In a funk - depressed - how dare people

[Eddienhp]

I am not in a good mood at all lately. Major work deadline. Ongoing school issues with my special needs son. People asking me to discount my fees. Those fees are what I use to support my two kids. Ironically the people who are questioning are those who are financially comfortable. How dare they? It pisses me off. I'd like to tell all of them to f--k off. Yet I have to be nice until they pay me what they owe. It's amazing they don't see the struggle I live with. They don't care, it doesn't affect them. The result is I am getting cranky, short tempered and even depressed. Can you give me a family discount? Please don't charge me too much, I don't have money. Really?? You spend $275 on a pair of jeans, $100 on a sweater, have your nails done, go on vacation, eat out constantly, etc. I shop in thrift stores, never take vacation, never eat out in restaurants, and look everywhere to save a buck. They know it takes two incomes to survive where I live. I am trapped, I can't move. My son needs the services. I am so sick of selfish people. I am looking into a new business venture. I hope it will be successful so I can leave these time sucking, attention seeking, selfish people behind.

 

Yesterday was autism awareness. Most people were wishing happy autism day. I was not happy. Its a sad day for me. It's a reminder of my son's struggles and how hard I have to fight to get services and supports he deserves. The struggle continues no matter how many advocates I have on board. Sorry, but I don't feel like celebrating autism awareness day.

 

This life sucks today. I bear too many challenges for one person to handle. End rant.

Eileen

 

 

[BrokenHeart2]

Rant away Eileen!  That's what we're here for! I'm sorry you have to deal with all of that. 

Best of luck with your new business venture!!

Big hugs.

[SoVerySad]

Eileen, I'm sending you tight hugs. It is a lot to try to do all this as a solo parent. I also don't understand wanting to "celebrate" Autism Awareness Day. I love my son who is on the spectrum immensely, every unique part of him. I am his advocate, his protector, his greatest fan. But I wish he didn't have it. His childhood years were very hard on the whole family. The fighting/advocating with the school is continuing and he will be a senior next year. Watching him struggle to make friends has been heartbreaking for me and I no longer have my spouse to talk with about it and share my hurt. I have no idea what the future will hold for him and thus for me as well.

 

I, too, hope your new venture will bring you some deserved relief. This is a hard life and it does suck in many ways. I'm glad you took a few minutes to vent with us and let it out a little.

 

Sending you love and tight hugs...

[Captains wife]

That is far too much to deal with. Sending best wishes...

[Trying]

I have an issue with the idea that those of us who are faced with a struggle, the type that is long term and permanent, are supposed to rise above and be heroic without ever complaining or feeling exhausted or defeated.  Your son's autism is not something to be celebrated but a chance for the rest of us to be reminded of his struggle and the struggle you face every day.  It should be a reminder to the people in your life that you may need a hand or an ear or just a distraction once in a while. Are you involved with any autism groups for parents? I know several families who have suffered through divorce, one who also lost a sibling of the child with autism to cancer and are divorcing.  I can't relate to being a solo parent of a child with autism but I know you are not alone and hope you have support from people who totally get it.

 

I wish you all the best with the new business venture!