Sugarbell

My Mom is going to check her bill when she gets it. I don't even know what kind of phone she has....it's super old. I have had lots of problems with my IPhone 5...I do know some can get viruses--And my battery was draining and not charging and had to spend 80 to fix the charger/outlet thing. Or paranormal possibly....I don't think so much of DH...but I think we all have positive energies, spirit guides, angels-Whatever you choose to call them...We also have to be careful of negative energies too (which can be a nuisance) But still a little stumped. Not freaked out like I was...but just stumped.

Very good point

I do agree Barney. Been happy both single and in a relationship (last 4 years) Been miserable both single and in a relationship (first 4 years) If I am not happy with me-No one or nothing can bring me peace/happiness. Not saying people should just sit around and wait for prince/princess charming to just fall into your lap. But I focused on myself (hobbies, work, interests, travel) kids and home...And it just happened: And if it doesn't work out for some reason...I will be hurt...but will be ok. But I sound like a broken record and I know it's annoying to hear that stuff-but that's my philosophy on it all.

Booooo Serpico! Actually I figured I would get a smarty response. This is why IRL I don't discuss this stuff. Seriously though...it's odd. I have never texted my Mother-Ever. Why is my phone doing that stuff??

I have been trying to figure this out for the past 12 hours. Researching. I know you can get a virus on your phones that can cause it to send random text messages...but I am stumped and a little spooked. This past weekend-I was really on overload (even more than usual)... had 10 kids here Friday for daughters birthday, was arguing with my Mom...had a TV celebrity-local guy at daughters party (it was a mountain monsters theme-a TV show-he's one of them) Kicked everyone out Sat morning..drove 2 hra for district game-rain, delays...didn't get home till midnight Sat Sunday was a repeat of Sat-except rushed back to get other son to practice an hour opposite direction in Ohio. So...I was off...tired, irritable. my mom has an old 90s flip phone-she doesn't text...I have never texted her...she has to pay for each text she gets. A text came through at 10:30am Sat morning to her....from me saying "I need to call you" She showed me that afternoon. It was from my phone. She responds back "Now?" Her response is on my phone--but not this text. She's not in my old texts because I have never texted her. She is in contacts. But that's it. My phone was charging and the kids didn't have it. So could she somehow send this to herself making me think it was from me??...or could it be something paranormal? A virus? But why to her, whom I have never texted and about calling me? When we were fussing anyway at the time? Anyone?

Ugh I am so sorry!! I agree it's awful....I am at a district game as we speak (delayed game for 2 hours because storm in middle of the game) The Moms from the opposing team are acting like this is a backyard brawl. The yelling reminds me of being in a red neck bar. I am in the car avoiding everyone lol

Yes! If I stay the while week we may go there. His conference ends at noon on Friday and he's not planning on being hone till Saturday. He told me I would love it and we should go Never been to Vegas....and I can tell it's really not me..But looking forward to the experience and getting away from my kids for a few days! (yup..I need away from them!)

We will to a Bago somewhere!!!!

Lifetime appointments in our third branch of government. Thank to our Founding Fathers...they knew what they were doing.

Let me know Maureen! Would love to meet you and your niece!

Awe crap!! I meant July 12-July 16th. It's been a crazy week my brain is mush!

Just throwing this out...I will be in Vegas from June 12-June 16th. Anyone in that area want to hang our? Drink by the pool? Lunch? Going with guy friend and he's in meetings all day (just me no kids this time)...Didn't know if any wids were in that area.

I think I am actually one that prefers being the girlfriend to the wife. I like being in an exclusive relationship...but don't want a husband yet. The way I have found peace with it-is to embrace the here and now. I don't think in terms of marriage until my kids are older. It's been just me with them for 8 years and I have grown to like it that way. Marriage is work...marriage with 3 school age kids is lots of work. I am not ready for it. And for ME it wouldn't work. But when they are older...I could definitely be married. I miss the husband/wife.."our" kids...but I have been parenting twice as long solo as a did as a couple-so that probably has a lot to do with my attitude.

((((hugs)))) I get it. It's complicated I know.

Don't feel bad ...you were scared, away from home, no money...and had other kids with you. I would've been on here freaking out too. Over the years though...I have learned (and it's been a work in progress) to think with logic not emotions especially in emergency situations. So glad things worked out. ! I love that area of beaches.

Take a deep breath and think logically...did you file a police report, talk to the state park office about the theft? Sometimes seriously they will give you cash to get home for an emergency. Other people camping close by? May have extra food? Are you at Myrtle Beach? That place is flooded with pawn shops. Anything on you you can pawn? ...just to get enough gas money to get home? Also at Myrtle....they always have those time share people trying to get you to look at condos....and you usually get a gift (that you can pond) and they usually feed you. I have been in these predict aments....it's important to be resourceful and street wise and appear in control to the girls. (Yea I ran our of gas after a huge power outrage that lasted 3 wks a few years back--I ended up just asking people on the road to give me money for gas that it was an emergency. You're in the south--people will help out. Sometimes at the beaches they even have like a job for 2 hours on the beach..... These are just things I have seen over the years down there.

Ugh....Exactly what does she expect you to do??? I think sometimes therapists forget-you are Mom 24/7... you can't take the weekend off while he's at his Dads house. You've been going out almost a year and he's 4??? I think you have been very cautious-good grief. YOU and your son deserve a nice getaway. When my kids were 4 (and I went thru age 4 three different times with each one) I always said I had a play date. At that time my sons still had play dates with boys or girls as did my daughter. They never got attached or really had an issue with it. I have platonic male friends too...and we did things with them...really at 4 they didn't know the difference. Now my kids are almost 8 11 and going on 13. It's much more complicated now! Go have fun.!!

"he's cool..we are friends" I have just been saying that to people for 9 months. Or just say "No". Your life your rules

He maybe totally vested and into the relationship....it just may not be in his make up to do the untiring things you are used to. I have learned.....that sometimes if things don't work out-it's not because of the other person not being into me or vice versa...Bur what we need from relationships are totally different things. I am not a texter...I don't want a guy texting or calling me all day. Some women do. There is nothing wrong with either way. My new guy...some women would think he's too distant...but it's what I need and works for us. It wouldn't necessarily work for other women. It's what you need and your comfort with the relationship. I would discuss it with him..he maybe unaware...he maybe able to give you more..he may not. Yes this is much more complicated in your 40s than 20s. Lordy yes!

When DH first died...I was fuming angry and gave away the majority of his stuff. I hung onto his ties, college class ring and watch. But I regret getting rid of so many things so early. However...in recent years my son and I have really gotten into landscaping the yard. I have five large flower beds and the back of the yard is landscaped. My first few years I was so out of it and raising babies that I was lucky to get the yard mowed...never dealt with the flower beds. But now-working in the landscaping-I keep uncovering large mountain rocks that we got on our trips to the mountains-From various rivers, mountain tops, places. People used to think we were crazy because every trip (and we were in the mts at least twice a month before kids/dating) we would haul 2 rocks in the jeep. And now...the yard looks like it did when he was alive (finally)....And I have these rocks...these unique small boulder like rocks that set off the landscaping. Each one has a story-each one from a special place. They were too big to just throw away....in all the craziness of the first few years they were forgotten....but not lost. All the "stuff" he had...and my most prized possession...the link and stories I get to share with my kids...are in these beautiful rocks in our landscaping...and we uncover different ones...that were buried under layers and years of mulch and dirt. We both had gypsy souls....we both loves the mts and outdoors. I am so grateful I still have this connection to him. What are your most prized possessions from your late spouse?

Hurting animals--Big red flag. I am no expert....and it may indeed just be displaced jealousy that he grows out of. Just trust your gut...your gut instinct knows Something is off with this kid...listen to it. 4 year olds that are jealous may ignore the baby or act out to there parents for more attention...or call the baby stupid (my sons did all of these)...But try to really inflict pain on the baby? And talk about killing her and sending her to heaven before she's even born? That's fucked up.

Right after he told me..he spiked an 103 fever that would not come down even with meds. He was almost delusional for 3 days..Took him to the doctor-no ear infection, strep. They were giving him 24 more hours then admitting him to hospital. After I found his Dad his fever went down almost immediately. A priest once told me that my son has experienced the angel of death that came when his Dad died. Don't know what I believe....but I know he experienced something unexplainable. To this day he won't discuss it...and hates anything paranormal (he's not an eccentric type-meat n potatoes jock)

Does his son live with you?or is it joint custody? Weekends? No..your daughter isn't safe with him. He's jealous and it maybe just jealousy..he may not understand that he could seriously injure her. Or he may I indeed know what he's doing. My 3 are 4 1/2 years apart. First two are 21 months. I can honestly say when they were all under 5 they were never violent to each other. Neither boy ever wanted to hurt the baby sister. I don't think it was in there make up. Now..school age they do fight and all 3 have traded punches with each other. No it's not good--and it's always provoked-they feel empathy and never push to the point of serious injury. But this worries me about your husbands son to act our like this this young. It may indeed be nothing-a jealous phase. But it maybe something with him for life (I am of the school of thought that sociopaths are born that way..- A chip in the brain is missing-the empathy part. And environment can help or make it worse...but the lack of empathy is inborn) Keep an eye on your daughter. I understand your stress and concern. (((;;Hugs)))))

B died on the 24th...was missing for 3 days and was found on the 27th. Coroner estimated day of death was the 24th. My oldest son also told me that day that his Dad died, how he died, where he shot himself, etc. (he was only 4..and it's a mystery that started me into the psychic phenomenon because I have no idea how my kid knew this) My oldest son knows his Dad died on his brothers birthday. He says he will take it to his grave-His Vision at age 4 still haunts him. The tombstone only has year of birth and year of death. The death certificate says estimated day of death 9/24. Middle son doesn't associate it at all. I have never shown my sadness on that day (even year 1)..But oh it added to my already complicated grief early on. Just sucks anyway you slice it. ((( Hugs)))

So...I am coming up on 8 years in Sept. For the past few years on that day...I intentionally go on with life as usual...it's not a gut wrenching fake it day like it was in my early years (his death day is also on the day of my middle sons birthday)..So I used to force myself through my sons party (usually accompanied by a few panic attacks) but got through it. In recent years...it's a smooth day...but I know. I know the smells of fall..the sun...and it takes me back to the day he died. Almost like it's my own little dirty secret...I don't share or dwell on it...I don't acknowledge it...the focus that day is on my son (who looks identical to his Dad) not DHs death. And I have wondered how long I will know. So Sunday new guy was kinda quiet (he's private guy).. finally he said "Today is the day my Dad died from a heart attack. I was outside playing..he had it inside...the ambulance came...my siblings wouldn't let me in the house...I was 7" He's now 52...45 years later he still remembers the day and what he was doing. He says he has never missed a year when he didn't know it was the particular day and he's always a little off on that day. He also reassured me that I did the right thing not telling my son that his Dad died on his birthday. I always say there Dad died 3 days later-which is the day I found his body. He told me that date would be with my son forever and I did the right thing going with the day I found his body. 45 years later and he never has forgotten the day each year.