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torian
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Not sure if many here remember me, but I was on the old forums before they removed them - and I only now realized that this one got up and running in its place! I blame my widow brain (comes in handy sometimes!)

 

Anyway, the reason why I was seeking my wid friends out was that I have...gulp...news.

 

I have a boyfriend.

 

Wow...still feels weird to say that - in a good way - but still weird. Do you even call him a 'boyfriend' at our age? LOL.

 

He's amazing :). After a year's worth of crappy first dates, he showed up when I wasn't looking. Go figure!

 

I honestly thought I'd never find another man who could fit me the way DH did - he set the bar pretty damned high. But NG has. And I think if DH was still alive, he and NG would actually be friends (this isn't to try to dispel any guilt, because weirdly, I don't have any!). My kids like him, and he likes them, too. And he's incredibly supportive and understanding of my wid status.

 

I think the only issue I've had so far is the reentry of using the words, 'we', 'us', 'our' again after a long time of 'me', 'I', and 'my'. Getting used to the idea that there can be someone to rely on again (as much as one can, knowing that nothing is permanent).

 

LOL...now I'm babbling!

 

Anyway, will be looking to those who have gone before me to help navigate into my Ch2.

 

I still can't believe I get one.... :)

 

Tori

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Hi Torian! Of course I remember you. And, I could have basically written your post word for word - except I only dated a few months before I met NG. I too find the terms boyfriend and girlfriend weird at our age, especially after having been a wife and a widow. Last week he referred to himself as my boyfriend, then asked later if it was okay.

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Guest TooSoon

I just cannot say boyfriend.  Can't do it.  The first time I went through customs to go visit him in England, I didn't know his complete address to put on the form.  I was asked, "What are you here for?"  and I said, "To visit my significant other."  And the customs agent said, "How significant can he be if you don't even know his address?"  Uhhhhhhh???? (they let me in in the end).

Glad to hear things are going well, Tori! 

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Guest TooSoon

As a man, I would prefer to be called 'boyfriend' over 'New Guy' by a multiple of 100...

 

I like this more times than I can count.  I'm of a similar mind with "Chapter 2"  - this isn't my "Chapter 2"  this is just my life.  I'm pretty sure this is all just me being over-analytical and pedantic though. 

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I too only refer to him as NG here. In all honestly, while I feel he has graduated from NG status, I'm not sure we're at significant other yet either.  I also HATE chapter 2 and will never use it. That leaves boyfriend I guess, but NG is the common parlance around here. BF could also mean best friend. I could use N, the first initial of his name, but people who don't know me or about him might find that confusing.

 

Of course, this is our rodeo, right, so we could come up with something different altogether, right? I have a friend who years ago lived in a communal house where they called a meeting to address people using the word gay in a pejorative sense. People found it offensive, so they decided to come up with another word to use. They landed on Duplo. You know like the preschool legos? Because, they're like legos, but not really all that great. Instead of, "that's so gay," they'd say, "that's so Duplo." I'm not sure what we could use. GIS? (guy/girl I'm seeing)?

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