Lady Mary of Downton Abbey widowed for real

[Mizpah]

Back to the original topic: I was so heartbroken when Lady Mary lost her husband in the show - sobbing, and I very, very rarely cry.  Feel so bad for her now.  Even though we went through it, I can't imagine those early feelings.  I'm so glad to have forgotten so much of the early days.

[THATgurl]

I also really wish we didn't get caught up in discussions of who should be called a widow/er.

 

Sorry, all (serpico included!) - I obviously have some hangups and issues about terminology based on my (and many of my young wid friends') complicated situation (example: in my State, DH was on my insurance based on our legal status and I was allowed to make medical decisions, but I wasn't allowed to take him off of my medical insurance or to get his medical records to prove that he was dead so he could be off my insurance, because we weren't married - dealing with the logistical aftermath of his death was absurd and nightmarish, and felt like several slaps in the face when I could least handle them). 

 

I'm clearly a bit oversensitive to this (still, 4 1/2 years later!) and that's no one's fault here, and I'm sorry for inflicting it on you!  Carry on.  I'll be chill, I promise.

 

Personally, I don't think you are oversensitive at all.  I probably worded my thoughts poorly.  I know you went through some very rough stuff and I am so sorry that happens to you or anyone.  Over my years chatting with widdas, the "who is a widow" conversation never goes well and, for this group, likely leads to loss of some members and less frequent posting from others.  I personally think the reason it goes so poorly is that people tend to come at the issue from one of three perspectives (though they blur to some extent) - religious, legal, and societal recognition type things.  My personal opinion is that people are entitled to their own personal beliefs in terms of religion and if a group has diverse membership, that reality should be respected within the group.  Of course, not everyone agrees with me there.  On the legal side of things it can all just be a huge mess and I believe lots of reform is needed.  In terms of societal recognition type stuff - another big mess, but I am not really sure why either of Kim K's marriages should be regarded as having more worth or value than Goldie Hawn's long-term, committed relationship.

[fairlanegirl]

Back to the original topic: I was so heartbroken when Lady Mary lost her husband in the show - sobbing, and I very, very rarely cry.  Feel so bad for her now.  Even though we went through it, I can't imagine those early feelings.  I'm so glad to have forgotten so much of the early days.

Yes, I missed a whole series after that, I saw it coming and ended up saying 'You bastards!' (ie the scriptwriters) at the screen! 'Why couldn't you have made him emigrate to NZ in time-honoured British telly fashion like on the soaps (because to some folk it is like going to the moon from the UK :-))

And sorry if I did do a spoiler - are you a series or two behind in the US?

[Guest TooSoon]

I was super not expecting that plot twist - I was pretty mad at Julian. 

 

No, you haven't given any spoilers!  The last season starts here in January and I'm going to miss the first episode bc I will be, of all places, in England....

 

 

[Guest TalksToAngels]

Regedit