MR

I am so sorry for your loss. I think the best thing would be to tell people that you are not ready to talk about him or his death and once you are ready you will talk. This will give you time to go thru your grief and most people will forget about it.

Hugs

Manoj

It will come soon.. I have noticed as everyone is not going thru the same it is difficult for them to face you. I have joined some groups where people are separated or divorced or widowed and felt it is good as they are in almost similar situation so easy to mix up after few meetings.

So true. I think biggest thing we learned with the passage of time is to deal with this grief and thus it feels better. Earlier I was crying almost everytime I was driving or alone now it happens randomly and sometimes it doesn't happen to days.

Hi Arney3,

You are already strong person and so sorry for your losses. Strong doesn't mean just by physical it does mean combination of lots of other stuff. Just take one day at a time, spend your time with little one and take out some time for yourself too.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi Bambi,

Sorry to hear what happened with you. Don't know the exact why he would do the physical assault part but you already called cops and taught him lesson. I think (might be wrong) what you husband's friend's are saying makes sense as it will ruin his life as it will go on his file. Don't consider anything what he says as it has no meaning and only you know your relationship with your late husband. Consider if he was your own son and not stepson what would you do.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi Michael797,

So sorry to hear about your loss. Don't have words to express my feeling. Please take care of yourself.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi DragonTears,

Please write and share as it becomes kind of therapy for other forum users like me who are quite new to the journey. I have learned so much in terms of myself, this journey and other aspects here that there was no way I could learn that much outside in the real world.

Hugs

Manoj

Hugs

Yes It is difficult to go back to those places. I went back to the hospital to pick some docs within a month of death and I was in rush to leave asap. Probably should go back in ward and thank everyone which I missed at that time due to my grief which is still there but I suppose now brain is also working parallel. Not sure good idea or not but may be will go.

HI,

See this is the strength of this forum and all broken people are trying to help each other. Biggest thing is that we are going thru the grief which only few people experience so difficult to find people but when  you are on this forum we are all together to help each other. Keep posting and also read some old threads and write as much as you want considering no one is going to judge you. I found big comfort doing this as I am not a person who can write journals.

Hugs

Manoj

Thank you so much Julie, Manoj and Mizpah. Your words have brought me so much comfort. I just can't help staring into the future without him and the horror of his loss won't leave me. The future is so bleak and nothing holds my attention for long, and I break down again. I'm so glad for the comforting words here, where I live there isn't much of support for this, but I do have wonderful parents and a sister, however they are so worried about me I find them overwhelming. I never thought I'd find myself here, that he will never come home to me again. I haven't had an independent thought since I was 24. Our love was so immense, but reading other people's experiences makes me realise I'm not the only one in the world who feels like this.

HCE: My story is so similar not sure why but after her death all dreams I can remember either we were having her Creamanating or some thing to do with death.

Now no dreams like that but infact no dreams about at all.

Hi AlisonF,

So sorry for your loss and it sucks to be part of this group but again this group is where you will get so peace seeing and talking to people who are going or gone thru the same process. Lots of good advice will come.

Julester3 : So nicely you have put the words. I totally agree with each word and sentence.

AlisonF please take care of yourself, eat and drink water as much as you wish. If you don't feel like eating please eat small portions. Next few weeks will be torture but again we all have to go thru it. Once the brain will start accepting the truth the pain will not be less but I suppose we learn to deal with it.

Hugs

Manoj

I feel for your NG daughter. Yes you will be blamed for everything so get ready  :)

Hi nonesuch,

So sorry to hear it. Don't have to express my feeling , You and he will be in my prayers.

Hugs

Manoj

Did you write? As it so true.. Beautiful made me feel better especially

I have never felt stronger because I am surviving. No other challenge will be this hard. I have also never felt weaker because I truly understand you cannot control everything. It is a terrifying truth.

Thanks

Manoj

Comedy..

Summer or Winter

Hi Dragonfly,

It will happen some weeks will be much tougher than others. Some days I am normal but other days cry like as I did in 2nd month. So just move forward with flow, If you feel like crying nothing wrong with it. Few minutes back I was with MIL and she was crying on phone and I was telling her I think my tears have dried and then while going in underground parking I was crying so emotions are a difficult thing for us to handle.

Hugs

Manoj

I think what you are doing is right as once she stops getting attention she will not bother you and him.

We never spoke about it and god didn't gave chance to talk as it was medical accident and she never ever woke up.

picnic but after long drive

windows or mac

Wow SB you are good at it, You are spending some time and brain to make sure no wanted scene is created. Happy that it worked out as you planned. I suppose it is worth thinking all this and avoiding as far as you can and hopefully she will get message.

I suppose after some time our of the forum member can write book about Dating div.....

Neither would prefer long car drive as use to do with my DW. Sometimes drove 800-1000 Kms at one night

City or resort.

Hi Lostdove124,

I am so sorry for your loss. Initial 1-3 months will be like this where you will think all the stuff which may or may not make sense but that's part of the grief. You will cry and then in a sec be normal because daughter came to you. Mind is one of the things which can move at higher speed than light so let it play games. I agree with Julester3 try to break the routine and do things which could be different from your everyday routine. Try to concentrate on kid, work and most imp your health.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi JHawk,

Sorry have to welcome you to forum nobody wanted to join. Yes here you will find very good and supporting people who has and will help us to go thru this path.

Please take care of yourself as first few months are difficult as we lose hope to live.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi Mona,

So sorry for your loss. We all have noticed that most of our so called friends disappear from our life once you are widow(er). I kept myself strong after losing my wife as needed to take care of kids one started uni after 2 days of funeral and other started 9th. If I broke in front of them it might have affected their studies. I kept crying alone and kept moving forward. No 2 days were same but I stopped expecting anything from friends. Doesn't have my family here everyone is in India so couldn't count much on them. My mom was here so she was taking care of food. We all grief differently so no 2 person will have similar healing path but you can always get up and try to take charge of your life. Support group of forums like this is life saver as people will not judge you here.

Hugs

Manoj

Hi Mona,

So sorry for your loss. We all have noticed that most of our so called friends disappear from our life once you are widow(er). I kept myself strong after losing my wife as needed to take care of kids one started uni after 2 days of funeral and other started 9th. If I broke in front of them it might have affected their studies. I kept crying alone and kept moving forward. No 2 days were same but I stopped expecting anything from friends. Doesn't have my family here everyone is in India so couldn't count much on them. My mom was here so she was taking care of food. We all grief differently so no 2 person will have similar healing path but you can always get up and try to take charge of your life. Support group of forums like this is life saver as people will not judge you here.

Hugs

Manoj