RobFTC Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 Shelby, that had to have cut through you like a knife to have heard that. I wish you strength for your next steps. Take care, Rob T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 Shelby, I am sending you tight hugs. From all your posts, I have seen a loving, caring person. Perhaps as the non-widowed cannot understand the deep pain of losing a spouse, some non-parents cannot understand the love we have for our children and our need to be their advocates and their soft place to fall. I think this is especially true for those of us who are now solo parents - we literally are the only parent our children have left to count on. Your husband's unwillingness to being open to consider your feelings on the issue are really disappointing and must hurt deeply. Requiring a choice between him or helping your children as their only parent is at a minimum heartless. It seems like you are not being given a chance to work together to make a mutually compromising decision. To me, that is what marriage should be. One-sided stubbornness often leads to resentment (deserved). I'm hoping you can find peace with making a decision that feels right for you - one that you've played an active role in discussing and feel is equitable. Perhaps your children may have been too coddled. Given what you've been through already in terms of loss, I understand and support your desire to err on the side of caution and help them as much as you are able to. I would feel the same desire. Adding more hugs, dear lady.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Posted February 19, 2016 Share Posted February 19, 2016 I would go to counseling myself to try and shake out whether your kids need help or if you are enabling. But I know God will forgive you if you end your marriage. Especially for the sake of your kids welfare. He took vows too. Doesnt seem he's living up to them. Wishing you all the best. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted February 19, 2016 Share Posted February 19, 2016 But marriage isn't about power and ultimatums and refusal to negotiate. Shelby, so sad to hear about this and about your deteriorating health situation. Adding my virtual support to the chorus. I believe Wheelerswife has captured the crux of the issue above. Best wishes as you navigate through this. It is not fair- you have suffered enough. In solidarity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shelby Posted February 21, 2016 Author Share Posted February 21, 2016 I'm hanging in, guys. I so appreciate the support, encouragement and prayers. I'll keep you posted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bear Tomás Posted February 21, 2016 Share Posted February 21, 2016 No advice, just (((hugs))). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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