momtokam Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 Meeting for coffee is less scary to me than handing out my phone number. When you meet for coffee, it's in public and there is plenty of help available if my date seems dangerous in person. So far, I've been lucky in that my dates have turned out to be as safe in person as they seemed online. I don't give out more than my first name before I've met a person face to face. It seems too dangerous to me because with either piece of information, you can get back to my address with very little work. Agreed MrsK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 All you can do is keep trying. Unless you are sending out first messages that say something like "Nice hair, let's meet in person so I can smell it." which I am pretty sure you aren't! That kind of message would scare off most women, I think. ^^^ LOVE this! I laughed so hard, my stomach hurts. ;D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momtokam Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 All you can do is keep trying. Unless you are sending out first messages that say something like "Nice hair, let's meet in person so I can smell it." which I am pretty sure you aren't! That kind of message would scare off most women, I think. ^^^ LOVE this! I laughed so hard, my stomach hurts. ;D This was joking I am sure but I have received the following as a first message on a dating site...... "I love your hair! I would love to shampoo it for you." And no, I did not respond! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momtojandj Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 We should start a thread on crazy responses we have gotten, I had a guy ask me in first email ever , if I had nice feet and could he rub them ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsK Posted March 12, 2015 Share Posted March 12, 2015 This was joking I am sure but I have received the following as a first message on a dating site...... "I love your hair! I would love to shampoo it for you." And no, I did not respond! Oh no! I was trying to pick something so crazy and it wasn't even close to your reality. I guess I am luckier with online dating than I thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imissdow Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I did online dating for about 16 months. Met about 10 guys for coffee/dinner/whatever. I usually would e-mail them for at least a week. By that point I had a pretty good idea of if they were who they were claiming to be. I did meet my share of scammers and married guys. Most of these I figured out in that 1 week time. If a guy asked me to meet early on I would typically reply that I would be happy to meet them for coffee after I got to know them a little better say in a week or so. That way a guy knew what time frame I was looking at. I did have a couple of guys tell me that this was to long and I was wasting their time, most however were fine with this a we sent a few e-mails back and forth and then I would usually suggest meeting at a local coffee shop within a week or 2. A few gave me their number I don't think I ever gave them mine to begin with. If I felt like it after meeting we would exchange numbers. I think I only had 3 second dates and only 1 got a third. Most of the time I was really glad I had taken a little extra time at the beginning and not given out my phone number . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vettie Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 For me, if I was going to give out my number, I would like to get to know someone before I meet them. I would not want to text as alot can be lost through just typed words. Also, I find texting annoying. I can say it quicker than I can type it. So call and talk to me already, lol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HvnBound Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 After a few messages back and forth I would give them my Google Voice number so we could talk. If we became an item then I would simply say I changed my phone number and would give them my real phone number. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaP Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 What if you try something like this: "I'm interested in getting to know you better. What setting would you feel most comfortable with? If I'm rushing things, please let me know. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable in any way." I have almost no experience with the online dating thing either - so I am probably not the best person to ask. I am only going by what I'd like to hear if I were on the receiving end... Good luck! Donna Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
serpico Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Try this one..."Maybe we could get together and just eat a bunch of caramels." If she doesn't know what you're talking about then it's probably best you avoid her anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DonnaP Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Try this one..."Maybe we could get together and just eat a bunch of caramels." If she doesn't know what you're talking about then it's probably best you avoid her anyway. And if she looks at you funny, just say: "Well, it's just as arbitrary as drinking coffee, if you think about it." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mel4072 Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I prefer the "would you like to meet" before giving out numbers. I am very timid when it comes to online dating and dating in general. I had several guys tell me that I was weird bc I didn't want to exchange numbers. Their loss. Giving out my number gives out a lot of other info about me. Address and such. The www gives people access to a lot of personal info. I have a 16 yr old daughter to protect. And myself. More worried about the daughter though. So, the one dude who said "ok, that's unusual but that's fine because I'd like to meet you." I called him and we talked for about an hour. Then I was sure that I wanted to meet him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carey Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 One thing about myself that drives me crazy? I HATE, literally DESPISE talking on the phone. I don't even really know why, Its funny because I met DH on the phone lol And I was in Texas and he was in NC and that was before cell phones and all that so we talked. And talked and talked. So much we ran up both phone bills so bad I just had to move back here. So I don't know why I don't like it now. I will say Im more receptive to talking on the phone after Ive met someone in person. But I really am starting to hate this stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeff1973 Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I really think I would prefere to skip the dating game if it's just the same to the world.. I'm certain I would like to wake up one day and find that I am married to a beautiful, confident, talented, loving, "normal", outgoing, schnauzer loveing, Lady!! Wait a minute, I had that once,,, It was not a dream.. She is gone now.. But this NIGHTMARE continues,, It never seems to end.... Jeff1973 Typo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrBanner Posted March 19, 2015 Author Share Posted March 19, 2015 What if you try something like this: "I'm interested in getting to know you better. What setting would you feel most comfortable with? If I'm rushing things, please let me know. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable in any way." I have almost no experience with the online dating thing either - so I am probably not the best person to ask. I am only going by what I'd like to hear if I were on the receiving end... Good luck! Donna That's good. Comfortable is the key. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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