Today I'm sucked dry

[Abitlost]

It has been more than a decade since DH got sick, at which time I became an extreme caregiver and the sole person responsible for our two kids. I give myself passing marks for raising generally well-adjusted and high-achieving kids (still a work in progress for a few more years). But it has sucked the life out of me. I have no energy left, no motivation to do things that need to be done that and will go undone if I don't do them. I'm not fun any longer. I'm tired. I'm drained. I'm weary.

 

I'm sad that my kids were cheated out of the joyful life they had until diagnosis. They don't remember that I was the mom that played in the playground, participated in games with them, made every Halloween costume, read to them endlessly. The mom they will remember and recount to their kids was always stressed, stretched, and out of sorts. 

 

I want a break, I need a break...but that break will never come.

 

abl

[rifatheroffour]

I completely understand and feel like I'm in the same boat.

 

I keep hoping though that the break will come someday...I have to keep that hope going or it will get ugly.

[Euf]

(((hugs)))

 

 

[CJF]

I can so relate.  Just remember you are doing the best you can with the hand you've been dealt.  That is all we can expect from ourselves.  Hugs. 

[trying2breathe]

abl  ((Big hugs)) and hope for some peaceful days ahead for you.

[Guest Lost35]

Weary enough to simply say,  "I hear you" instead of something uplifting and inspirational.  So many family-friendly holiday events that our little guy will not attend because even after all these years I still can't handle happy family get-together's. 

 

I do hear you.  Take care of yourself, sucked dry or otherwise,  you are doing the best you can and that is quite something! 

 

-L.

[sojourner]

I hear ya.