ladybug Posted December 12, 2015 Share Posted December 12, 2015 Since I have been a widow for many years, I have been trying to get used to missing him on the holidays. BUT......it still hurts this time of year. I will be glad when January 2 rolls around. I hate this time of year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest running with scissors Posted December 12, 2015 Share Posted December 12, 2015 It's really hard,for me too. Christmas was a special time for us. I miss him so much. It does hurt, I will never get use to him not being here. I know how you feel, I hope you have Peace this Holiday season. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted December 12, 2015 Share Posted December 12, 2015 yes I agree so much this is my second Christmas with out my don and its so much harder this year glad to have people like you guys who know how it feels and how hard it is Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torn Posted December 13, 2015 Share Posted December 13, 2015 I miss my Wife terribly, this us my 2nd Christmas without her Holidays will never be the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TMPPGH Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 I agree this is my 2nd holiday season and it's unbearable to me! I use to love the holidays now I hate them! For me I have 6 months of torture. My birthdays in October, thanksgiving in Nov, Christmas, December, New Years January, Todd birthday and Valentine's Day, and then the anniversary of his passing is in March. I just want to hibernate for these months! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
swilson Posted December 14, 2015 Share Posted December 14, 2015 Agree, 2nd time without her. Try to keep spirit up around family but it's only a fa?ade. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jlp Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 As always, so glad to know I'm not alone. This is my second Christmas, too, and it is awful. Feeling so sad and lonely. I think last year was easier only because I was still in shock. Now reality has set in and it sucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freelancing Posted December 15, 2015 Share Posted December 15, 2015 There hasn't been a day that has gone by without thinking or mentally talking to DH. I don't know why but suddenly its like I can feel his presence. I keep catching myself talking out loud asking him about presents, cookies, ornaments, etc.This is the first year this has happened. Other years it was grin and bear it, later on I just hid away long enough for a short cry, but not this time. I think I'll just keep yakking away as if he's here physically. Poor guy probably thought he was going get away from my blabbering in his ear! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torn Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 There hasn't been a day that has gone by without thinking or mentally talking to DH. I don't know why but suddenly its like I can feel his presence. I keep catching myself talking out loud asking him about presents, cookies, ornaments, etc.This is the first year this has happened. Other years it was grin and bear it, later on I just hid away long enough for a short cry, but not this time. I think I'll just keep yakking away as if he's here physically. Poor guy probably thought he was going to away from my blabbering in his ear! I've been feeling a excess void aswell,almost Luke I lost touch again,obviously I haven't. I've written it up to the excess stress around what used to be my home. It's definitely a tough set of circumstances for us all. So all I can do is wish each of you all some peace and enough good memories to not drown in but to simply reminisce in the little moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carey Posted December 17, 2015 Share Posted December 17, 2015 Chad died on November 23rd ... thanksgiving week so I was flung straight into the storm of the holiday season immediately with fresh widowhood. But I decorated and cooked and had "normal" Christmas that year. I did it on autopilot and I was very numb I think. He'd been in Saudi for 9 months so his absence didn't feel all that strange; so my brain must have pretended he was still out there somewhere. Last year was TERRIBLE but I did manage to decorate and do the family thing. This year, should have been easier yet I still don't have a decorated Christmas tree and not the first shred of outdoor Christmas , nor have I done cards or baked or any of that stuff. I feel ruined Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted December 20, 2015 Share Posted December 20, 2015 This year, for the first time, I put a wreath on my husband's grave at the veterans' cemetery. This will also be the first time I've put up a Christmas tree since DH died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted December 20, 2015 Share Posted December 20, 2015 This is my 2nd Christmas, without Kenneth. My life is so different, now. I have New Guy to spend the holidays with; and together, he and I decorated his place, and mine. My children and family are thousands of miles away, so New Guy and I have a quiet holiday planned, with just the two of us. I love how peaceful things are with him. Still, I think of my Kenneth each and every day, and I miss his exuberance over the holidays. I've reached a point, though, where missing him is no longer front and center. Thoughts of him are more nostalgic and sentimental; and I can take quiet moments to reflect on my life with him, without the grief completely taking over. There are times when I shed a few tears, but I am no longer immobilized and racked with grief from missing him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patriciad Posted December 20, 2015 Share Posted December 20, 2015 This is my 7th Christmas without him. I don't know where that time has gone. I have remarried, have a house full of people, who I love, living with me. I am getting used to this whole new life and, for the most part, embracing it and all the blessings that I have. But...all I have to hear is Karen Carpenter singing "Merry Christmas Darling" and my mind goes back to Christmases of long ago when he was here. I really miss him at this time of year. Pat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marian53 Posted December 20, 2015 Share Posted December 20, 2015 Peter died on 1/1/2007, so I like the 2nd, too. Huge hugs Marian Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nonesuch Posted December 20, 2015 Share Posted December 20, 2015 We decorated the tree today. I said nothing, but felt a tiny pang, when Current Beau placed LH's favorite ornament on the tree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linda5 Posted December 21, 2015 Share Posted December 21, 2015 This will be my 3rd Christmas without my DH. It's not as sad as last year. Bought a smaller tree, decorated with ornaments that mean nothing to me. I guess I'm just indifferent this holiday season; I feel like I've got a big void in my life and I just don't know how to fill it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jess Posted December 21, 2015 Share Posted December 21, 2015 Like a few in this thread, this is also my second Christmas. It feels not as devastating as last year did, but a lot of memories have been coming back about our holidays together and how much I loved surprising him. I guess the best words are melancholy and reflective. We always said we would exchange gifts Christmas morning but I would always get so excited to give him his presents I'd get him to open just one Christmas Eve, which then turned into no self control at all and me getting him to open everything Christmas Eve. There we would sit in a pile of crumpled up wrapping paper and he'd say to me "Now look what you did!" and would laugh. I loved it and I miss it. He had such a fun sense of whimsy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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