gracelet Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 The YWBB veterans will recall my utter nightmare with my homophobic in laws who blamed me for my wife's suicide, cut me out of the obituary, launched a hate campaign and tried to take me to the cleaners financially. I am absolutely over the moon to update you, two and a half years later, that they finally signed the other half of my house into my name. It cost me a shit tonne but I decided that it wasn't worth the battle. I wanted to put my energy into rebuilding my life. And rebuild I have. I love my life and I love myself. My home is my home! Her things are gone, apart from a few treasured items. I have a new little sausage dog, Mildred, on the way too! The in laws stole the other dog. I have to say that while you can't replace a wife, you can sort of replace a dog (!). I've fallen in love again with a woman who accepts me flaws and all. A woman who isn't afraid to ask questions about Elle and who doesn't shudder in horror when I occasionally cry on her. In fact, the tears are very infrequent these days. She and I laugh so much. We argue like healthy couples do. We support one another. We tell one another off. It's an equal partnership - I've never had that before. I got my house valued just the other day and it was a pleasant surprise. I am readv to move on to the next place and finally I can legally do so without the mess of shitty in laws. I'm looking for a house with a garden for my little doggy and a second bedroom which will, hopefully, be for a baby one day. I am NOT glad I was widowed. I will never move on. But, I have moved forward and I would not be the confident, grounded woman I am now who is true to herself and feisty as fuck if Elle hadn't died. Why am I writing this? Because I know you guys get it and won't judge me for being happy. Thank you for that. My friends assume I'm happy through and through and have left Elle behind me. My family think I didn't love my wife enough if I'm capable of being happy now. Many of you here pulled me through my darkest times. Thank you so much. I know I only lurk here now and post every now and then, but you're very dear to me :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 Woo-hoo!!! Great news, Grace! I am so happy for you! (((Hugs to you, Mildred, and your lady))) I just wish they would have gotten their collective head out of their ass sooner. There's no pleasing some people in widowhood - there really isn't. There are those that will think you never loved your dead spouse because you have found happiness again, or those that will tell you it is time to "move on" and "get on" in life because you are so sad. Don't know if you saw this satirical article that Jess posted on Facebook, but it hits the spot: http://www.theonion.com/article/elderly-man-whos-outlived-wife-8-years-must-not-ha-52715 Thank you for sharing your great news with us :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
klim Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 You go girl! Onward and Forward! Thanks for the update. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soloact Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 Justin, the article you linked really surprised me. I know we can't please people in relationship to meeting someone or not doing so. I never realized the rule about dying in a certain time frame. Amazing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 G you got that right, we surely do get it and I am so happy for you that things seem to be falling into place for you!! None of us asked for this new life but we sure as hell have to make the best of what we have. My DH would be the first one to kick my butt knowing how I have been struggling. I'm finding so much encouragement from my fellow wids in BAG and it's helping me more than y'all know!! Keep on keeping on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 Justin, the article you linked really surprised me. I know we can't please people in relationship to meeting someone or not doing so. I never realized the rule about dying in a certain time frame. Amazing! I hope that it was evident that the article is satire! I should have posted as much, in case some folks are not familiar with The Onion :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trying Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 Such great news and it's about time! Keep moving forward in your feisty way and don't give a second thought to the people who judge you, you know your truth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jess Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 This makes me so damn happy to read! Wonderful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 Grace, I'm smiling ear to ear for you! I wish I could give you the biggest hugs in person! Virtual ones will have to do in the meantime! 😊 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gracelet Posted April 16, 2016 Author Share Posted April 16, 2016 Thank you everyone. I feel like I'm winning at life again! I do sometimes tiptoe around wondering when the next blow will occur but I've learned not to let that hold me back from living life fully. I've been through hell already and none of us should apologise for having been there and come back breathing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 I've been through hell already and none of us should apologise for having been there and come back breathing. Totally agree. Happy for you, and it's inspiring how life has turned around for you. Hope the door didn't hit your intolerant, inhumane in-laws on their way out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoVerySad Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 Always love to see good news and know one of our group has found happiness again. I'm happy for you! Hugs... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torn Posted April 18, 2016 Share Posted April 18, 2016 Good stuff here Congrates on the house acomplishment...sounds like a tough road. Oh and the new Sweetie I'm your life... Good stuff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gracelet Posted May 3, 2016 Author Share Posted May 3, 2016 I just received more good news. I interviewed for a new job and I got it! It's a step up and a step in the right direction of me moving into the tech industry which is where I ultimately want to end up. I didn't even have to blag my interview. I just prepped my socks off and was authentic, ridiculous me. ALSO, my new baby puppy arrives today. Yet I find myself crying. Wtf?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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