donswife

things will be calmer schedule wise I bet now so just let me know new date when we figure it out thanks !

Yes that was an inappropriate shirt to wear to work don't quite understand that just because its for a "cause" t shirts can get a pass on their content and I understand why it would bother you and you handled it well I could never understand why they call it a "fight" when dealing with cancer , means there is a winner and a loser I will admit i do see myself resenting older couples , makes me angry because Don didn't get to be one of those older men

Ended up being having a better day after the sadness and frustration of just all of this still not going to lie ,hated every minute of Don not being here , he would've have loved it He would have napped under the trees by the lake I did end up having a good time with my family , friends and dog and couldn't ask for better weather and red sunsets

of course Joe would be proud and like it was said before that is his brithday present from you and you have to love the one friend, who not only knows what you need but just does it no questions asked hope it ends up being an ok day for you

I love the idea of a black widow and once you use things with humor I bet more people will approach the subject of you and losing your husband I have noticed humor actually opens people up plus it gets it all out there

what a wonderful card , and just seeing their handwriting makes me miss them even more thanks for sharing it take care

thank you all I am up and I will think of the tears as cleansing amazing how they just come out , different kind of tears i notice , like they have a mind of their own and won't stop till they are ready I am at a cottage on the lake with the dog till friday I knew i needed it this week my niece is on her way here and my sister and brother in law right behind her so will start the fun part of being on the lake thanks again , this is so much easier when I know I am not feeling this alone

I thought i was strong enough to take this on just so exhausted of this whole life of losing him so yesterday was our 24 th anniversary ,handled that well but today it was like a wrecking ball on my heart the fact Don isn't here destroys me I don't understand why he is gone , the tears keep coming and I want them to stop once again like the rest of you I will go to bed (well not really sleep ) and get up and honor his name but i so wish he was here just needed to say this

what an amazing post and tribute to your love story we are so lucky to have had the love of our lives and married our best friends ( I wish i didn't have to write had in that sentence) so not only did we lose the love of a life time but also our best friends you have a gift in your writing and knowing how to say what we are all feeling thank you for you post

will tell you even being in "our" home , still at times doesn't feel like a home with out him You also had to move and deal with so much the feeling of just taking up space is so understood here , still in that mindset here but slowly getting better but just getting up and getting through the day is a big deal and you are doing that wish I could make it easier take care

I am so sorry it went that way , its hard enough walking into a social situation alone its more then being by yourself, its the whole gut wrenching feeling and reminder, at that moment that you don't have your other half with you and that is heartbreaking enough I am very impressed that you were able to stick it out for 2 hours I have perfected what my niece calls the "Irish goodbye" where you sneak off with out making a fuss or saying good bye have only gone to one bago and I had a great experience , it was weeks after my don died and my emotions were very raw so I am so grateful that it went so well hope the next one you go to will be that for you

I am away this week but get home friday night so let me know if its a go on saturday

this is such good advise and I echo , do what feels right for you You probably don't know what that is right now so let them know that I can't remember what I did for my birthday but I know I didnt want to celebrate because Don wasn't here Try your best to just get through the day and Breath ! take care

sending good vibes your way today I am sure it was hard to go back to the apartment I also wanted to tell you i am so sorry wish I had more input for you but just keep reaching out take care

one of the best out of the blue things Don did was ...I went away to the cape for a long weekend when I got home he had built a shed , out of the blue , I had no clue he was going to do it He built the shed , to clear the garage to start the renovation of our house ...yes that right there is Man logic ! and I loved it t was the perfect way to show he loved me and our home and he got to use power tools

yes I get the fostering thing , I could never do that either I spoil them to much and then wouldn't be able to let them go I wish I could lend you my dog for couch cuddles and support wish It could be easier

could you volunteer at shelter or foster for a little bit that might help you pick put the next best fit it so hard to come home to not have your dog greeting you take care and again sorry about losing your dog

I think we can be extra sensetive about critisism because we don't have the one person who always had our backs with us whenever we questioned a decision before, we had our spouses to be a constant sounding board or support even if it was as simple as ordering a pizza I so miss that

No matter what it is , it seemed to give you a chance to think about your DH so maybe that is a little bit of comfort in all the things that are going on My Don was convinced they had "someone" doing strange things in the house he had rented when we first dated lots of unexplained things would happen , and no animals to blame it on Good luck with your mom moving in I have a friend who also can't wear a regular watch Just jen--- that sounds pretty cool about the street lights , I would have so much fun freaking people out with that one

yup just fuck this whole widowhood thing not you guys.... but all the rest

oh god yes I so am feeling the same these days I went to our favorite neighbors party (75th) and I really didn't know anyone Don and I would've still have had fun sitting at our own table talking and giving each other the "look" of lets get outta here Will say I pulled an irish goodbye and slunk out of the party I still can't believe the person who knew me better then I knew myself and who was the only one that I had a lifetime of inside Jokes with, is really gone ..Man those were some really funny jokes

Yes I keep putting this off but need to get it done thanks for the reminder

oh those dreams are the worse , the ones were you are told again they are not coming back hope it didn't ruin your weekend I have a lot of the dreams where don just comes back , like it was all a mistake I even say what do we do with the life insurance etc, so weird and comforting at the same time ..then I wake up the funniest part is don looks like he did when we were first married

so sorry to hear about Pru , sending hugs and healing thoughts your way

totally get the scared shitless part !! well everything you wrote I understand Can't reply any better than what Jess wrote I will give you the prospective of the wedding , you will be surprised at how well people might react to you Last weekend was my Nephews wedding , I am from a huge family so hadn't seen a bunch of people since the funeral They were all great but I do remember going in thinking I would get that awful pity look the whole time and people would avoid my like the plaque but got lots of hugs and a few small quiet toast on Don's honor (little bits of random tears)..then lots of fun distraction of a wonderful wedding PS love the comment of these meltdowns feeling like a drunk post ,,, so very true but also freeing