Comin up to 10 years

[CarlyM]

Hi all,

 

I haven't been here for a while, and when I thought I needed to I headed to ywbb to find it had gone!!!!!  So thankful that you have set this up instead.  It was truly a lifeline back in 2006 and now I am so glad to have this to come back to .  Thank you.

 

10 years on xmas day.  Its crept up slowly all year, but with the change in seasons and start of the holidays I honesty feel like I want to crawl up in a ball and go to sleep until January and in actual fact I may just give up for the day today and do just that.

 

I have a new partner, have moved overseas but still it has caught up with me in a way I had forgotten it could.  10 years is significant it seems. We are away for xmas, I couldn't really bare being at home, but I am not sure how to commemorate it, I am writing a blog post ( I have no blog as yet) in word, but not sure if I'll have the courage to share.

 

Exhausting!

Cxx

[Wheelerswife]

Ten years sounds like a lifetime, yet there are moments it feels like yesterday?  I imagine you and your life are in completely different places than they were 10 years ago, yet part of you longs for the life you once had?

 

I'm sorry that you have such difficult memories about a day that should be about joy, whether or not you celebrate religiously, or secularly, or just in the spirit of peace that x-mas tends to bring to the world, even to those who don't officially recognize a holiday.

 

Anniversaries are hard to commemorate.  Period.

 

Hugs...and I'm glad you came back to the fold.

 

Maureen

[Catnip]

My husband passed away the week before Christmas. It will be 9 years for me.

I'm still having a hard time with the Christmas joyful season. It's supposed to be about the birth of Christ, not the death of my husband.

I'm still working on separating that.

 

Peace to you as the holidays approach.

~Catnip

 

[CarlyM]

Thanks both.  i feel better for just giving up on today and not beating myself up...the waves still come right, just less frequently, but still with the same force...... :-\

[marian53]

I am with a new partner, moved away from my home with Peter - nine years New Year's Day 2016. Please don't beat yourslf up- I was watching a documentary on Jackie Kennedy- she said, years after JFK's death, " I survived". Only the widowed understand what she means.

xo Marian

[marian53]

Every year will always be significant for us. Every year, and always. I do get comfort in that.

Marian

 

The holiday widows- I think we will see a few more of us at this time of year.

 

[Forgottenwife]

...the waves still come right, just less frequently, but still with the same force...... :-\

 

Yes. Spoken so eloquently, when those waves still visit....its the same. I am glad you are resting and taking care of yourself. I have the occasional day where I just lie in bed and feel it. Be gentle with yourself. I haven't made it 10 years - yet I am thinking of you today and as your 10 years approaches.

[CarlyM]

Thank you @Forgottenwife, @marian53.  As always here it is nice to know I am not the only one...xx

[IfIonlycould]

Funny isn't it?  We can have a new partner, have a new address, seem to have "moved on" to those around us....and still.....

 

A decade has passed for you.  A decade.  I am at 7.5 years and it does not seem possible.  I too have a new partner, a "new life"....and yet.

 

You have a fellow wids "permission" to just try to slide through or hide from this holiday season....(((((HUGS))))) to you.

[marian53]

I am comforte when I read these words. It is also my birthday 12/23. So New Year's Day?it also happens to be my partner's only daughter's birthday. Yes, I so needed to read these words.

massive hugs and understanding to you all.