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My husband died 8 weeks ago tomorrow


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Now that life has settled back into a routine,  it hurts more that Donovan isn't here. I go to work,  come home, play with my dogs, and he isn't here. Life feels so flat and empty without him, he was my soul mate.

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It's been 11 weeks today for me.  I completely understand what you mean by "flat".  I don't feel like I am in any different of a place today than I was, say, 9 weeks ago (the first 2 weeks were a complete abyss).  I thought things were improving a bit but the last 3 days have been amongst my hardest for some reason.  I can laugh at lots of things.  I can still see humour.  But no joy.  I do have faith that this will work out.  I just don't see it yet.  Take care.

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I am so very sorry for the loss of your husband, Katy. What you are experiencing is normal for many widows unfortunately. It seems like at first you are in a protective fog and also busy with things to do. After a while, as the shock begins to wear off, it hurts more because you've had more time to process the many ways your life is different now. Please know we understand and are here to support you.

 

Sending you a hug...

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Welcome Katy and Kater. I am so sorry you have reason to be here but so glad you have found us. You are now a part of our community, which has a price of membership that is far too high, but under these circumstances is such a gift to me.

 

It is hard for me to really remember my life when so little time had passed. Most of it is blocked from the fog of shock that SVS mentioned. For that I am grateful because I do know the immense pain and confusion I had to somehow navigate through as I tried to also do mundane things like work, clean (well, not so much on the cleaning bit), eat and drink. I'm now almost 20 months out and to be honest, it still hurts. It always will, but I am better at living with it.

 

Hang in there. We are here to support you.

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People here can help during times you need some to vent to or just know what you are feeling is ok. Please take care of yourself as you start to heal. The scars will last a lifetime but this ovewhelming feeling of grief will slowly heal. I wish no one ever had to go through this pain.

Amor

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Katie & Kater, I'm so sorry for you both.  Life isn't fair.  I don't know why some people get lollipops and sunshine and others get stormy weather.  Just hold on ... I found praying, journaling, and being here  and reading what others wrote ... even if I didn't add anything, really helped.  When people offer help, take it! 

Wishing you both much happiness in your future.

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