and I love him. We miss him every day. It seems that having to deal with all that is not enough. We get to be marginalized and robbed of a chance to rebuild because of people’s lack of understanding around suicide. Has anyone on here successfully navigated these issues? Have you dated or remarried? How did you handle it in the early phase of getting to know someone? Edited July 26, 2020 by MCG Clarification Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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