stolendance

I am at 7 months and I think the pain changes... and becomes bearable. I think eventually you come to peace like they have... I am unsure when that happens as I know it hasn't happened for myself yet. Take care of yourself! Live life for you both! Thats what I am trying to do and it seems to help. I agree with Kater...journaling and resource books have helped me; as well as exercise. I hope it gets better soon for you.

My suggestion is move... follow what feels right! I would have never moved but the husband wanted to...He ended up passing away here only 1 year after we lived. I can't see myself returning to our home city. I like the idea of being able to tell people what I want... Explore new things... think of the memories only when I want and also tell people ONLY what I want to share...its helped me with my grieving definately. Best of luck with what you decide!

Hi Jazzy, I am also a young widow and not yet at 4 months. I wish I could tell you it gets better or easier but I don't know if it does. I think it gets different and sometimes feels like it gets harder. Some things that have helped me is journaling and exercising. I think doing those things for yourself can make a big difference because they will make you feel stronger. I have learned friends and family won't understand what you feel or be able to always help you so you have to try to help yourself. Cherish the memories! They are something that no one can take from you.

Fuck loneliness. We didn't sign up for this and it sucks.

Its funny my widow experience has become a crumbling castle as the months go on... My husband and I were together 11 years... married 7. He was my first everything, my world and my best friend. Moved out of my parents house my wedding night, taught me how to clean, cook...He was my hero! I am now running his business that he was very successful at but he always included me in! He was my world, my hero and my best friend. I watched him die twice.... Cardiac arrest because of medical complications. They pronounced him dead the first time.. but some how revived him after 15 minutes... then I had to make the choice for his future because the brain damage was soo bad. Today is the 3 month anniversary of his second/'real' death and its getting harder each time. Its funny who doesn't care or remember anymore...I mean some people cared soo much to be friends with the husband when alive, to pulled away when he passed, to barely cared when the funeral and media were done their thing, to now 3 months.. very few care or even remember the anniversary... I hope its because they just can't relate or understand but it hurts. Any tips on how to cope with the anniversaires? Month 1 was actually easiest... Probably the widows fog. Month 3 the worst. I think month 4 I will hide.

Kiss him, hear him laugh. Tell him I love him and am so proud to be his wife.

When I journal I sometimes make a list of what I have learned as a widow.. I think most points I have relate her: -I never really had a filter now I definitely don't and it kinda feels good..... Example someone told me they thought it was a bit early to be dating and I said "unless your walking in my shows I don't think you get an opinion". They were speechless. -I have to stop myself from glaring at couples that grocery shop. I think its because my husband always joked about couples that grocery shop and now it just pisses me off... -I hate the feeling of how some things in the past were signs of the future.... 1. We just bought a place close to our cities main hospital. The entire summer I always looked at the hospital and thought of it as the ugliest building I had ever seen....I even mentioned it to him numerous times. Little did I know he would die there in the fall. 2. Two psychics during the duration of our marriage told me I would be a widow. It pissed me off then and really makes me mad now. 3. This isn't something from the past but just kinda a funny way of how the unknown works but occurs for a reason... An ex boyfriend who my husband never really liked & showed up at my husbands memorial (the husband would have been mad)... got remarried the day my husband died. My therapist says thats someone ensure we never reconnect. I think its funny.

I am a recent widow a month and a bit. I am also 30 years old and my husband was 32 it is said we our fortunate we don?t have kids and maybe that?s true but we were going to start a family and that has been taken from me. His passing was completely unexpected and due to medical complications in the hospital. I am also new to the city we live in for only a year. It can be hard but I am happy to have a new city to hide out in as our old city now feels so small with how fast the news of his passing spread. I have had to stop my ambitions to ensure his continue as they were our livelihood. I am angry at him because he could have prevented his initial hospital visit and this has changed our life plan. But honestly everyday is a bit of an emotional roller coaster. I feel very luck and happy to have found this site.