swilson

{hugs} deedee. I think it is helpful to talk about your grief here because those of us who have also lost loved ones truly understand what you are going through. I felt like an alien in my own town after DW died, like there was no way anybody could know what I was feeling or no way they could know the depth of my pain. So it seemed futile to talk about it because words couldn't begin to express the pain. I remember friends and even some family got on with their day to day lives, seemingly oblivious to what happened. It's not that people don't care I think it's because each person's response to death is different. Sending thoughts of comfort and peace your way <><.

MrsDan, sorry for your load of stress. Hope DD feels better real soon and interview goes well. Keep calm and carry on - yea right :-\

Not proud to say that I've played this card, i.e. "Well shoot, I'm sorry this is one of those things my late wife took care of."

I'm no where near ready to even think about dating, but it impresses me that y'all are enjoying each others company for 3-1/2 hours. Hope you have a great # 3.

I'm sorry and agree it sucks that something so beautiful can remind us of our greatest pain. :'(

I'm sorry Baylee, after reading your account I wonder how you will ever resolve, or fully recover from that awful ordeal. :'(

Dahlia, I'm so sorry you've lost your husband and for your children. It's good to hear about your family & support group helping out. Awesome friends are a blessing during a tragic time such as this.

A few I've read, many I hope to read; Widow to Widow: Thoughtful, Practical Ideas For Rebuilding Your Life ~ Genevieve Davis Ginsburg For Widows Only ~ Annie Estlund When Your Soul Aches ~ Lois Mowday Rabey Companion Through the Darkness ~ Stephanie Ericsson I Will Not Be Broken ~ Jerry White The Tender Scar: Life After the Death of a Spouse ~ Mabry, Richard Chicken Soup for The Greiving Soul ~ Jack Canfoeld, Mark Victor Hansen & Amy Newmark Seven Choices ~Finding Daylight After Loss Shatters Your World" by Elizabeth Harper Reflections of a Grieving Spouse: The Unexpected Journey from Loss to Renewed Hope ~ H. Norman Wright's Coping with Life After Your Mate Dies ~ Cushenbery, Donald C. Getting to the Other Side of Grief: Overcoming the Loss of a Spouse ~Zonnebelt-Smeenge, Susan J. The Light That Never Dies: A Story of Hope in the Shadows of Grief ~ William HendricksA Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows through Loss ~ Jerry Sittser Finding Your Way Through Grief, A Guide for the First Year ~ Marty Tousley Waking Up Alone, Grief & Healing ~ Julie K Cicero How to go on Living When Someone you Love Dies, ~ Therese A Rando Widows Wear Stilettos, A Practical & Emotional Guide for the young widow ~ Carole Brody Fleet I Wasn't Ready to say Goodbye ~ Brooke Noel & Pamela Blair Healing After Loss by Martha W Hickman Loving What Is, Four Questions that Can Change Your Life ~ Byron Katie From One Widow to Another: Converstations on the New you ~ Miriam Neff The Grief Club ~ Melody Beattie A Widow's Story ~ Joyce Carol Oates The Sisterhood of Widows ~ Mary Francis Traveling With George: An Out-of-This-World Experience ~ Betty Waldron Portenlanger Where Do I Go from Here? - Neff, Miriam From One Widow to Another - Neff, Miriam

Nope, not okay and most times it's barely tolerable. Just get tired of surviving and existing. My coping skills seem to be improving and it helps a little in navigating this heartbreak.

Thanks for starting this, many postings I can check off as shared. Don't have anything to add but after only 6 months, there's still plenty for me to screw up.

Hi Donswife. glad to see you here. I posted my avatar photo by clicking on Profile, then moved mouse pointer to Forum Profile, right click and you'll see options for Personalized Picture. Maybe someone can post simpler directions than these.

I'm sorry, these sadiversary dates are like a kick in the gut. :'( May you reflect on the changes that have happened, on how far you?ve come and on how you might honor her memory.

Glad you found the glasses, like you I miss my pre widower mind. I quit pouring tea into a used milk jug after I poured tea on my cereal one morning not so long ago ???

Love knows not its depth until the hour of separation ~ Kahlil Gibran

At times I didn?t believe she had really died. My mind is still at times confused, foggy and it?s tough to concentrate on most anything. With young ones I know you have to keep going but remember to also take time for you (as much as you can squeeze in.)

She was still awake at midnight when I asked her to come to bed. It wasn't unusual for her to have a little insomnia now and then. When I awoke at 5 am to get ready for work she still hadn't come to bed. I found her sitting in the kitchen floor and thought she had fallen asleep but when I tried to wake her she was unresponsive. Called 911 and began CPR, the medics arrived and God bless them, they worked on her another 30 minutes before loading her for a trip to the E.R. She was pronounced dead 20 minutes after arrival and the staff let me say good-bye after they got her unhooked and cleaned up. I asked the coroner to have her examined at the regional morgue where they found an occluded left anterior descending artery (a.k.a. widow maker). I not really a sound sleeper and didn't hear any distress or noise- nothing.

Jason, I'm sorry your having to endure this nonsense along with the loss of Grace. It's too easy for mean spirited people to hide behind screen names and type out horrible, hurtful crap. If more would ponder the wise words attributed to Babcock; "When I want to speak let me think first -Is it true? -Is it kind? -Is it necessary? If not, let it be left unsaid."

Men Anonymous Creed I'm a man, But I can change, If I have to, I guess. ~Red Green

Maybe a play on the noun Wicca. Not to suggest we're all pagans although to be a widow(er) means belonging to a group that no one chooses to hang with. I wondered if the pinky swear of the logo suggests that fellow widow(er)s will try to honor, support and encourage one another without malice, judgments or intolerance.

{hug} BentNOTbroken, I'm sorry for your tragic loss, so bittersweet yet praise God your daughter is doing fine . You've found a good place here and hope you continue to let us know how you're doing.

Share recipes? ;D You may be onto something mangomom, perhaps a "cooking for one" thread. If I ask about a recipe or something I'll usually give it a try and afterward engage in some follow up chat about how it worked out.

I act clueless about domestic stuff around the ladies at work. It's a chance to enjoy a little female conversation even if it is only about a recipe or laundry advice.

{keeptrying}, This catastrophe has upended you and your family?s life, striking to the very core of your being. It?s agonizingly painful and your spirit has been severely injured. You wouldn?t expect your body to recover immediately from a vicious attack and along that line of reasoning, neither can your inner self.

She could always calm Bella by whispering. Dog misses her too :'(

{Hug} Sorry deedee you tragically lost your husband, welcome to a place that has been tremendous help for me. I'm glad you have support of friends and family.