Chopperette

One month and a half before my LH died he bought Max for my DD. We all cherish him since it was his latest gift. They were very close... I guess things haven't change much for him after 2 years... This is my baby boy Lucas...

Beautiful message Jason! I gladly shared it already!

Today my DD was telling me that while we were on a trip in Dec 2012, she sensed her dad was going to die. She told me that during the trip I mentioned that we should go visit my grandma when got back since we didn't know how much time she had left. (She was 96) My daughter said she didn't want to because she didn't even know who she was anyway. My LH said we should and that he wanted to go visit her too. Well apparently at that moment a thought just popped into her head. She thought why is he saying that if he is not going to see her, since he is going to die before her. She said she felt so guilty for the thought, and also she feels responsible for not saying anything. If she had said something maybe he would have gone to the doctor and discover the aneurysm. I told her that she didn't have to feel guilty because she wasn't responsible and she couldn't have prevented it either. She said she never said anything before because she thought it was idiotic to think. Her father was going to die before her 96 yo great grandmother. I told her that was exactly what we would have thought, that it was like a nightmare or something and not a premonition, since she wasn't a psychic. (Indeed he died March 21/2013he didn't make it to his 53rd birthday. My grandma died May 19/2013 and she. Made it to 97) I'm sad that she has been feeling so guilty for almost two years! But I hope letting it out her chest helped her. :'(

Congratulations Jessica! With that determination, I'm sure you are going to ace that exam!

Hi Deedee. I'm sorry for your loss. In our grief we forget to take care of ourselves. Be conscious that is not only you in that body. Please remember to drink plenty of liquids and eat even if you don't have appetite.

Beautiful Stargazer! It will always hit you because our natural response to many things is to share it with them and then wam it hits you! After time, you start to just think *sigh* he/she would have enjoyed this.

I'm glad you are heading to a better place. I'm 10 days away from 2 years. and I just can't believe so much time have passed. I mean, it was only yesterday!

Thank you for your comments. It is good to know that I'm not alone in this line of thought.

(((((Jason))))) You are in my thoughts, and hope that everything went fine, well as fine as it can go. Sending you tight hugs.

This is long, sorry in advance..... Two weeks ago, my mom had a transient ischemic attack. Fortunately she is recuperating at gigantic steps. My kids and I had a very rough time that day, since my LH had a ruptured brain aneurysm it was like reliving the same thing again it even happened on a Sunday in March as it did to him. By now, my mom has told and retold what she felt and she says she was conscious of her surroundings all the time, but she simply couldn't respond. (She lost speech and movement of her entire right side) Yesterday was my aunt's birthday and we were discussing with my cousin about how a friend of his father must feel since he had a stroke 6 years ago and can't speak and has no movement on his right arm. Well long story short a few minutes later said friend showed up. I was so heartbroken to see a bright man be treated like he couldn't understand. My cousin hauled me to him and asked him loudly and slowly, mind you, if he remembered me. Of course his eyes had a twinkle and he gave me a hug. He was a cool old guy when I was a teenager so we got along very well. Of course this got me to think about DH and believe it or not it brought me comfort that he didn't survive and was left in a living hell. Of course a second later I felt ashamed for thinking that way!! I would give anything to have him back! Sorry for the rambling but this was just too much for me

Congratulations to both of you!

(((((Sandy))))) I'm sorry for your loss. Don't try to fit any mold. The crying will come when you least expected. My DH also travel a lot for work and I thought around two months out that this trip has been the longest. I knew what had happened but unconsciously I was denying it. It's a natural self-defense mechanism. Please don't forget to take care of yourself, drink plenty of water and don't forget to eat.

A friend told me at almost 21 months out I pray every day for him to have a chance to get into heaven, that is if he made it into purgatory... I was......

When I was in Brooklyn in Sept., we had lunch with people from the board and others from a local meet up that weren't on the board. It was a very nice experience. I would love to do it in the future if I get to travel to the USA again.

I have the logo back after login out an then back in, thank you!!

Thank you mokie this is much better!!! Unfortunately we lose the logo, but I guess it's the price to pay!

I don't know who came with the logo, but kudos to whoever did. I think is wonderful that hands entwine to form the W. It simply reflects our mission here. Thanks again to @Jess, @Justin, @Wifeless @Bluebird @Baylee627 @Just Jen @LisaPop @Shelby for taking the time to provide us our safe heaven!

I have Sjogren's Syndrome and Raynaud's nothing is life threatening there are just conditions that sometimes are very irritating! When it's cold my hands get red, then turn purple and finally white. Thank God I live in a mild weathered country.

Hi, I'm Chopperette. My husband of 24 years, was a healthy 52 yo. He was a helicopter pilot (hence my screen name). He had hypertension but was medicated and had it under control. He had a week were he couldn't bring his BP down. But was feeling better, he even went flying Saturday at noon. That Saturday night he complained of a splitting headache we barely slept that night. I kept asking him if he wanted to go to the hospital but he kept refusing. Sunday morning (St Patrick's Day ha the luck of the Irish wasn't with me) he went downstairs and fed the dogs. When he came to our room he started to get dressed and I asked him where he was going. He didn't answer me. He went downstairs and yelled to me to take him to the hospital. I told him that I'll take him as soon as I got dressed. When I came down, he had the car running, the garage door opened and he was seated in the copilot's seat. I drove him to the nearest hospital and he complained that I was driving too fast, which I wasn't I think he was dizzy. I noticed that he wasn't wearing his seat belt and asked him to buckle up. He told me he couldn't see but he was able to do it anyway. When we were 2 blocks from the hospital his breathing got labored and he was rigid for a second. I just rubbed his arm and told him to hang in there, that we were really close to the hospital. When we got there I noticed both his hands were curled. I was told he answered some questions but his speech got slurred. Shortly he lost conscious and was put on a ventilator. The doctors said it was a ruptured brain aneurysm. He had two procedures but there was no brain activity at all. He finally passed away Thursday March 21st/2013, 4 days before my 48th birthday. I'm trying to do my best to survive and support my 25 yo son and 21 yo daughter. OH in case you were wondering my profile pic was taken during his burial. There were several helicopters flying over us (most of them were his students) and throwing rose petals. It was beautiful and touching. Also an important fact... I'm from Guatemala, so English is not my first language, so sometimes I have difficulty expressing myself (so I always edit my posts)