WifeLess Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 In the early years of the old YWBB, members would sometimes cheer themselves and each other up during the Holidays by cleverly altering Christmas carols and other songs of the season to reflect their newly widowed status. This was accomplished primarily through the use of dark humor and sarcasm, of course. Below are 5 slightly edited offerings from those talented widows and widowers. Perhaps they will bring a few moments of amusement to Young Widow Forum members this Holiday Season. Please feel free to add any others you wish to this collection, including your own creations if so inspired. (To the tune of Winter Wonderland) Sleigh bells ring, why should I care? In my brain, it's a nightmare. A miserable sight, I'm lonely tonight, Walking in a Widow Netherland. Gone away is my happiness. Here to stay is the crappiness. We'll sing mournful blues, as we spread the news, We're walking in a Widow Netherland. In the meadow we can build a Bago And pretend that we are all onboard. DGI's will wonder where did they go When all their stupid comments are ignored. Later on we'll inspire (each other), As we dream by the fire To face unafraid, all our dreams betrayed, Walking in a Widow Netherland. (To the tune of Away in a Manger) I've spent all the money, My house is a mess. This pathetic widow, She has to confess. The kids are all grubby, Their homework's undone. But who will come help me? There's simply no one. My pets are all moaning, Yes they miss him too. Or have I not fed them Between my "boo hoo"s? Don't tell me its Christmas, It cant be again. It sucks to be widowed. Where is my husband? (To the tune of Oh Little Town of Bethlehem) Oh little town of Widowland How sad we see thee lie. Beneath the heavy weight of grief We know your people cry. Yet in the still of darkness There comes a ray of light. From all the healing power they've found By joining all their might. Oh, how we came to dwell in here The heavens won't reveal. While we seek answers to our prayers Each day seems so surreal. Please grant us strength to live and thrive In the altered reality, Where we are now abiding With hopes of serenity. (To the tune of God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen) The holidays are lousy when your husband is still dead, If one more DGI speaks up, I'll pummel him to shreds, I do not want to hear that I should just move on instead, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain, sadness and pain, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain. They seem to think they know it all and just how I should feel, If they must talk to me they all pretend it isn't real, They mostly run away and hide so they don't have to deal, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain, sadness and pain, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain. I'm tired of pretending there's no reason to complain, I wouldn't mind a phone call but they're all just so inane, I'm not as strong as you may think, despite your wishes plain, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain, sadness and pain, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain. Do not tell me it could be worse, or that you understand, Do not tell me to seize the day, or give a reprimand, Do not compare my life to yours and tell me mine is grand, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain, sadness and pain, Oh, tidings of sadness and pain. (To the tune of It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year ) It's the most horrible day of the year. Everyone is happy, Even mama and pappy, But not me, oh noooo. It's the most horrible day of the year. It's the most difficult day of the year. Last year was much better, I got a new sweater, And I was in loooove. It's the most difficult day of the year. There'll be Kleenex using, Photo albums perusing, And staring idly at the waaaall. There'll be difficult moments, While seeing the ornaments, Still boxed down the haaaall. It's finally the end of 2015. I hated this year, Daily shedding of tears. Grief has been like my waaaar. Love hurts, that's what I've learned, and much more. There is one blessing I discovered this year. I've faced the worst life can give me, My spouse would be proud of me, But this much I knoooow. I'll survive, thanks to all of you heeere!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sojourner Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 Thanks much! Now, there're some tunes I can identify with better. I'm someone who personally has deep faith in the spiritual reason for Christmas, but alllll this commercially manufactured "joy" grates on my nerves. Never been a huge fan, but at my second widow-Christmas out, if anything I tune out even more to the vast majority of what just seems like jarring noise to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 24, 2015 Author Share Posted December 24, 2015 sojourner, Glad you enjoyed, and I agree with you about all the commercialism and manufactured joy. I still recall my first Holiday Season as a widower, just a few months after losing my wife in August 2009. Weeks of Christmas music and ads, as well as partying and celebration all around. But it was a melancholy time for me. Fortunately, I had recently joined YWBB and found comfort in many of its writings, including the humorous songs and carols that appear above. Whether somber or comical, those posts by veteran and contemporary members helped me make it through. --- WifeLess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 Love these, WifeLess, thanks for posting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 26, 2015 Author Share Posted December 26, 2015 canadiangirl, Thanks for your post. I hope the above words of widows past have brought a bit of levity to all here who need it this Holiday Season. --- WifeLess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 20, 2016 Author Share Posted December 20, 2016 The Holiday Season can be an especially difficult time for widows and widowers. So for those in need of a laugh, I am bumping this up from last year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kjs1989 Posted December 20, 2016 Share Posted December 20, 2016 I would love to enclose a few of these in my Christmas cards in response to all the "my life is perfect" cards I get every year, but I don't think it would go over well. I can hear it now in fact: "Wow, she is still has so much grief anger... It's not healthy... She really should be moving on by now.... and yadda yadda yadda..." ;D 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth_krkswidow Posted December 20, 2016 Share Posted December 20, 2016 I would love to enclose a few of these in my Christmas cards in response to all the "my life is perfect" cards I get every year, but I don't think it would go over well. I can hear it now in fact: "Wow, she is still has so much grief anger... It's not healthy... She really should be moving on by now.... and yadda yadda yadda..." ;D Amen. LOVE Love Love these songs... thanks for posting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marjoe Posted December 20, 2016 Share Posted December 20, 2016 Wifeless - you have outdone yourself! Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cassandra Posted December 21, 2016 Share Posted December 21, 2016 Mine is really short . . . Time again for melancholy. Fa la la la la la la la! 'Tis the season to be jolly? Fa la la la la la la la! Drink some wine, by the barrel, Fa la la la la la la la! Can't stand to hear another Christmas carol, Fa la la la la la la la! Fa la la la la la la la fuck you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth_krkswidow Posted December 21, 2016 Share Posted December 21, 2016 People just don't understand. I have quoted these to people, and they just say, "Oh, that's so sad". Uh, have you MET me? Sad isn't even the tip of the iceberg! You want me to be JOLLY?! REally?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 22, 2016 Author Share Posted December 22, 2016 cassandra, That's the spirit! (Or lack thereof.) Nice job. Thank you for your contribution. --- WifeLess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marjoe Posted December 22, 2016 Share Posted December 22, 2016 Cassandra, sorry - but this made me laugh. Good one! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth_krkswidow Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 cassandra, That's the spirit! (Or lack thereof.) Nice job. Thank you for your contribution. --- WifeLess Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mbanyard Posted December 29, 2016 Share Posted December 29, 2016 These were very entertaining to read, thank you. They capture the essence of being a widow during "this season" when people, who normally don't get it (less face it!), don't get it even more. I have been basically alone for the past week, which I did for myself when I'd had just too many senseless comments made to me, just one too many people with their cheerful family photos and "look at us so happy together". (It was just easier then punching them all) Here is hoping that we all are able to find our way in 2017, for I cannot stay on this current path too much longer. MB Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth_krkswidow Posted January 3, 2017 Share Posted January 3, 2017 These were very entertaining to read, thank you. They capture the essence of being a widow during "this season" when people, who normally don't get it (less face it!), don't get it even more. I have been basically alone for the past week, which I did for myself when I'd had just too many senseless comments made to me, just one too many people with their cheerful family photos and "look at us so happy together". (It was just easier then punching them all) Here is hoping that we all are able to find our way in 2017, for I cannot stay on this current path too much longer. MB Right there with you, MB! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 19, 2017 Author Share Posted December 19, 2017 Another Holiday Season, another bump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motski Posted December 20, 2017 Share Posted December 20, 2017 Oh Great! Thanks Wifeless. Now I have the song, "It's the most horrible day of the year." stuck in my head. LOL There certainly are some talented member here. Thanks for the laughs this morning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WifeLess Posted December 21, 2017 Author Share Posted December 21, 2017 Yes, motski, they are indeed cleverly written. I first saw them on the old YWBB (this site's predecessor) during my first Christmas/Holiday Season as a widower, just a few months after my wife’s death. They were among the few things that made me laugh back then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beth_krkswidow Posted December 26, 2018 Share Posted December 26, 2018 Still love these songs. Took me awhile to find them. THIRD Christmas without him. Unbelievable. Still sucks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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