momtokam

Happy Easter to all that celebrate! Enjoy the day! Mine is actually next week so we have had a free relaxing long weekend!

At 9 months I was feeling like I wanted to start living again. I felt like I couldn't keep being sad and started to change my outlook a bit. I started looking around the dating sites but it was at around a year out that I met someone worth meeting. Was I ready? Not sure. We dated about a year but I still wasn't sure. I ended it because I felt it wasn't fair to him. Kids and exes really complicate things. I tried again to poke around the dating sites. After a month I quit. Maybe I wasn't ready, maybe I was discouraged at the prospects, who knows. At this point my gut says ease in slowly but no commitments. First guy and I stayed friends and its getting a little complicated again. He understands where I am at. I am totally honest with him. I can't do anything serious now. My kids come first for now. Two and a half years out, I am still trying to find my way. I am not sure I really answered your question but wanted to share my experience. Everyone's journey is different and you may not know until you try. Hugs to you....

1. Took my kids to see a movie 2. Took my kids out to dinner after the movie 3. Sang and danced with my kids on the car ride home

Reality Show!!!!! You'd rake in the big bucks girl!! Who cares about the Kardasians, they have nothing on you girl!

Oh yes, sure get this! Had a medical test yesterday. They asked me married or single, no other choices. Single just did not sound right. Then I got asked for the dreaded emergency contact......sigh

Attraction is one part of a bigger package for me. It also does not necessarily mean model looks. It's that something that clicks when you meet someone. It's the initial reason you want to get to know someone more. It may not only be looks, but a smile, or their eyes, or the way they speak or look at you. It may not always be right away either, and it can grow. I think it's important because physical attraction makes us desire someone initially. But I also think that it is different for everyone and someone I find an attraction to, others may not. I think it goes beyond the surface to something more. Without that attraction, whatever it might be, I would not continue with someone.

Hi Michael, Belated Big Hugs for your 8 month sadiversary. I have not been too active here lately as I was finishing up a course. I didn't mean to intentionally ignore your new project. My voice in no way comes close to the other lovely ladies and thought I would leave it to them to make the song sound amazing. I am still tuning in to the station for your wise words.

I may have to fight Rob for the movie rights!!

No one. The the customs/immigration guys ask when you come in country to look for evidence of sex trafficking. It's a bigger problem than one might imagine. Mike Never thought of that Mike.......Scary

Thanks all. I don't usually like to blurt it out, but last week when we came back from our trip, the customs agent asked if I was related to my kids. I said yes. Then he asked where their father was. I almost said "He's Dead!" but because the kids were there, I looked him straight in the eye and said was deceased. ...He said "Oh." I knew this was a possibility but we have travelled a lot since and this was the first time anyone asked. You'd think they would ask when you are leaving the country in fear of kidnapping, not when you are coming home. Who steals their kids to come home?

Thanks BrokenHeart2. I had a magazine and was trying to look like I wanted to read it but she kept talking......sigh She was nice but I just was not in the mood to talk about it and she wasn't getting the hint. I can believe the minister talked about 50 years ago. ...sheesh!

My husband was killed in a work accident, public and on the news, 2 1/2 years ago. Today there was a different industry work accident where 2 men died. All over the news, showing the scene, grieving coworkers, aerial shots etc. It triggered all my horrible feeling of that day with similar images. Why do the news have to show so much? In our case they even showed the tarp he was under. Tonight at my younger daughter's soccer another mom started up a conversation with me. Thought she knew me from playing soccer with her, no. Asked if my husband played, I just said no. She kept asking questions and I talked about all the juggling with all 3 kids playing. She asked if my husband watches them play. I gave in and told her. She kept asking questions, was he ill etc. I told her he was killed at work and she kept asking if the kids were OK. She told me her mom died when she was 11 and was tearing up. I've never even met her before. She was nice and well meaning I guess but I just didn't want to get into it. Then my older daughter's old coach was there, he always gives me the I'm so sorry face, even when I greet him happily .....I hate that look people give you.....

Just found out at practice tonight that the NY state tournament is around end July...... Still need to get all the details.

Could work. It depends on the soccer tournament schedule for my older daughter, which I don't have yet, as she joined a new team this year.

That date is good for me right now!

This could work, but the 13th is the day before my sadiversary. That day would not work for me because of family commitments. The 12th will probably be soccer weekend finales for my kids. The 19-20th is a soccer tournament for my daughter. The last September weekend would work better for me but please plan according to others, I don't want to mess up everyone's preferred plans as my September weekends are so busy.

Love these nonesuch! May he thinks you will pick him out this way at Timmy's! ;D

I want to send you some big hugs.... I sooo know how you are feeling, I lived almost exactly the same scenario. He was married late 30's, 2 young teens, very bad marriage, crazy ex. He is off work on disability due to an injury. He said and still says I was the best thing that ever happened to him, and he will wait as long as it takes. The passion and intimate connection was unreal. We had so many things in common. When we were together, it was like another world for me, but when we parted, reality set in again. My kids never knew, and I still think that they are not ready. The guilt was killing me. I put things on hold back in September. I was always honest and upfront about all my feelings and life. He always knew where I stood. I could not keep going with all the uncertainty. I didn't think it was fair to him. It would have been so much easier if he treated me poorly but he treated me like gold. I felt it was better to stop it before it would hurt him more. I was a year out when we met, maybe I was not ready. I really don't know. We have remained friends, but not sure this is a good idea. I saw him yesterday, he still wants to wait for me. I keep trying to convince him not to. He kissed me. I didn't fight it. I wanted to kiss him. I don't have a clue what I am doing or what I want. But I will not resume anything until or if I am sure, and I feel my kids will be more receptive to the idea of me dating. I told him this. I don't know, maybe he isn't the one for me. I keep thinking I'll know when it's the right one, and all will feel right, but will it? I just wish things were simpler, like when I met my DH and it just flowed into the right direction. I cannot begin to give you advise on what to do. I'm not even sure I'm making the right decisions for me. For me it came down to which choice would hurt him less in the long run. For now, I think I made the right decision. I just want to wish you the strength to do what you feel is right for you. Look deep in your heart an hopefully the answer is there.

Tonight I donated for 2 girls to play soccer, who can't afford it, at my daughter's soccer club.

Me too......2 1/2 years out. I could also have written your post, word for word except for the timeframe, except that we are going with another family, (2 parent though), which I am worried will make my husband's absence even harder than it already is. We travelled last summer on our own and even though we enjoyed ourselves, it was bittersweet for me. I'm not sure this feeling will really ever go away.

I posted this on ywbb on Dec 28, 2014 Another member added some hilarious explanations but I won't add her post without her permission. ----------------------------------------------------------- I have hidden my profile and have no more interest in pursuing on line dating right now. The list below might give a clue why. Then I thought this might get some attention. It's a spin off of my actual profile. 12 reasons why you should NOT get to know me.... 1. You send me a message with one word....I know how to read more than one word. 2. You have multiple pictures in your profile holding fish....I like to eat fish but don't care how many you have held. 3. Your profile pictures do not contain one with a smile on your face...I would like to date a happier person. 4. Your profile states you want a woman 25-35 years old and you are over 50......I know that with age comes so much more, use your imagination. 5. Your pictures only show you wearing sports gear, ski suits, scuba suits, hockey gear, bike helmets and goggles.... I wonder who is really under there. 6. You are only shown wearing sunglasses..... I wonder what you are hiding. 7. You fav me, wink at me, like my pictures and then immediately hide your profile.......I wonder why you bother. 8. You say you are easy going, fun, like to spend time with friends, and love your kids....I wonder why you need to point these things out. 9. You have 2 profiles up with different ages and locations but the same profile picture......I am not stupid. 10. You take selfies in the bathroom.... I am surprised that you didn't clean the bathroom first. 11. Your pictures are with a group of people......I don't know which one you are. 12. You don't reply to nice messages that clearly show I read your profile, even if to say "sorry not interested".... I do respond to messages like this. .................................. Feel free to add your own to this list!!! -------------------------------------------------------------- I'll add number 13..... 13. You are young enough to be my son.......is your father single?

Here are a couple..... 22 year old trying to woo me, I was 48 at the time. I told him I was old enough to be his mother. He told me if I was his mother he would be more beautiful. A guy's first message was to tell me he wanted to put something in me (it was graphic). I responded back with.."does this line actually work for you?" He replied "sometimes".

^^^ LOVE this! I laughed so hard, my stomach hurts. ;D This was joking I am sure but I have received the following as a first message on a dating site...... "I love your hair! I would love to shampoo it for you." And no, I did not respond!

Agreed MrsK

Not sure about this for me Rob, I prefer to learn at least a little about someone before being asked to meet. Even just a few messages are fine. If the first message offers up a phone number, I run.