rooshy

And I love this one too from Stephen Sondheim. I am a film and theater geek 8)

I love these songs: The Cult, She Sells Sanctuary and Love Removal Machine anything form Led Zeppelin My current favorite is a channel on YouTube called Puddles Pity Party. Puddles is a 6'8" singing clown who has covered Johnny Cash, Pink Floyd, David Bowie and Chris Cornell among others. He's got a wonderful voice - he's a trained opera singer. Here's a sample:

My oldest son is 15 years old today and I was able to spend some time with him this morning before he jetted off for his friends :-\. Soon, I'm gonna blink, and DS will be out of high school and on his own. DS is thinking of enlisting with the Marines when he graduates high school. He keeps asking me if I've heard anything from DH's family regarding his birthday and it breaks my heart to say 'no' because they haven't contacted me about it at all. DH has been gone since January 2011 and my two sons are what's left of him, yet his family acts like we died with DH. This is not surprising to me (DH's family is very self-centered) but it's still upsetting to my two sons. I think that if I'd ever remarry, I would be okay with my sons taking my new husband's name. I really don't think that we have an obligation to them, anymore. Has anyone else run into this situation?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/beautiful-grief/201202/what-do-about-valentines-day I hope you enjoy the article. I have been a widda for six years and found the fifth year was the hardest. I expected myself to be remarried, or at least dating. Neither of those things have happened. I know that my Chapter 2 is out there...somewhere...it's just frustrating to me. So in the meantime, I'll take care of myself and my two sons.

Hey everyone! I had the oddest dream last night. It consisted of me on my wedding day, at my present age but DH was the groom. I'm at the church and ceremony but DH stands me up. I called him to ask about the no-show and he gives me a bullshit excuse, I knew in my dream that he didn't want to go through with the wedding/marriage. I was angry and hurt with him. DH has been dead for six years and I am ready to start dating again. I didn't eat anything too wild or spicy last night, either. ;D Interpretations, anyone?

Needytoo, The Fettucine Alfredo was awesome! I got a house salad with it too, just to even things out. I wanted to do things that day that I love. I got my haircut as well. DH never liked my hair cut short, but I do. Thanks for asking!

....I was sitting in the hospital cafeteria knowing that DH would be taken off life support later that afternoon. It was a Monday morning. My in-laws and I had just made that decision and my boys were at school. I could not believe that I was going to be widowed at age 34 with two sons aged 8 & 6. That shit just doesn't happen!, so I thought. I'd spoken with my boss the night before and my coworkers already knew what would happen. DH died from sepsis, a condition that I'd never heard of before 01-03-11, but I've made myself an expert since then. Those first few weeks I felt like I was staring into a black hole, I had no idea what I would do. Six years later, my boys are teenagers and they don't remember too much of their dad. My oldest son is 14, ready for high school ??? and thinking of entering the military when he graduates. My younger son is 12, autistic and non-verbal, and still making loads of progress towards independence. I'm learning to be comfortable with myself and not think that 'widow' is written across my forehead. Maybe I'll even date this year! Today I think I'll go and treat myself to some fettuccine alfredo

Hi Sdarah1130, That would be great to meet you and other Cleveland widows! Just let me know what you want to do. Rooshy

Are there any other wids here in the Columbus area? Maybe we can set up a dinner somewhere, like Carfagna's kitchen on Polaris? Or somewhere at Easton? I am in the northwest portion of Columbus, which has all of the traffic construction happening (I know, lucky me ). I am just throwing a suggestion out there.

I'm in the Columbus, Ohio area. sdarrah1130, I feel your pain with the Browns ;D I work with many Brownies fans here in C-bus!

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My MIL was supposed to join me and my two sons here at my house on Thursday but she changed her mind and will eat with my BIL and his wife on their farm - BIL's wife has a borderline personality disorder which she refuses to seek treatment. She's also extremely snarky and spoiled. Why does this make me mad? Let me explain. My BIL has a farm about an hour away and there is no wifi. My younger son is autistic and non-verbal and needs wifi to communicate. If there's no wifi, he gets frustrated with not being to communicate and has a tantrum, which involves head butting, scratching, and hair pulling all directed at me. I want to spend the holiday without a tantrum so we can't go to BIL's farm, and the in-laws know this. Not to mention that he and his wife's marriage is in the toilet, so there's a lot of tension. You can cut it with a knife when there. Even my older son, who is typical, does not like being there. MIL does not want to be there (has told me several times of her strong dislike for the wife) but she chooses to go there and 'support' BIL. Now, they've been married for 15 years and the wife acted like this while they were dating, so BIL knew what he was getting into. I understand that MIL wants to be there for BIL, but my boys are what's left of her younger son, and my in-laws tend to act like we died with DH. Thanks for reading my vent. Maybe this is the Lord's way of helping me move forward with my chapter 2? With the exception of MIL, my in-laws can be quite toxic.

Thanks all. I think that I'll take Mizpah's suggestion and start therapy. Those bad male relationships still haunt me at times and I need to know how to appropriately put their garbage out of my life before I can date again. The irony is that I work for behavioral health group but they specialize in Autism and ADHD. Portside, I did say smile and say hello to a few men at the grocery store this morning. They were all half my age (I am 40) but it's a start.

I sympathize with you Mrs Dan. DH's birthday was this past Friday, October 21st. We got married on December 12, 1998, he died on January 3rd, 2011 and of course the holidays. (((hugs)))

DH died in 2011 and this year has been remarkably hard coping with his passing. I don't know why. My kids are getting older - oldest will be starting high school next year, youngest will be in middle school next year, I am still single. I haven't managed to meet, much less date, any one. It seems like the phrase 'young widow' is plastered across my forehead. My family is starting to pressure me now and telling me to 'move forward with my life', i.e., date again. To be honest, I haven't had any good relationships with the men in my life - Dad was gone when I was 2, stepfather was a drug addict/alcoholic, and DH self-destructed with his depression. I am afraid to repeat the cycle, but how do I 'move forward'?

"Is your name Google? Cause you've got everything I'm searching for."

Has anyone here watched the movie Demolition with Jake Gyllenhaal? He plays a young widower who feels numb and tries to put his life back together by demolishing everything. I've seen the trailers and it looks like it might be very good, but might also be too close to home. I'm five and a half years out form DH's death but the year he died, I bought a small chainsaw to take down some dead bushes and it felt great to do so. It has also suck Heart's Crazy On You in my head. Here's the trailer:

I have gotten hooked on the show "Strange Inheritance" on Fox Business Network. It's about people who have, you guessed it, strange inheritances from a relative or friend. In honor of Prince, I was watching the Chapelle's Show skit in which Charlie Murphy played basketball with Prince, then ate pancakes with him. Still a funny show ten years after its ending.

Thanks for your advice because I got the job! I will be an 'outreach coordinator' working with the autism providers that work the kids in their homes and handling their billing. I'll have my own office with office supplies! My last employer took the term 'cheap' to a whole new level and the employees had to buy a lot of their own equipment. I just need to find an after school sitter for my own autistic son - placed an ad on care.com already - and start April 28th or 29th. I'm a little anxious but I know that I've got this This place is five minutes away from home and I will have the chance to work from home occasionally.

I was let go from my job last month (at a facility for kids and adolescents with autism), my boss scapegoated me for her mistakes and unfortunately upper management trusts her. Anyway, I have a second interview with my former employer's rival competitor and I really, really, really, want the job. The second interview is tomorrow morning. I am going to meet the people that I would be working with and the VP likes my background in health insurance and healthcare billing. My question is: What do I do? Should I bring my resume? I know that I can bring a lot to this new company but I'm just nervous. Thanks, Rooshy ;D

Soooo, I've been widowed for five years this month, I turned forty this week and I have my son's headcold. I stayed home from work today because I was very hoarse and just wanted some rest. After a couple hours, I got hungry and went to McDonalds. When I pulled for the food, the guy at the window (had to be 17-19 years old) tells me I'm beautiful and insists on my phone number. I said no, I'm much older than you, but he kept asking for the phone number. I didn't give it to him by the way, but it was nice to be hit on (I'm pretty sure that would have been illegal and just creepy). Apparently I don't need online dating sites, I just need to go to McDonald's!

Thanks for of your encouragement! On Friday afternoon, I and Jack's schoolteacher met with the latchkey staff, and I am pulling Jack out of the program. They made it clear that they would use any small thing to dismiss him from the latchkey. I don't want to give them that opportunity. Fortunately, the schoolteacher's aide (who has worked with Jack for a few years now) needs some extra income and will watch Jack before and after school for me. He had a great first day today. Also, when I was calling school transportation this morning for the change in pickup and drop off, my ceiling fan light turned itself on. I'd like to think that it was DH telling me that things would be ok.

This is just a vent - don't mean to offend to anyone. My younger son Jack is autistic and non-verbal, and he attends a before and after school latchkey program. This week he's been suspended for acting out with the staff - scratching the arm of the head teacher and grabbing the arm of another teacher. I am worried that he'll be kicked out of the program. I work full time and can't pick him up unless I shorten my hours at my job. My boss won't be happy with that. I meet with the latchkey staff tomorrow afternoon, and I've left a voice mail for his caseworker at the county Developmental Disability office hoping to find out about a waiver for home aide to watch him while I'm at work. I also work at a school for kids and adolescents who have autism. They make Jack look like a walk in the park. Why do I have to be the young widow? Why do I have to be the single parent of a special needs child? I didn't choose this, I sure as hell didn't ask for this situation. I wish I could find a legitimate work at home job so this BS would't happen. I get so tired of seeing the happy families while thinking "DH could have gone to the doctor, he'd still be alive today" - DH died of sepsis caused from an infection that he left untreated. ***whining is over***

Thank you all for your help! Last night was very quiet and hopefully tonight will be the same. I didn't think that maybe our energy might have been the cause, but the light that DH turns on is the same one that he fretted over in life. It's a ceiling fan with a remote control light that he was convinced was going to fall out from the ceiling. Six years later I think that maybe DH knew that I've been worried about our younger son (he's autistic and non-verbal, what's his future) and I was pretty anxious over being a single parent. I've been at this single parent thing for 4.5 years and I still have moments where I don't think I can do it. Maybe he was trying to comfort me. I spoke to him last night, trying to encourage to cross him over and if he wants to help, he should be with our older son at his new school. Today was their first day of school and he was a bundle of nerves! Mom's almost moved in with her things. The two of them - DH and Mom - did not get along when he was alive, but she deserves a lot of credit for stepping up and helping me out after his passing.

So very sorry to hear about this.