Momtojandj

Jules .. holy moly . Glad you found out at home , but that's so insane . What an a@@hole!

Thank you all for your opinions.. it's funny when each guy told me about ditching the date in the parking lot.. I didn't think about it , until later . Then Honestly I was mad , and felt so bad for these girls. Just goes to show you how bad online is , it's all about the visual and not the person . If it happens to me again where a guy tells me he did that, I'm going to walk out see how he likes it. I don't want to date someone that's that shallow anyway .

My two cents , it looks like you were looking for sex from him not dating . I would let it go. I honestly believe if a guy is interested , he will pursue .

I'm interested in opinions here .. two different guys , which I happened to go out with both twice , then one faded away and second I got it's not you , it's me speech . However , first guy told me about a date he had where he met the lady outside and she was heavy and walked with a limp . So he said I'm sorry this isn't going to work . So the lady left . Second guy told me about a date , met lady in parking lot and started walking in together to restaurant and had orange skin from fake tan and a mole on her face, so he told her he wasn't interested in continuing date, lady was annoyed but left . So my question , would you do that ? Have you ever ? I get there has to be attraction .. but I always go thru with the date , personality sometimes can win over a not great looking person . Then I'm also thinking those guys were so shallow they didn't even give those ladies a chance, I should've run from each of them .

On match..... guy checks my profile , sends me an email says your profile is awesome , would love to chat . Tell me three of your favorite shows right now. I answer . He reads my messsage , rechecks my profile and doesn't answer . It's gotten so absurd , it's funny anymore .

Maureen, your post made me cry . I remember when your husband died, how incredibly sad it was and you just seem to radiate strength . To become a widow a second time, so unbelievable. I've followed along with your posts, I feel like in an odd way I know you, although we have never met . I hope one day to meet you, give you a widda hug . Your strength and courage inspires me . I wish you the best in moving and starting again . Thank you for always being so open with us . Renee

Never leave your iPad out when you have friends over . Woke up this am to quite a few matches from online that I didn't do . Quite funny , maybe they can pick better than I . Lol

I'm sorry this will be long , hopefully not rambling .. Somewhat of a back story ... my mom had a massive stroke about 9 years ago, recovered to a new normal then died 2 years later of a heart attack. Those two things sent me into anxiety and depression . Something scary and I had never dealt with before. My husband tried to help, he didn't understand what I was going through . I was put on medicine and went to see someone . However after about a year and a half , I felt ashamed and embarrassed almost , that there was something wrong with me . With my doctors help , I tapered off and stop taking anything . Then my world as I knew totally changed , my husband was killed and I was in shock, depression , anxiety .. you name it. Went back to the doctor and back on medicine . This time , I saw a different doctor and realized there's no shame in needing help . So here I am now , it will be five years in October. Maybe it's that , or that both my kids are driving , college , graduating , dating sucks...I've been in a bad funk , depressed . Just off . I found an article , and actually shared it on my Facebook. The short version of the article is happiness is a journey , not a destination. We don't need to wait to get married, have a baby , get a new job, take a vacation to say Oo I'll be happy then. We need to focus on something small in every day to be happy . So far , for me it's working . As soon as my mind goes to a dark place , I quickly replace it with something happy. This is huge for me , I've for a long time said well if only ... I would be happy. For me also , this isn't about being grateful, trust me I'm very grateful for my family , kids , friends etc. this is about being happy . And realizing that getting a boyfriend , new job won't make me happy . I need to be happy everyday . I needed to say this, or just write this out. Thanks for reading this far . I still plan to make sure my medicine is ok and not needing adjustment , and I also realize like anything "wrong " I shouldn't be embarrassed to need help , medicine or a therapist.

Has anyone seen the new show on NBC , called first dates ? I decided to watch it last night and it is cute . Actually was interesting to see what they talk about and things maybe they shouldn't lol.

So I've decided to take a self imposed break from all online. My self esteem sadly keeps taking a beating on there. The amount of dates I've gone on and that they guy flakes or no interest, has been too much. I know the odds of meeting someone in the real world is tough, but I need to regroup and maybe put my toes back in online at some point . However I have thought to post on Facebook , offering a reward for getting introduced to someone nonmarried, non psycho and interesting .

Momtokam, Good luck on date two... I was curious so I downloaded bumble... I don't understand it yet .. but I'll try lol

It's happened again . Date the other night , awesome time , chemistry. He reached out , scheduled date for yesterday but then called to change to today , he had his son last night . Then I get a text this am ... hey there , I forgot I promised to do something with my mom . So sorry . I swear I give ...this was the second time from online that something like this happened . I don't usually have good first online dates ,when I meet people in real life , I have managed to date them. Online ? I give ! Very very sad , it shouldn't be this hard.

Ok.. my report .. dinner , and he paid when I went to the bathroom. Wasn't sure if he liked me during dinner, until he asked if I wanted to go for a walk . Yes please :-) . Walked and then sat in my car and talked for hours it seemed . He mentioned when he has interest , he doesn't keep looking and focuses on that one person. And if it's ok , he would like to do that . I said I'm on board . I'm not a fan of multi dating . Left with a hug , was bummed no kiss. However received a text that said , he felt awkward and got shy so just hugged me . Ok then ... overall good date , def want to go out again . Yay !

Momtokam Good for you ! Report back on your dates ! I have a date with him tonight at 5. We have been chatting on the phone, so far so good. So we will see tonight :-)

Ok, took both your advice and sent a quick text , he had told me about a date he went on and the girl had black lip liner and no lipstick ... So I sent a text and said .. I went and bought some black lip liner .. we shall see now ... thanks

Arenal but we already talked on phone last night. So first call out of way . Tonight is just a follow up to plan something for tomorrow.

Let's play a game .. backstory .. was on ok Cupid last night . Clicked on a profile of a guy I knew, he messaged me and said hey I know you . I responded I know you . He is a dad of a baseball player in our town, and I've seen him before at the fields . So we messaged for awhile , then decided to chat on the phone. Had never talked to him before in real life, so was pleasantly surprised how easy it was to talk with him. He asked if I'd like to go out Wednesday night. He said he would reach out today to finalize , also threw on or I could call him. ( which I don't and won't , at least in beginning if your interested I feel guys place to do that ) So the game is , it's 8pm .. will he call ? Text ? None of the above , flake and blow off the whole thing . What do we think ? Lol

Such a fear of mine , my boys were 12 and 14 when he died. Yes older than some in our widda group. But still a fear , I don't want them to forget him .

I noticed some things recently on match and plenty of fish .. So,. when the picture comes up it will say Bobprofile , 54. So now you click on it and it says Hi my name is Bob and I'm 49. So what I find funny is you have been on so long when you wrote your profile , the dating site kept up with your current age but you can't edit your profile to say hi I'm bob and I'm 54. .? Other thing I find funny is the guys on plenty of fish can't spell the town they live in correctly , I'm talking butchering it so I have to think oo you mean xyz? Then on match you get I live in (just an example ) .. New York City , but looking for someone 10 miles from Orlando Florida . Ok huh?? Glad I find humor in this ..

Hugs to still ... I hear you , you are not alone .

We were predicted to get 12-18 at one point. Then they lowered it, closed schools last night . We got ..... rain ... rain and more rain ! I'm in ocean county NJ .

Four plus years since hubby died. At first I went on a painting spree , mostly to keep busy . Family room was brought up to code and fixed . Now kitchen is being redone. Some of the reasons I've done work to house is because it really needed to be brought up to date , and I needed to have projects . I had thought of moving , but with housing market not great , I'm hoping investing money in the house will pay off in long run. It is bittersweet , the house looks nothing like it did when hubby was alive , but it's a new start I guess for the house and me .

Maureen , Chills reading that! Congrats . Thank you for always being so open , and sharing your story . I wish nothing but the best is your home search and job .

Omg ! I needed to hear happy news today ! Much love and congrats . Can we get a pic from the wedding ??

So , my husband was into antiques . We have a Victorla , sewing machine , depression glasses.. you get the idea. I am not really into them . They also no longer "fit" in my decor. I don't have a huge house and currently redoing rooms . So do I continue to hold on to them because of him? Sell ? Curious what other people have done. Mind you, it's more than furniture .. stamps , coins .. those are easy to store and pass to my kids at some point .