What to do with old pictures and keepsakes

[thejourney]

I am conflicted about how to handle pictures and mementos from Chapter one. DW has no remaining family except our kids. How many pictures do they want of a grandma that they don't really remember?  How many pictures do they want of their mom when she was a kid?  I feel like I should just get rid of them, but it feels wrong - nobody is watching me or would know, but it doesn't seem right -- what have you all done?  I have four boxes of albums and framed pictures. some include me and or the kids but a lot do not. 

while I am asking, what do you do with all of your kids pictures. I have thousands that sit in a box ... keep thinking I will deal with it later, but later never comes.

 

[anniegirl]

I keep a lot of the pictures and a few tangible things but our daughter was three when he died. She didn't know him. My second husband has raised her and she considers him (and his family) to be hers. She has little interest (at nearly 13) in LH.

 

I am digitizing a lot of the photos and then get rid of them, but I am doing that with my own family photos too. You only need so many photo albums.

 

Husband's grown daughters have taken most of the mementos and photos that they want.

 

Things still clutter and even going on eight years together, we are still downsizing the remains of our late spouses possessions. it's hard to throw things away. It can be brutal to go through boxes that you haven't looked at since you boxed them up.

 

This is basically your call. What do you think your kids (unless they are old enough to help you) might like. Make digital copies of photos if you can. Keep only those items that are really special. And then get rid of the rest.

 

I wish someone had told me that I didn't need to methodically go through things. That it was okay to junk something because it was taking up space and it was more than likely that my daughter would also think that the item was junk that was taking up space when she was old enough to assess things (and for the record, she has. Nearly 100% of the time, she just goes "meh" and gives me this look of "why would you have ever though I wanted that?").

 

You don't have to do it all at once though I wish I'd just rented a big trash bin and done just that because I am not relishing the job at all now. Just use your best judgement and then don't worry about it. It's stuff. The real memories our in your head and heart and those are more important to your kids in the longer run anyway.

[klim]

A bit of a different situation but I think the same procedure could be applied to help reduce the overabundance of pictures.

I've always had trouble throwing out pictures.

My mother passed away last year and I,  ironically, was put in charge of going through the boxes and boxes of pictures she kept. I pared it down by choosing to keep only original/unique pictures capturing the essence of the different eras represented.The best of the best as they say.

Because I gave the pictures my attention and chose carefully i reduced the guilt of throwing away the rest.

I reduced 4 bins of albums to a small shoe box. Probably could do another round of paring it down but ....later.

[mokie]

I've been doing this just this last couple of weeks... 4 bins of pictures in frames that were hung on the wall at one time or another.  I took all the photos out of the frames and am giving them to my son and stepson.  Special keepsakes of LH's that I still have are going to the boys too (his son is graduating from high school next month, so it's a good time to give him the remainder of the things I've been saving for him).

 

We've also done some scanning and saving on CD's with special pictures.

 

I've seen what my mom has saved... She's downsized a couple of times since my dad died, but she still has one entire closet filled with things she never looks at, but just can't seem to part with. My siblings and I will have to deal with it all one day.  I don't want my son to have to do that with my stuff!

[MissinGrizz]

I made a special scrapbook for each kid.

[Guest tableforone]

I created large crates for his children. I held on to them until they were adults and their mother couldn't make them destroy them. I gave his son all his college year books...I figured he could decide whether he wanted to throw them out. Also, I gave them pictures. I wanted them to decide which ones they wanted. Personally, I still have many pictures of my mother as a child. I like them. I would keep them and let the kids decide when they are old enough. Also, I removed the pictures from the frames. The frames I sold at a yard sale.

 

For myself, I have most of my keepsakes in a large cedar chest my father built.

[Guest IronBear]

You can put out pictures without turning the house into a shrine to a dead spouse. 

[maddalena]

If someone gave me photo s of my deceased father I would be thrilled. Don't get rid of them. Grandma, not so much. Keep a few of her as well.

[Guest nonesuch]

I need to do this, too.  I think I may have to become very familiar with photoshop and my scanner.  That way, I can ditch an awful lot of stuff.

 

My Mom was at the house the day after Late Husband died.  She took with her a bunch of his clothes and made a rag quilt.  If you've never seen one or heard of it, it is much quicker and less tedious than a traditional quilt. I've also heard of having a teddy bear made from a special piece of clothing.

 

http://carolrainhagy.net/verynice/2010/04/10/flannel-and-denim-rag-quilt/  A quilter who was very good would be well within her rights to charge hundreds of dollars for a traditional quilt, but anyone who sews could made one of these. 

 

It got a pile of clothes out of the way, and I have a sturdy throw and pillow sham to keep forever.