Charging Rent

[Needytoo]

My parents had very good jobs but I worked and paid my way through college.  When I moved home and got a job I had to pay rent to my parents, $100/week and that was back in the 1980s. 

 

My son's didn't have to pay tuition but I made him pay for his books.  He lived at home throughout college and I paid his cell bill, car insurance and he paid for the gas. He just graduated and got his first job so I am asking he pay exactly the same rent I did, pay for his insurance and cell bill. He thinks I am horrible.  I have two sons and my grocery bill for one week is $300, I kid you not. 

 

Should we charge rent to our adult children? 

[daysofelijah]

I think it's a good idea. I know I will do it if my adult children want to live at home (if they're not going to school). My bf's 19 yo son was set to move out this summer, but he's discovered how expensive apartments are and has decided to live at home for free for awhile longer instead  :

[BrokenHeart2]

I have 5 siblings and when we finished high school and had a job we had to pay rent.  I didn't go to college for a year so I had to pay rent.  When I went to college I didn't have to pay rent. 

With my 2 stepkids (now in the late 20's) we bought them a car (very rural), they had to pay insurance and gas.  DH was great at car repairs.  If they were not in school they paid rent. We also paid for their college tuition and the agreement was if they failed they had to pay us for the semester.  I believe it is a terrific way for them to begin to learn self responsibility and ease them into the 'adult' world.  They learn to pay their own bills on time.  We didn't pay for cell phones either.  It's a luxury they needed to learn to pay for. 

My sister has 3 boys, 2 late teens and one is early 20's living on his own.  She has paid way too much for them and their finances are a mess and run back to Mom all the time.  None of them are in school and 1 isn't even working.  Why bother, Mom pays for everything anyway.

Good luck!

Hugs.

 

[Portside]

Should we charge rent to our adult children?

 

Hell yes. I had mine pay rent once they were working/out of college.

 

Three of my adult children are on my cell bill but no longer live at home. It makes good financial sense, it's cheaper for us all to be on one bill rather than each of us having a separate account. I have their portion automatically withdrawn from their bank account and deposited to mine monthly for their portion of the bill.

 

They didn't like it at first either.

[Abitlost]

I was not charged room and board by my parents and I turned out very financially responsible. My parents paid half my undergrad tuition as long as my grades were over a 3.0. I worked as a waitress summers and holidays to cover my portion. Grad school I was on my own.

 

I cannot imagine ever charging my kids for room and board. I am buying a vehicle that I am comfortable them driving which will cost more to insure than a beater-car; I will cover insurance unless there is a claim on it, then they will pay any surcharges. They will pay gas. I am altering my parents' approach to tuition because I want them to focus on academics or internships throughout their college years: as long as their grades are above 3.0, I will pay half of everything but will not collect their half until 10 years after they have completed all their studies, by which time they will be well-established and it will not be a hardship for them to reimburse me. That is my current state of thinking.

[Kater]

 

My first job was 8 hours from my parents, so living at home was not an option for me as it isn't for many people.  I don't think there is anything wrong with charging rent.  It seems a part of real life to me.  Perhaps you could ask him to prepare a budget of what it would cost him to live on his own or with a roommate.  I think he would quickly realize $300 is rather a bargain!

 

My parents charged my brother rent when he had to move home for a while.  He resented it and thought they were horrible.  But they had been socking it away, and when he did move out, they took him shopping, bought him a bed and a few other things to get his place furnished.  He felt pretty sheepish about complaining about it.

[imissdow]

I told both my girls that once they are out of school they start paying their own bills and rent if they choose to stay at home. I made a deal with my oldest that she could "earn" some of that money back by saving for a car, frist and last for a apartment or a few other thing. The oldest now pays for her cell phone, personal expenses, she also pays $400 for room and board. She doesn't drive yet so more often then not she walks to work. Chores are expected and if she wants a ride somewhere she usually cleans or mows the yard in exchange. My middle daughter will be heading off to college n ft year do for her I will pay her cell phone and she gets off with no rent over the summers. She does however pay for gas and car insurance to drive my car. She saving up to buy her own.

 

[Wheelerswife]

My parents charged my brother rent when he had to move home for a while.  He resented it and thought they were horrible.  But they had been socking it away, and when he did move out, they took him shopping, bought him a bed and a few other things to get his place furnished.  He felt pretty sheepish about complaining about it.

 

This reminds me of a friend who used to do her laundry at her parents' house.  They fed her dinner once a week and let her do laundry, but they charged her by the load.  They saved the money and when my friend finally moved to a place with washer/dryer hookups, her parents bought her a washer and dryer.

 

I thought that was pretty cool.

 

Maureen

[Guest TooSoon]

I'm not sure this is a cut and dry issue.  I think all children and their parents have different relationships and circumstances.  Life isn't some set trajectory we can project for our children.  We, of all people, should know this.  I mean, do it if it feels right but let's not make it some sort of moral issue.  Everyone's children and circumstances are different. 

[BrokenHeart2]

Couldn't agree more TS.  We were asked and we're all just giving our own life experience and opinions as

was asked. I love the varied experience we all offered!

Hugs to my wids!

[mmg19]

Too Soon expresses my thoughts exactly.  Too many variables and family dynamics and relationships for a cut and dry right answer.  I never paid rent but from an early age I saved from all money gifts and job money for future college costs.  When I lived at home during the summers I always worked and contributed to the grocery costs as well as helping with all household chores.

 

 

[klim]

Definitely an each to your own situation. Depends on your finances and their finances......but the bottom line is you want to make sure they are working towards independance and recognizing responsibilities and that they not take advantage of you. Good luck on finding your balance.