Navigating home town social life

[Sugarbell]

In Stepford..I wasn't connected to the community thru roots and it was close to a "city" so I never dated anyone in Stepford so this wasn't an issue.

 

Hometown is larger (but still small town)I know many people from early years growing up here..and I am not quite sure how to navigate potential dating. One man..he grew up 4 houses away from me..a few years older..was in our gang of kids who played together. ...we've been FB friends for years.he asked me out a few years ago-turned him down because I was seeing someone...Well we ran into each other at our kids Bible school (he's 52 but has a 6 and 9 yr old).. our 9 year olds are going to the same school/same class..There was still chemistry we hugged blah blah..he said we should do dinner sometime.

 

He's a well known principal and coach at another elementary school. I am a permanent sub for the county. I just feel like I am mixing worlds even with an innocent dinner. Then my kids asst baseball coach-who painted and helped get my house ready. Same thing. Said "We should do something sometime-go hike to take a day trip"

 

Baseball is hella competitive here...Again mixing worlds.

Both guys are divorced...respected in community...but lives are intertwined.

But yet...if I don't intertwine...I really won't meet any available guys...Unless I go online which I refuse to do.

 

So I am stand off ish...nice but not encouraging anything more. Am I missing potential good men here? Should I just say the hell with it?? And not worry about professional/kids stuff complications?

 

 

[Mizpah]

I don't have advice, but understanding, and thought I'd share this bizarre little story.  I was living in NYC when I met current boyfriend, who lives across the river from my hometown (how hometowny is it that I can call it "across the river from"?!).  In getting to know each other and sharing parts of our pasts and seeing who we know in common, it comes out that he'd dated my lifelong best friend's little sister!  A girl I've known since she was born (really, a few days later, but still!).  Awkward!!!!  I don't know if you watched Seinfeld, but they call it "the clashing of worlds," and it totally is.  I miss the anonymity of city living.  People TALK.  And talk and talk and talk.  But I think it's worth it to have fun and company and outings and the potential to have a relationship with "a quality man."  Good luck!

[Sugarbell]

Clashing of the Worlds is a good description.

 

Only good thing..you've weeded through all the nitty gritty already. I know background, family, political views all of it already. Elementary school principal is in my little private FB group of fellow liberals...he does outdoorsy camping trips with his kids (joint custody so he doesn't have them all the time)..And is well respected here. He's also a former all state athlete so knows sports., coaches, etc.

 

And he's 6'4. When I hugged him it was so nice to reach up to a guy.😎.

 

But yeah..with it comes talk talk talk...but really he's about as boring as me nowadays..so nothing exciting to say if we went out. His ex wife is the town veterinarian...So everyone knows her too.

[Taurus]

You might have to decide which one has more potential, as one is likely to drift away should you choose the other for a dinner/date. Do you feel your reputation can withstand the likely gossip should you decide to date each of them separately? 

 

You're the prodigal daughter returned: I'd imagine there would be quite a bit of interest (and envy!!) from the other eligible local ladies in your dating habits once you've settled back in Stepford

[Captains wife]

I live in a small town where everyone knows each other- I'm not from here originally but everyone else seems to be. My own rule is to not date anyone is town - too small a world, too many exes around. However, the dating pool is so limited when living somewhere like this and if you are not online dating that makes it tougher. I think I would proceed with caution and only take that chance if there was a significantly good match. All the best in your new location,

[daysofelijah]

I currently live in a small town. I do not date anyone from the town. I had a couple interested, but it just wouldn't work. One worked at the local school where I sub, one was the dad of my son's friend. It's just too small of a town, too much gossip, etc. My BF lives in a town 17 miles from here, it works pretty well, though I wish we were a little closer sometimes.

 

Good luck in your decisions, I know it's tough!

[Sugarbell]

Assistant baseball coach I wouldn't go out with. That would not be cool with baseball being "the" sport here and having 2 sons who play.

 

Principal yes...Even my sons when they talked to him said "He's really nice..he doesn't look 52."

 

Plus I have known him/his family my entire life. It's still a little close for comfort...but I think I will take him up on dinner. Out of town of course.

[Mrskro]

As a sports mom, I would have to nix the coach too. 

 

I get the "little close for comfort"  but sometimes its not a bad thing.  Good luck!

[mmg19]

Agree with Mrskro.  Nix to the coach but having a dinner with a friend sounds nice.  One dinner may just reinforce the friendship but gives you both a chance to see if you want any more than friendship.  Maybe friends is the best for both of you but who knows without trying.  Good Luck.

[Sugarbell]

I am out at principals school on assignment all this week.

 

He's very professional though in school setting. But such a super nice guy.😊

[Taurus]

I am out at principals school on assignment all this week.

 

He's very professional though in school setting. But such a super nice guy.😊

 

Sounds like someone's heartbeat has picked up a pace or two