Parent-teacher conferences

[RobFTC]

So it's that time of year again where I trundle into the high school to find out how bad the chronic "missing assignment" disease is with my girls.  Yup, still there, but the rash has faded a bit from last year :-)  They each have some low grades, and some grades that their teachers know are low for their ability.  I diagnosed Rebecca's issue with one class correctly, and got some very targeted guidance for what's up for the second-lowest grade.  Sarah's got a nightmare grade right now, but it's not as dire as it appears.  She was very unhappy with her schedule because lunch was so late in the day, but took weeks to actually go in and get it changed, so she won't get credit for work done in one old class but gets a long grace period to do the work assigned for the new class.  She also has some could-be-better grades marked by missing work, which I think just stems from her disorganization.  But both have more decent-to-good grades than issues.  I am trying to let their grades be their grades, asking about how they feel about them and offering to coach.  I can ask better questions today.

 

It was also fun to talk to some of the teachers for classes they are doing well in.  Rebecca's choir teacher is very pleased, and her German teacher likes her a lot and thinks she's doing well.  Sarah's orchestra teacher thinks the step-up to symphony has been a challenge Sarah's thriving on, and when I reintroduced myself to her French teacher, she grabbed my arm and gushed about how much she loved everything about my daughter :-)  That one brought tears, because I know how much Sarah loves her, too.

 

It's so good to have them back in school - the structure has smoothed Rebecca out, especially.

 

Take care,

Rob T

[trying2breathe]

"I am trying to let their grades be their grades, asking about how they feel about them and offering to coach.  I can ask better questions today."

 

This was usually my strategy too.  I felt that by high school, there wasn't too much that I could do to affect my kids' attitudes towards certain classes and their efforts made towards those classes.  That being said, I did have conversations with DD on how to manage a Spanish class with a teacher that she really didn't care for.  It was more about managing a relationship rather than doing the course work. 

 

Conferences were a chance to communicate with teachers to get real information, something that my kids might not otherwise share.  How great to have a tearful moment with a teacher, so sweet.  You have much to be proud of with your girls!

 

DD is my youngest and a senior this year, it's bittersweet that this is our last year of conferences.

[Indira]

I'm dreading the next parent teacher conference. Dad was always at the school, volunteering for anything and everything. All the parents and teachers knew him. I once was told by another parent that they thought I was being made up. They didn't think I existed. She didn't mean it to be mean, I know that much. I worked a lot and he got to do all the school things with the kids. Now its so different I'm trying not to work as much and be there at school but it doesn't change the fact that he will not be there.......

[twin_mom]

I'm dreading the next parent teacher conference. Dad was always at the school, volunteering for anything and everything. All the parents and teachers knew him. I once was told by another parent that they thought I was being made up. They didn't think I existed. She didn't mean it to be mean, I know that much. I worked a lot and he got to do all the school things with the kids. Now its so different I'm trying not to work as much and be there at school but it doesn't change the fact that he will not be there.......

 

I hear you!! DH was older than me and retired, so he was there I've to do all the school stuff while I worked on my career, complete with international travel every month. Last year I quit my job to stay home, and the comments I've heard are crazy... And it throws my kids off that I'm the one there instead of him, even now at 4 years out.

[RobFTC]

I should add an update.  It's not all I want, but not all bad.

 

Rebecca dug in and passed all of her classes, including the AP class she was struggling with.  Not banner grades, but more good than bad.  She seems to be tracking better, and keeping up with things despite the self-diagnosed depression.

 

Sarah failed *two* classes last semester, an English and a Geography class.  She's just so unresponsive - low grades are not a clue she picks up on that she should do something different, and her habits are etched in stone and don't readily change.  She'd tried to make a difference in Geo by doing a big extra-credit project, but she says she may have missed the hard deadline to turn it in by just a few minutes :-(  Sigh.  Worse, after a "don't miss assignments" deal with me, she missed more English assignments, prompting a parent-teacher-counselor meeting the other week.  I think that got her a get-well plan for the stuff she failed.  She's got a chunk in the afternoon without her phone apps now, and has responded somewhat to that.  I am again trying to ask questions rather than give orders, and we'll see how it goes.

 

Take care,

Rob T