swilson

What are we supposed to do with this pain? We could let it consume and destroy us or we continue to fight and get on with life, suffering our setbacks and heartbreak in private behind closed doors. I want to tell them; "Don't mistake any appearance of strength on my part as having moved on and being completely healed.

{hug} Maureen. Dorothy's famous line, "There's no place like home" has a dampened feeling for some widdas.

A couple of the decorators of DWs grave couldn't give her the time of day while she was alive, I just shake my head and think to myself, "You have no idea of what you missed, so go screw yourself."

I'm sorry Jess, I agree with your description of this being a hell of a ride where we can't predict the next crash. On a somewhat positive note, Dr. Robert Jeffress once said, "Going through grief is like going through a tunnel. The bad news is the tunnel is dark. The good news is that once you enter into that tunnel, you are already on your way out."

Welcome jodiwitz, I'm sorry you lost your husband. Lots of good advice posted here, early on the pain seemed never ending and consumed my mind, body and soul for many days. This site is a great blessing to me with so many folks who identify with most everything we are suffering. Look forward to hearing about the upcoming wedding, grandbaby and how you're getting along.

SR, I can't begin to fathom how painful and difficult this is for you. I'm proud of your courage for taking back your life and protecting the well- being of your son.

Sugarbell, you're handling this much better than I would. It doesn't seem right to discuss certain areas with the person who nursed us and powdered our butts. :-[

No disrespect Virgo, your Dad sounds as though he is close to needing an intervention. Grass and weeds are bad enough but if he ends up with a nasty STD he will really have something to be depressed about.

Thanks for sharing, love his take on the happiness thing. I'll embrace, cherish and savor it when possible, but there will always be a feeling below the surface to remind me to honor and appreciate it while it lasts.

No not silly, my furbaby helped me through some of the darkest times and is still here to stumble along where ever we end up.

Virgo we received a notice that had a drawing of proper placement of mailbox in relation to the road, blah, blah. The mailbox had settled through the years, I get that, then they threatened to stop delivery of mail. DW stewed about it so I set a new post to put an end to the USPS BS.

Prayers for strength and comfort <>< This too shall pass.

Jen, I stay away from those who criticize or who try to help me manage my grief. You know the ones who tell you, "keep your chin up," or "keep calm and carry on," or "be happy, it will get better." While these remarks are usually well-intended, we don't have to accept them. We have a right to express our grief and no one has the right to try to take that away.

Enjoy the ride, I'll be in touch. Happy Trails!

Lifting Jackie's husband up in prayer <><.

[hug] Pat I'm sorry to read this sad story. I know your heart breaks for his family left behind and like so many tragedies, it just doesn't seem fair

Brenda, after 8 months I still wear mine but I agree with those who say that it's an emotionally personal decision and only you can know when it's time. Kudos for thinking about moving your life forward, it sucks when the reality hits home they're not coming along with us. :'(

[Hug] It's hard to imagine how some people can sleep at night. Pencil pushers whose sole purpose is to screw survivors out of their settlements or benefits must have hearts of stone. Let's hope the industry wakes up to install backup cameras and implement other safety measures to prevent another family this pain and loss.

In 8 months, I haven't had many situations where marital status comes up. If it's for business or anyone that really doesn't need to know then I'm single. Not ashamed of being a widower just don't feel the need to share it with everyone.

{Hug} treedweller. I'm so sorry you have unwillingly entered a new chapter in your life. What I found here is a nurturing environment and some very caring and helpful people. I'm glad you joined many of us who hope to find a little comfort on the path to healing. Those times when you feel isolated and all alone there is usually someone here.

Sorry ladies, I'm feeling really mischievous tonight; http://www.magicmikemovie.com/ That should add fuel to the smoldering embers :-*

Don't feel alone, the incentive some days is almost gone. Not nearly as inspired as before, basically just in a mode where responsibilities are covered and duties get checked off with no real passion behind minimal effort. I don't like this despondency and moodiness.

I'm sorry for your pain kwalsh360, it's like nothing most of us have ever felt before. Keep reaching out, telling your story and remember to take care of yourself. This forum has been a beacon of light in my cloudy journey.

the_master, I also confess to being annoyed over things that in pre-widda times wouldn't have bothered me as much. Started avoiding social contact as much as possible but realized that wasn't healthy or my true nature. I want to believe most people don't intend to be irritating with their behavior although some days it makes me wonder.

<>< prayers, as you quiet yourself, sustain an open heart and a gentle spirit. Mother Teresa often said, "The beginning of prayer is silence."