These things

[MrsDan]

My boyfriend and I both wear glasses. Mine are new, and he's always reminding me to clean them with cotton cloth so they don't get scratched up. He'll often playfully chide me when I clean them with my shirt if it's not cotton. Anyway, last week we were sitting together at a concert, listening to some music. My glasses were dirty, and I took them off. He reached over and took them from me, and cleaned them with his T-shirt and then handed them back to me.

 

These kinds of things, these small gestures are what I really missed, these are the things, so indescribable that are impossible to convey to other people that you lose when being widowed. And these are the things that make you feel like you're with the right person, and that you're loved. At least, that's how it is for me.

[Guest TooSoon]

The first time Andy made me a cup of coffee in the morning, I nearly burst into tears, it was so, so, so nice. 

[Bunny]

Yes. Absolutely. These things intoxicate me now- I don't think I've cried with happiness in my whole life as much as I have in the last two years over little things like that.

 

...for some reason, this post is reminding me of one you made on the ywbb, one that moved me so much that I printed it out and put it on my fridge- about Dan clipping his toenails in the bathroom.

[Wheelerswife]

With Barry, it was just his touch on my arm. He was incredibly weak in his muscles, yet I was very sensitive to his light touch. The gestures that made me feel loved by John...him reaching for my hand, or gentle kisses on my head. Touch has always been very important to me.

 

But other little things made me feel very loved by John, such as him lifting my suitcase for me when we traveled, or letting me have the bathroom first in the morning. It would be nice to have little gestures again.

 

Maureen

[Quiet Storm]

Mrs Dan- That is so sweet! There are so many little, unexpected things that I didn't know I missed. I don't mean gifts or flowers or acts of chivalry. I mean when my partner makes me drink a glass of water or eat a piece of fruit bc he knows I have forgotten to do such basic things. It feels nice to be cared for.

[Trying]

So many of those little things I took for granted with DH and then missed so much when he was gone.  I'm a terrible sleeper and always need to fall asleep with either the TV on or reading.  Every night he would take the book from hand or turn off the TV after I was asleep.

 

Now with NG I appreciate all of the little thing and try to make a point to tell him.  I've been so stressed out my mothers cancer diagnosis and pending surgery on Monday that I finally just crashed yesterday and fell asleep on the couch for 2 hours in the afternoon.  When I woke up he had hung up the flag I had bought and then cooked dinner.