Virgo

I have a back piece that I want to add too. My mom passed away 3 months before Phil, so I want to add something for both of them.

My daughters being on spring break this week has definitely changed up my routine. I did manage to do some cardio today (stairs.)

My 7yo dd lost a tooth tonight. My 13yo dd helped her pull it out. That means I had tooth fairy duties because my 7yo still believes. I rarely carry cash these days because I always use my debit card. Well, sure enough I check my purse and no cash. What do I do? I grabbed a dollar bill from my 7yo's wallet. She'll never know. I'll sneak her another dollar the next time I have cash.

Family Birthdays sign without the dates/names attached. I do have them attached now.( Also, the dry erase frames.) I haven't started painting the bathroom yet, but I'm planning on buying paint tomorrow so I can paint Friday. I started cleaning and organizing in my scrapbooking/craft room today. What a mess! I can see the floor now though. Lol! Yes, it was that bad!

I wore my wedding ring a few times, but for me it was a constant reminder of what was lost and no longer was. I decided to have my diamond solitaire set into a heart pendant so I could still wear my 'ring', but in a different way. I love it! I kept my bands as is and will always keep them. I wear my anniversary ring on my middle finger and I'm planning on getting a mother's ring to wear with it. Phil gave me a mother's ring after our second daughter was born. Whoops, who knew! I think this time I'll add our birthstones and make it a family ring. Maybe have our names engraved inside the ring.

My mother in-law and I say this to each other all of the time, "it still doesn't feel real." I wonder if it ever will? I still half expect to see him to come around the corner in his squad car just before our youngest daughter gets on the bus in the morning so he can give her a hug and a kiss. I suppose I 'see' him everywhere. I miss him so much.

My 7yo daughter just told me that she will NOT date a boy that eats at McDonald's. Fast food is gross! She has her priorities straight. haha

Happy Easter everyone!

That has to be the worst thing a person could say to a grieving parent. I'm so sorry you were subjected to that insensitive idiot.

Visiting the cemetery isn't high on my priority list. That might sound awful, but it's just part of my grieving process. It wasn't for Phil either. For me, it's just not him. I feel his presence more at home. Honestly, I would have preferred having Phil cremated. Three reasons why I didn't. He never voiced wanting to be cremated, I wanted him to have a traditional police burial, and I knew his parents would want to visit his grave. I know it's an important part of the grieving process for some. It definitely is for my in-laws. I think they visit weekly. My plan is to visit the cemetery on holidays and special days when my daughters are ready.

I was thinking today too that I wish our schedules were more open.

I didn't make the birthday sign. A friend of mine makes signs and I told her exactly what I wanted. I love how it turned out. I just filled in the birthdays. I'll see if I can figure out how to share a photo. I'm still working on getting ready for our city garage sale. I'm also working on small projects. Illness is going through our house, so I haven't been very productive. My daughters have spring break next week, so I'm hoping to paint their bathroom. My goal for this week is to not get sick!! (haha)

I've really been slacking lately. Illness going through our house. My middle daughter was sick last week, and my oldest is sick this week. I should just sneak off to the gym, but my mom guilt won't let me. I need it! I miss it! I really hope my youngest daughter and I don't get sick.

I'm more about inner beauty for me. I could find a man attractive, but be completely turned off once I start having a conversation with him. It's the 'whole package' as my late husband would say.

Casual sex isn't as awful, awkward, or empty as I thought it would be. Maybe I'm more at ease because he's a friend. It's exactly what I need at the moment. I'm not ready to give myself completely to someone else.

Nice tribute to your LH. Hopefully their bio-dad will honor their decision.

I completely understand, and never say anything negative, but I'm not going to lie. It really hurts to hear my daughters' comments on how they think their dad would have said or done differently in certain situations. I feel that I have a pretty good idea how he would react to most situations. We rarely differed in parenting decisions. My oldest daughter (15) is sick. She's a little whining and demanding when she's sick. She wants me to cuddle with her because she's cold. She's asking me and her sisters to get her this or that, so she doesn't have to move from the couch. I'm sorry, but I have two other daughters to take care of. I don't have the luxury of laying on the couch with her for 10 hours. She's claiming that her dad would be snuggled on the couch with her. Complete opposite! He treated us like walking germs when we were sick. I'll admit that while I am motherly, I do not coddle my girls. My parents were the same, "get up and move around a bit. You might feel better." Partly my personality, partly my upbringing. This isn't the first time she has mentioned 'what dad would have done', but just an example. How do you handle those type of situations with your kids? Sometimes I just listen. Other times I will say how I think he would have reacted or what he might have said. Then sometimes I say I wish that he was hear to give his opinion/advice, but he's not so I have to make the best decisions for our family.

Congratulations!

Questions your house has a nice curb appeal. The tree looks nice. I like your side walk and front windows. I accomplished a small project today. I hung my Family Birthdays sign (finally) and filled in all of the birthdays. I framed scrapbooking paper in two metal photo frames to hang above the birthday sign to use as 'white boards.' I like how it turned out. It feels good to mark things off of my list. Even if it's just a small project. I'm hoping to get another project done after dinner.

I finally got my taxes filed. It cost me, but it's done. H&R Block is expensive. I'm getting a decent return from the Feds, but I had to pay quite a bit to the state. Fun, fun! Mark it off my list!!

Today I went to have lunch with my 7yo daughter (2nd grader.) One of the boys in our neighborhood is also in 2nd grade. He came up to me and said, "tell Abby I'm sorry her dad died." Even though it caught me off guard I thought it was sweet. I didn't tell my daughter though.

I felt that it was TMI, and I talked to my dad about it. Not only was it TMI, but it was sort of a 'bomb' announcement. Completely off topic. Just odd, like he was bursting to share. I think he learned his lesson. He said he would keep any future lady friends on the 'down low.' lol

My family is very open and honest. Sometimes I wonder if we're to open. My daughters are 15, 13, and 7. I constantly worry about my 7yo being bombarded with an overload of inappropriate (for her age) information. It can be a difficult balance. Especially when my older two don't always consider their younger sister's listening ears.

Well maybe it's not unique, but I'm sure it's fairly uncommon. My mom died just three months before my husband. She had ALS. My dad mentioned that he recently started dating two women, but they're both more of a 'friends with benefits' type of situation. I caught on to that right away, but my daughters did not. Why my dad mentioned it in front of them is beyond me. I wish he would have talked to me about it privately first. When he first brought the topic of dating up in front of my girls they seemed open to it. Once they figured out that he was seeing more than one woman and staying with them on the weekends their opinions changed. They are relentless with asking him questions. What are their names? How old are they? Where do they live? Do they have children/grandchildren? I told them it's really none of their business and they need to lighten up on the questioning a bit. I could tell their questions were making him uncomfortable. He obviously didn't think that through very well. Later on we talked privately. He's still aching for my mom. He can only handle being with these women occasionally because he misses my mom. Anyway, his dating has opened up conversations between me and my daughters. I can talk about my dad, but I know they are thinking about me too. The possibility of me dating. In a sense, how I want them to treat my dad is how I hope they treat me too. When they ask me questions about my dad I know they are also asking about me. It's just not as difficult to ask me the question if it's about my dad. If that makes sense. It's an odd situation, never something I thought I would go through with my dad, but in some ways it's helping me and my daughters.

Hvnbound- If it's difficult for you to let go of the t-shirts you could always have a t-shirt quilt made for yourself. Just an idea. I kept all of my LH's t-shirts. He had enough for all three of our daughters to have a quilt made. They're being made right now. They can't wait to see them! Dentist appointments (check!)