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MissingJoan
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Guest TormentedTwoStep

Once my wife and I were married, she was t much on making out. She wanted to get right to business and have me go for a rough poke in the whiskers. I miss long make out sessions too. The kind that go for hours and get the blood pumping g and build the anticipation.

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Guest TormentedTwoStep

The weather has turned a bit cold here.  Seeing as it's the weekend, it sure would be nice to have someone to help me steam up the windows in the house!

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Have not posted in a while. I believe that I am in a place where I can live side by side as a widow, and as someone that is ready to live and love again. All along I have missed intimacy from the little things to the big things.  However, now I have a crush on someone. Now intimacy has a face....and a body...and it is all I can think of.

 

The man of my affections is 12 years my senior. Had a loveless marriage, is getting divorced, and selling his house. He has a lot going on. In subtle ways he has definitely flirted with me. I am unsure if he is ready to date. Sometimes I wonder if he just does not know how far out a widow has to be to be approached. Sometimes I feel like he is interested, but assumes I'm not because of age and situation. When I do see him, I'm with my oldest daughter who is 18. We have never been able to really talk alone. I occasionally text him, and he does respond. But he has said several times that he does not text much at all. I'm in no rush.

 

The problem, I'm in constant arousal. I can't stop thinking about doing things to this man, and he to me. I swoon in my head. I catch my breath. I have so much, " energy," right now that I exercise a lot. It helps. Anyone else living this life in their head?!

 

My plan. I'm taking care of myself. Losing weight, 25 lbs so far. Using kegel weights to tighten the pelvic floor. Sorry those, "Pee Happens," commercials scare the crap out of me. When I actually do have sex ,I want to go through the roof, and knock someone's socks off.

 

Thanks, I really needed to get this out there.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

I do.. Slow progress. Almost too slow. Now he has competition. Competition came out of nowhere. Competition has been saying and doing all the right things. So much...that I'm going on a date tomorrow. I like him. I'm excited. I think I'm going to get a kiss out of this. I. Can't. Wait. Who knew something so simple as the thought of a kiss could be... Tantalizing.

Thank you asking.

It is nice to share

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I had seen this thread but hadn't visited. Now glad I have  :D

So I decided to try online dating. Having never done it before, I found it sort of unnerving, particularly when people I had absolutely no interest in tried to chat me up. However, there is one incredible guy who I've been texting and talking to that revs up the engine. I've never been one to take pictures of myself but I have for him -- nothing that will get me in trouble but it's still strange to find myself doing anything like that. I feel like I'm going to pass out when he says he's going to take a shower. I showed his picture to my dearest friend and all she could say was 'Yum'  ;D I am praying it's not a game and that one day soon we'll meet in person. God and I are having some serious conversations about what's gonna happen on that date ...

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hahaha, love this thread! Wish I had something spicy to add to all the levity...but unfortunately, for the time being, something else in me died with the passing of my beloved wife...

 

Some brief background...

 

From the time we met, Debs and I hit it off like the proverbial house on fire: we were compatible in just about every way imaginable, emotionally, intellectually, physically - oh yeah, we had a very healthy and energetic sex life. Before our older girl was born, we would have it 3-4 times a day, sneaking out at lunch from her and my work to imbibe! The frequency dropped off a little with the advent of the second daughter but we still had the hots for each other at least 4-5 times a week right up until her diagnosis.

 

In the last 13 months, I've had opportunities to just do the physical stuff with females I've met through golf, work, social outings etc...but I have backed away each time for no reason other than it did not feel right, that it felt as if I was betraying her. What made it worse was that each of the females involved bore some physical resemblance to my beloved - tall, slim. They still keep in touch with me but there's no developments in the foreseeable future from my end...

 

I might be celibate for a few years yet LOL!!

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  • 1 month later...

My husband died about 14 months ago, taking into account the time he was sick I haven't had sex for over two years. I didn't think I would ever even want it again but for the last two months haven't been able to think about anything else! I'm constantly checking out dads at school, male patients, work colleagues......imagining what it would be like. Amazing how badly you want something when it's off the table.

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It's been 2 years, three months, and one week since I had sex. I'm climbing out of my skin! I jokingly told my therapist last week that I should find a hook up on Tinder and be done with it. She agreed with me! Then she said she was embarrassed to even suggest such a thing, but it might help!

 

Sigh. I'm just not that brave. :-/

 

 

ETA: My 1000th post. Great. Lol.

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I've been told to do that too but just don't have the confidence in myself. This is so bad.....there's another family at school who lost their mum earlier this year, I've even thought well he's in the same boat as me so maybe he might be interested.......isn't that terrible. I don't want another husband or boyfriend just a shag!

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I don't think it's even so much about the physicality (although it would be great!) also about just feeling desired and wanted again.

 

Absolutely, that's a huge part of it. They've almost become separate issues for me. I think I crave emotional intimacy more than physical. I've found some creative ways to meet that need-- a close friendship with another wid, leaning on my theatre group and some of my coworkers more than I should, and (I'm embarrassed to admit this) participating in an online chat group.  :-[ It all helps, but it's not perfect. And then there's the physical side of it... aigh.

 

I miss being safe in my husband's arms and heart and bed. I didn't think I'd ever have to worry about this bullshit, but here I am, floundering around trying to make sense of life as a single person in her 40s. It sucks. And I'm still experiencing skin hunger like you wouldn't believe... except most of you probably would.  :-\

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