ummmm ouch!

[OSAAT]

Ouch! My heart hurts and my grief is back. It's very strange to me. I have been BAG for a few years. So a very quick version: got back from vacation and had to put my 15 y/o dog down 3 weeks ago. Then I decided that it is time to move to my own place. No more roommates. I have a lot of memories ib this home with J and my pup. This was our home. I know the right decision is to move, but that does not mean it's been easy. I have been breaking down pretty frequently. I feel like I am letting go of some last pieces here. Like I am walking away. The feeling is heart wrenching. In the midst of all of that, I got a job in my profession, and it has been a good distraction. Just feeling so much pain and experiencing grief again. Just so strange.

[Baylee627]

Seasons of change-'-especially the ones you are currently confronting--have a way of throwing us off our center, feeling like we've missed a step.

 

I think it's natural to find yourself transported back into acute grief for the time being.

 

I'm sorry for your heavy heart, Precious Girl.

 

Baylee

 

 

[swilson]

Oh mercy, saying goodbye to a furbaby  :'( and moving. You have some painful stuff going on, some would just curl up in the fetal position and stay a while. Glad the job is working out, hope things smooth out soon.

[SimiRed]

So sorry for you dog  

 

Yes, moving will bring back that sense of loss/grief.  You are losing another part of that chapter in your life and it's okay to feel sad about it. 

 

It is heart wrenching to let go of our "comfort zone!"

[Carey]

So sorry about your baby. Our pets are family and it is never easy to say goodbye.  I guess we are all seeing that there are no "stages", no "progression" and that there are just going to be times where it just plain hurts   However I would like to congratulate you on the job and wish you much luck with the move.  Letting go sucks.

[Mizpah]

Big changes and death of a loved companion - makes total sense to me that you're hurting.  It seems whenever things are bad or scary, the grief is like, "Wait for me, I'm here too, don't leave me out."  It's so hard to compartmentalize, and you can't help but think all the "what if"s and miss them in those times of need.  I'm thinking of you.

[Ursula]

hi, sorry it is difficult for you. I am not surprised. You need strength and faith to move to a new place and grief is our chronic weakening 'backpack' , that we carry around all the time. Sometimes it pressures and hurts and gets just too heavy to carry. That is when we sit down and take it off and cry until it feels easier again. Good luck on your move. Your dog was also your companion and it hurts to loose them. And then all the other hurt comes flushing in as well....take care of yourself.

[maddalena]

what's BAG?

[MrsT85]

BAG = beyond active grieving

[Guest look2thesky]

The grief thing always has a way of coming and going.

Just when a few good days, it creeps up at the worst of moments.

Hugs to you.

[Bluebird]

Hi OSAAT,

 

I'm sorry you are feeling your grief again hon. The loss of your dog and the decision to move to a new place are both enormous, memory triggering events.

 

When I sold the home I shared with Stephen it was tough...going through each room, touching things we owned together, thinking about things that happened, discovering forgotten items that triggered a memory - sometimes happy, sometimes sad. There were days I just sat in the floor in a room and cried....most often that occurred in our shared office. Grief was triggered all over again, and perhaps even more intensely when I sold a home that Stephen had renovated in the years before his death. He had literally sunk blood, sweat and tears into the renovation and simply walking in the door brought a visceral reaction that I was not prepared for.

 

I guess this is "normal", or we are both done for! I wish you peace and joy as you begin your new role in your chosen profession (Yay!) and settle in your new home.

 

Big hugs, Bluebird