I don't want to do this anymore.

[Missmybecky]

I never complain but, I am tired and I don't want this lifestyle anymore.

Thanks for listening.

[donswife]

I agree , just want my old life back

this one is exhausting

[SimiRed]

{{{Hugs}}}

 

Yes,  this journey  of widowhood sucks!

[Guest TooSoon]

For what it is worth, I will never forget the day I realized that I simply just could not even (as my students would say) with one more day of what I think you're describing.  Could not even deal with one more day of it all being about me, of paralysis, of so many things. 

 

From that day forward, I made it my mission not to live it anymore.  It remains a work in progress but I had to get to that place before I could consciously choose to make some changes that would help me to lift myself out.

 

I still have cannot even days.  I had one yesterday, in fact.  They appear to be part of the deal.  But once I started making changes - first little ones, then bigger ones and, well, I've not yet managed any major ones - mornings seemed a little brighter and I started to feel stronger again and slowly I've been able to take on more and more. 

 

Above all, be kind to yourself.  Solidarity! 

[Wheelerswife]

Yeah.  I get it.  Hang in there, though.

 

Hugs,

 

Maureen

[widowat33]

Me neither.

It is tiring and seems like it will never get easier but as I think about last year at this time I realize it has gotten a tiny teeny bit easier. So I have to hold onto the hope that with time it will continue to get easier. There will still be bad days, but hopefully the good days will outnumber the bad. That is my wish for you, myself, and everyone here.

[Guest sunshinedaydreamz]

I think one day I woke up, said I can't change things, did what I knew at the time was the right thing, and it started getting better.

Hope is a strong emotion.

[Mizpah]

The slogging sucks, no doubt about it.  We're all here to cheer you on, either from further on down the path or right next to you. 

[SoVerySad]

Sending you tight hugs of support. It is tiring. Stating that truth isn't complaining - just acknowledging how you are feeling right now. I can totally relate. It is hard to suddenly be in a life you didn't choose or lay any sort of foundation for.

[Sugarbell]

Oh I get this....Somewhere around year 2 and 3 sheer exhaustion kicked in mixed with complicated grief. Somewhere along the threshold it did get easier...I don't know if my mind and body just started coping accepting if better...but. There were plenty of days that I just didn't want to get outta bed and face the day.

 

Hang in there!! We get it...

[Jen]

Nope. Just all kinds of nope. I don't want to do it anymore, I'm sick of it, I'm done. You have every right to complain-- we got handed a big ol' pile of unmitigated crap, and it's not fair in the least. Somehow, we keep going. I've only made it this far because y'all make me realize I'm not alone. I'll be honest, I'm not always thankful for that-- if I were alone, I could stop, I could lay down and die. But I keep getting dragged forward... and mostly, I love you all for it. Mostly.

 

Lots and lots of hugs. I think the advice we give the newly widowed still applies to us: Breathe. Just breathe. We're here.

[momtokam]

I so hear you....

You have every right to feel this way, this stuff just sucks!

One step, minute, and day at a time. It's all we can do.