momtokam

What is funny is my one and only post wid relationship was from POF, met about 2+ years ago. That site was about the same level as the others in my area. This time, quality went way down! I got off there in a big hurry!

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A few little tidbits from me... So....My gift to myself last Monday was to hide all my online profiles...Best gift I have ever received! Right before I hid my Tinder, I received a match, 19km away. When we started chatting, he told me he is was back in California, where he lives, after being in my city making a proposal to.....A pipeline company!!!! Forgot to add...He is also a widower! Here we go again I thought, another scammer! The conversation was so boring though.....My scammer was too dull to keep my attention!!! I tried to have a second date with someone. I liked him personally, we are both foodies and had a lot in common. I didn't really feel a huge attraction but I thought a second meeting would be nice, when he asked to meet me again. I gave him some dates to choose from and he left me to choose. The day before, he cancelled because he was too busy due to work. He then asked again, a week later. I was busy in the evenings during his free time, explained all my reasons, but offered a lunch on Friday (was tomorrow) which he was free for. I told him I would need to book off work, but I would be ok with that. Response I received was "Ok, maybe tomorrow If I am not too tired. I will know in the morning." I replied I would not book off work then, until I heard from him. I did later get a work call, and let him know I was no longer free. I have not heard back. Crickets! Really? So, I should have booked off work, not get paid, in the hopes that he might not be tired, and we could maybe have lunch? Not happening! I really would not believe this stuff...except that it actually is happening to me!!

I am so sorry.....

Big (((HUGS))) SW.... I understand so much of what you wrote....No one appeals to me either. I try to think that this is the case because the right person has not found their way to me yet, or to you, or to the other posters above. There is no reason to think it will never happen. We all have different time lines and can't compare ourselves to those that have successfully recoupled sooner than us, even though, we are envious.... We are capable and deserving of loving and being loved again. I just wish it would happen sooner rather than later...

I just heard this in the car....WOW!

Can there be a lower level than Type B??? 😨 Not sure I can be at B level....

CW, I feel a lot of the frustration you are feeling. I am 51, with a 17 yr old and 11 yr old twins. Men my age seem to come in 2 categories... 1. They are looking for 25-35 and want to 'finally' start their own families or relive their youth... 2. Their kids are grown and gone and they want to travel at a whim and see the world.... I am not a fit for either. I can barely get to a meet stage as I am up front about my busy life and kids. It doesn't matter if I am a great catch or not. I know there are exceptions, but they don't seem to be crossing my path for whatever reason. I think with on line dating, it's too easy to say no when there are so many other options to choose from. I am positive I am passed by, before being given a chance, because of my situation. I get the same thing, everyone says I am a great catch with great kids, any man would be lucky to join us. So where is he? I had a one year relationship with a separated man with twin girls. He was very happy to blend families. The problem was his toxic ex and his unwillingness to stand his ground with her and move forward. But that is another story in itself. My kids never really knew, I think my gut hesitations were right and I'm glad I didn't involve them. Since then I have met a few I have not clicked with, that didn't have kids or kids were grown, and a couple I see here and there, but mostly as friends, who also don't have kids. I have crossed on line paths with many scammers or 25 years olds. It's pretty ridiculous! I hid all my profiles on Monday..... Not sure where to go from here. I have started asking family and friends if they know anyone! No luck so far. I've tried meetups and I live in a big city! I'm not looking for a new instant husband or new dad for my kids. It just would be nice to have someone in my life, that's all. These are just my experiences so far in this crazy, post widowed dating life. I truly get everything you are feeling.

I'm not into astronomy too much but today there is a full moon that has a special connection for me. http://www.keen.com/CommunityServer/UserBlogPosts/Emilie_Moe/Full-Moon-In-Virgo-On-Mystical-Number-222-Today--By-Emilie-Moe/787552.aspx Take from this what resonates. For me it's a time of letting go and starting new... 😊

Scammers.....What Maureen and Rob said, plus... They always have an excuse not to meet you, They are away on business for a few weeks, They are new to town, They are widowers, (sad I know, they think it will get them sympathy) They are pipeline engineers, They are gold merchants, They are quickly enamoured with you.... I like to waste their time too! And then report them. I tell them to send me a pic of themselves, on their trip, in front of a tourist attraction! They vanish right after that! 😁 I've had lots lately. 😨

I think it's everyone - I get more scammers than anything else. I amuse myself by calling them out on their shenanigans. I call them out on it too......I also will waste some of their time on purpose if I'm bored! It's just getting to be way more than I've had before. I think it's time for a break. I will have to rely on you all to share some laughs with me!

Another, new to my town, widower, gold merchant this time.... Do I have "Scammer Target" tattooed to my forehead in my profile pictures? I'm so fed up, I'm done! It's just not meant to be!

It's basically an opening line, nothing more, nothing less. Those are usually the ones that want sex only, or sexting buddies, or are scammers. There may be the odd exception but, if a man wants to know the real you, he probably won't start off like this.

Torn, you may feel more ready when the right situation presents itself to you. This just wasn't it. And that is OK.

Never got far enough to find out! Engineer #2 went POOF when I mentioned my coincidence chatting with another widower, new in town, pipeline engineer! 😁😁😁😁

Be proud mama...you've done good! My 11 year old daughter made and brought me breakfast in bed this morning along with homemade flowers. 😊 A day early!

Maureen, don't give up! It's so good that you are getting yourself out there. Many Mr Wrongs will cross our paths before the Mr Right will. Take it one day at a time and remember to laugh at these experiences because laughing is way better than crying! 😊

http://m.kiss925.com/2016/02/10/how-men-can-up-their-tinder-game/ Apparently you need to wear red, scowl, and hold a dog. (In your case one of your kitties) 😁

😁😁😁😁😁 If only you were not so far away!

Rob, does she have any ideas what you should do regarding consequences about the lying? Sometimes they are tougher on themselves than we could be. Maybe the new phone should be very limited in features, call/text only....limited/or no data/music plans etc? Would she pay for it from the money you give her quarterly or from other funds? I agree with Trying on lying and the trust issue. It needs to be earned and losing that trust results in having her needing to earn it back. I haven't faced a lying situation like this so I'm not sure if I helped at all. When my daughter's phone got dropped and run over (cracked screen) and dropped in the toilet, the repair bills had to be paid back in babysitting hours for her siblings.

Time for a little update! Gentleman (using the term loosely) I was enjoying chatting with seems to have gone poof! I don't think I was providing the pics or dialogue he was desiring. Suspicions he may have been a loan shark too! My widower (who went poof), new to my city, said he was a pipeline engineer, he was from match. Oh, guess what, I have a new match on tinder.....a widower, new to my city, who is a pipeline engineer....😨 You just can't make this stuff up! I am not holding anything back with this one!

Completely immature and he is a scum... Now you know he was not the one for you. I'm just sorry you had to deal with this.

Many positive thoughts coming to you. This length of a relationship deserves more than having to endure 6 days of silence. That is very disrespectfull of the relationship and you, not to mention immature. You are not teenagers. If it was me, I would no longer reach out, you have done this before and yet, here you are again. If it is something he truly wants to resolve, he should step up and initiate the conversation. If he doesn't, you have your answer. It truly sucks, but you deserve so much more. It is out there some where. Sometimes I feel the need to settle because I feel something better may not be out there for me. I'm learning I need to change this frame of mind. We are special women....there is absolutely no reason why we shouldn't expect and demand only the best for ourselves. 😊

I'm sorry Rob.... It has been an interesting month... Met one gentleman, very nice but not more than friends. Chatted with another, widower, new in town, when I suggested we meet, he went poof! Scammer for sure. Chatting with a new gentleman I am enjoying very much. Plan to meet after I get back from my trip. Some spidey senses that there might be something fishy. We shall see. Had date 5 with my minimal texter. Movie only, no attempt to touch me until the good night kiss...still don't know if am I am a buddy with kissing benefits! He is really nice and texts me every day. He did ask tonight if I packed a bikini for my trip! Rob, you can chat with us ladies in Florida if you want!!! 😊

Happy Birthday Kiddo! 😊