br0peth

I haven't gotten sick yet although my stomach has been in knots ever since. Tearing as I write. Hang in there.

I'm following in your journey friend. New here as well to these boards. http://widda.org/index.php/topic,1626.0.html I'm ache for my wife too. She was my sunshine. I'm here for you.

This band has been helping me a lot, one of my favorites. I miss my wife. She died 2 weeks ago. I hope it gives comfort to anyone.

Thank you for sharing. Its a completely surreal experience. The crying washing over me like waves on a beach is relentless at times. My love of music has been helping a lot. The loneliness that has presented itself at night and in the morning is heart breaking. I ache. I find comfort reading peoples posts that I'm sure I will get stronger as the time goes. In the mean time, this just completely sucks. I miss her so much.

I found this website while reading Reddit and was recommended to come here and share. Tragically, my wife of 16 years (24 together) died last week. She had a seizure in the middle of the night that caused her heart to stop. I tried to breathe for her but was unsure the extent of what was happening as she never had a seizure in her life, cops were here in minutes and performed CPR. Ambulance came and they took her away. 4 days later she was pronounced brain dead and I removed her off the breathing machine. She was gone in a minute. I knew the machine was only keeping her alive, I knew my wife died in the room with me that night. She was also a breast cancer survivor for 5 years. We have a 9 year old and 6 year old that seem to be taking ok. They miss momma. I miss her too every second. I now feel that I cant move on. I know I am still in the beginnings of grief. The companionship is what I miss. He hugs, kisses and everything else. She was my best friend. I have had some extreme guilt wash over me this past week. I guess we all go through it when we grieve. What more could I have done? What signs were in place that I missed? I protected my wife for a long time and still feel the guilt that I must some how failed her this time. I know now that that it wasn't up to me that night. The trauma of that night will live with me forever. My life literally changed with a snap of your finger. We had so many plans. Maybe I'm just typing to no one. I'm just trying to talk. The depression has sunk in and really feeling it. I know I don't have a unique story. I'm hoping to share similar experiences with someone. Thanks to anyone who responds.