I'm going to decorate for Christmas

[Trying]

This will be our 3rd Christmas without DH. The first two I hosted his whole family as I had done for 20 years even though the first was only 3 months after he died. This summer we moved into a smaller home and my sister in law moved into a very large beautiful home they built. I asked her if she would take over her family's holidays and she agreed it was her turn. She did thanksgiving but has pawned off Christmas on a cousin who lives an hour away and only wants to serve appetizers that we all will bring. I have 3 boys who can really eat who are not happy. New Guy was supposed to join us but is on call, SIL is in town but cousin is too far away from his job.  Now he will sit home alone.  I guess I will take back Christmas next year because this is making no one happy. I'm trying to get in the spirit, I've decorated the house and we will do the tree this weekend when oldest gets home from college. I would say listening to Christmas music is still hard and I can't get myself to send out cards still. Hopefully the new house and some new traditions will help all of us.

[gracelet]

I bawled my eyes out after putting up the Christmas tree.  It was down to one single ornament.  If you'd like to read, I wrote about it on my blog: http://eerilycheerily.com/2015/12/08/a-sausage-dog-made-me-cry-tonight/

 

I'm sure some of you with empathise.

 

Love and light to all of you who struggle in particular through this season.

 

Grace x

[Virgo]

Last year, our first Christmas without Phil, I decorated indoors and outdoors. I did it for my daughters. I wanted to keep with old traditions while adding new ones. This year I enjoyed decorating. I have a system down, so it doesn't take long. I just have a few more indoor decorations to finish up.

[IfIonlycould]

To those who are having troubles with decorating, as you can see we were all there at one time and it seems to be a very common theme which is why I started this thread.  I wanted to share how I evolved from hiding in a basement to finding the joy of the season again.  It is a process and one should do as much or as little as they are comfortable with each year.

On the old board I would write about the struggles each year and get the support I needed from my fellow wids...one year I even put everything up only to start uncontrollably bawling (grace) and take it all down.  We evolve, our habits change.... sometimes we reinvent and sometimes we go back to old traditions.  I say to all do as much or as little as you want....for me I feel blessed to have finally after 7.5 years to have turned the corner! Thanks always to my fellow wids for being here as I processed.

[Carey]

I STILL haven't done it

[Freelancing]

Good for you! We do things in our own time, not when others want us to.

 

Our Christmas tree stayed up 3yrs. The first year, the kids put the tree up with one commemorative ornament. Second year, they put lights on it and another commemorative ornament. Third year, they added a star and another commemorative ornament. In August of the following year they took it down, they were then ready to put it up every year and fully decorate it. They still have their moments when they handle Daddy's ornaments. It makes me smile to see their love for him is still alive, and they're no longer paralyzed with grief.

 

Happy Holidays!