People are idiots and I am angry

[Nolagirl]

First, huge thanks to everybody who managed to open this side after Ywbb closed. It saved my life 7 years ago and as I move on with my life, and come here like once a year, I missed it being closed.

 

So, me and my three kids manage OK I guess. With the rest of my family overseas and my DH's family dead, I managed all the lonely Kindergarden graduations, birthdays and Christmases. Even went on a few dates but with having nobody to watch my kids it gets really expensive in babysitting fees. Friends? Oh yeah. If I come to their party or go for coffee with them. When I thought I needed a surgery and asked around who could watch the kids for a couple of days, they flat refused. Or when I got stranded with a broken car and I needed someone to pick up my kids from school - they had to go shopping, see their mom, do homework with their kids. Oh, and the 40th birthday I celebrated alone because they were too busy.  So yeah, I got friends. Just none that would be willing to help me when I really need it.

But why I am mad: I get taken advantage of because I am single mom and my kids are paying the price and it makes me really mad. From handymen doing the shitties work possible, to service men constantly asking me if they can talk to my husband because I don't have the brain cells to understand why the dishwasher leaked. To fathers pushing their kids in front of mine at events because they can and my kids than looking like someone stole a candy from them. To all three homeroom teachers complaining that I am not raising my kids well and that I need to pay more attention to them (yeah, news flash - there is only 24 hours, work to go to, house to take care of, homework to do and no, i can't take a day and spend it with my child - you know, I got two more, what should I do with them?). Or the fact that my son has never had any dad, nobody was ever willing to take this child and show him how to be a boy and now, at 9, he is kinda messed up. All the Boy Scout meetings with all the dads...and me. All the soccer practices with all the proud dads and me and my two young daughters. They all feel sorry for me but when it comes to it, they all take care of their families and I and my kids are left out in the cold.

And I realize it's not other people's responsibilities to raise my family but I am really mad at my DH who put us in this situation. Who made my children to be from a single parent family, envying all the other kids who had fathers, and wishing nothing more than having one too.

It was long, I know but nobody else would get this but people here.

[canadiangirl]

I get it.  I certainly get the anger and the feeling of being treated differently, and not good-differently.  I also get the envy.  I am so sorry you are in this position, you and your kids, and that you have the support of neither friends nor family.  I can take being alone but it sucks that my child will not know what it is like to have a dad -that is what makes me angry.  We can only do the best we can at any given moment. I am glad you found this site and this community again - it was Jess and Justin and Lewis and some of the other mods who stood up this site- I too will always be grateful.  Seven years- (((nolagirl)))

[Mizpah]

"It takes a village," and your village has totally failed you.  I'm so sorry.  I would be angry too.  And for what it's worth: F these A-holes!  You're doing a great job under the worst circumstances.  They should be in awe of you, not criticizing.  I'd like to see any of them do what you've done with what you've been given. 

[sojourner]

"... You're doing a great job under the worst circumstances.  They should be in awe of you, not criticizing.  I'd like to see any of them do what you've done with what you've been given.

 

I agree. I have very little community support myself; my kids are older at least, but it's still hard for all of us.