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Needytoo
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The last three weeks have been extremely stressful.  The job I was doing for the last 4 years on a contract basis at the college was finally posted. Which is great but if I didn't get the job then that meant I didn't have any job.  So here I am working on another three week contract waiting and waiting for the interview.  I was doing all I could to keep calm but I still couldn't sleep very well.  On Thursday I had the interview and HR told me it would take them another week to decide and that they couldn't extend my contract.  I asked my supervisor what do I do about next week do I just come in and fake it.  He said yes.  Yesterday right before leaving I got a call from my supervisor to come to his office.  I got the job and I also got a whole bunch of teaching hours.  For the next four months I will have no life but I have a permanent job. 

 

Right after the news you would think I would be over the top with happiness but I was just so mentally exhausted I felt nothing till my drive home.  Then I was totally over whelmed.  I went back to school so my family could have a better life that my husband could stop driving truck and get back into sales something he loved.  But guess that isn't going to happen.  I got my dream and he didn't.  I cried all the way home. 

 

I slept for 11 hours and still feel a little tired. Hoping the coffee starts to do its job.  I got my dream job I did it because of my husband.  He worked so hard for me to go back to school we sacrificed so much.  Dammit I need more coffee and I need to stop crying and just be happy.  I have wanted this for so long. 

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I am so glad you got the job!  So much of this life is bittersweet, isn't it?  I'm in school and changing careers because of the opportunity afforded when I met John, my second husband.  But....he isn't here to see me through it, either.

 

Hugs...and more sleep.  And just remember that semesters come to an end and there is a break in the intensity.  (That is what I have to tell myself!)

 

Maureen

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Congratulations! I could see all along how stressful this was for you.

 

Right after the news you would think I would be over the top with happiness but I was just so mentally exhausted I felt nothing till my drive home.  Then I was totally over whelmed.  I went back to school so my family could have a better life that my husband could stop driving truck and get back into sales something he loved.  But guess that isn't going to happen.  I got my dream and he didn't.  I cried all the way home. 

 

I slept for 11 hours and still feel a little tired. Hoping the coffee starts to do its job.  I got my dream job I did it because of my husband.  He worked so hard for me to go back to school we sacrificed so much.  Dammit I need more coffee and I need to stop crying and just be happy.  I have wanted this for so long.

 

I don't blame you for feeling exhausted. It is disgraceful to subject an employee to such a charade for the sake of keeping her current job. It's even more offensive when one considers that you lost your husband recently.

 

So, again - congratulations! I hope you don't experience this level of BS again for a long time.

 

|+|  M a r k  |+|

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Congrats on the job.  You've just been through an exhausting process and now it is time to rest.  Sorry your #1 supporter is not there to share it with you.  Preparation is the key to most successes in life and you have proven it true again.   

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Yesterday after 5 coffees and taking 4 advils I started to feel human again. The exact same grief triggers switched to gratitude and it felt great.  The stress that contract work has given has  been lifted off my shoulders.  I have my job that should get me to retirement.  It was a long road but I got it. 

 

Good luck to you Maureen.  I was 42 years old when I went back to school and I wish I went back years ago.  Guess I made an impression since I did get hired for the contract work.  It is going to be a hard semester but I think mentally I am ready for it.  I also told the research department I would be the lead of 3 projects that might have to wait. 

 

Thank you to everyone else for your kind words. It does mean a lot.  The response from work colleagues also has been amazing.  It fills my heart. 

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