When panic sets in (hope you'll laugh with me!)

[arneal]

So I decided to try online dating. I'd never considered doing such a thing before, but realized being alone was not for me. I joined a few of the larger sites for free as well as some lesser known ones. I was copying and pasting profiles all over the place 

 

I got a message from a guy on one site and was intrigued enough to pay for a month's service (it was one of those that limited your functionality if you had a free account). We've been talking and texting ever since.

 

We are both feeling quite a bit of attraction and all of a sudden he's talking real serious ... like marriage type stuff. And you guessed it: I've panicked!

 

Has anyone else been through this? I'd love to hear the good, bad, and otherwise  :-[

[serpico]

I think in this situation you SHOULD panic.  I'm not saying you should run for the hills, but this fella needs to pump the brakes a little bit.

[arneal]

Yeah, I thought so as well. I have said as much There are those stories out there, though ... I guess it's one of those things of erring on the side of caution combined with wanting a happily ever after 

[Mizpah]

We've been talking and texting ever since.

 

We are both feeling quite a bit of attraction and all of a sudden he's talking real serious ... like marriage type stuff.

 

Have you met this person?  If not, I think this is madness.  Even feeling attraction in the absence of meeting - what does it mean?  I'm not saying you can't be attracted to someone's mind, but....

 

I say meet this person ASAP, and be cautious.  "Talk is cheap," especially when facing a menu of potential mates, from the safety of behind a computer/phone. 

[arneal]

That is true. It's been video since we are at a distance. Still planning the in-person. Let me clarify -- I don't mean like 'Hey, let's get married right now' ... I mean just exploring the conversation, like would I consider it in future.

 

Sorry if I caused more panic with my panic!

[Captains wife]

Its nice that you found a connection but I would proceed with caution. While online dating has its positives (I met my LH online on Match!) and I have used it since, I would be generally wary of anyone getting into any type of serious relationship talk too fast, especially if you haven't met in person. It could be this guy is a "relationship" guy so some guys move faster than others (and it could be that he has honorable intentions), especially if they meet someone they like. But protect yourself too ! Remember it does tend to be all roses at the beginning but its important to take time to get to know someone. But in the meantime, have fun !!

[arneal]

Great points, Captain's Wife! I tend toward cautious and have my 'sisters in arms' looking out for me. Thank you for mentioning the 'relationship' guy -- from our conversations I get the impression he is one of those. He is also a widower (longer than I) and I think he's looking for serious. I don't have a problem with that. The more I read here and elsewhere, there is that notion of looking for the hook-up and looking for the serious, so knowing where he's coming from is good as well.