BrokenHeart2

Thank you for asking. I'm so tired of this struggle. This too shall pass. Thanks for asking. I'll be ok.

Done.... Doesn't matter

MA that is hilarious

Hey Nuggets, twist my rubber arm I have an Eddie Bauer jacket that DH bought me! I love it but not enough to stay in these frigid winters. I'm thinking of heading to Costa Rica this winter!

Sounds like the Mom partner is a tad of a nightmare. Glad to hear about your Mom living in Costa Rica sounds like a dream. I hope to also day! Another Canadian hoping to dodge these horrid winters.

If nothing becomes of this it sounds like you had a nice time with him! Best of luck to you!

God bless your DH for taking care of business with the will. My DH did the same to make sure the ex and one other didn't try anything. He made sure it was iron clad and I am thankful for that now. We built everything together and we always said everything will go to each other. I love my stepkids as if they are my own and he knew that I would always take care of them should anything happen. I try to get others to do a will but they just think like maybe many of us used to think.

Hey MS I do that kind of math thing in my head too. For me with my DH husband everything is 30. With my Dad death 26 yrs ago the number was 3. Weird.

I'm about to attend my first wedding Oct 31 without him but his ex will be there. Ugh stepson is best man and sdaught is a bridesmaid. Tomorrow is the bridal shower that sdaught can't stay at for work reasons, I'm dropping of the gift and 15 hydrangeas from my garden for the tables.... I'm done!!

TJ, I deactivated my fb account months go and I am so thankful I did that. I saw phoney bs life events when I know that their lives are so full of shit. I was thinkinking how difficult my life is and why? Facebook is Fakebook to me. They all post shiny happy events when shit is happening to them to but just don't post it Who needs that? Social media sucks as time goes on. I'm done buying the bullshit. Ill just do my best living one day at a time OFF line! Hey we survived without the internet before it came, we can do it now too.

Thank-you to all of you! At 2 yrs 3 months I now don't feel so out of touch. This sure is a crazy mindf..k of a time.

Hey NT. I find I get really nervous about interviews if I really want the job. Nothing to add for advice because the others before me gave great advice. For me writing helps to get it out of my head to calm the override in the brain . You've got this!!!

Catch 22 for sure. I hope you get some clarity/comfort (heck I don't know) from seeing him. I know talking with one helpedme last year. How happy can happy get......CG nailed it. May we some day come to place where we have peace and yes...even happiness. Afterall we deserve it don't we. I know DH would say YES!

Hey Mikeeh, I hear you and feel the same as well. A CS Lewis quote I've read here before "Her/(His) death is like the sky, it covers everything". When I read that it really resonated with me because it's so true. I miss all those little things being with that one key person who loves you and you love like no other. That one that just 'gets you' and can have those small mundane thoughts to share randomly. Hugs to you!

Yup, I so get what you are saying MG and it really sucks!

Yup...WTF happened, he is supposed to be here. I am having changes and when it feels good I feel like I'm sucked into a grief vortex. WTF?

MS, I was accepted within a week so just a heads up. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

So sorry about your dog MS. When I lost DH my 5 yr old lab died 4 months later. I was devastated. My heart strings tugged too. 3 months later I almost got a rescue. The day for pick up I backed out. Thankfully the lady I was dealing with was a widow and she was wonderful. I realized I just wasn't ready. Only you know. Best of luck with your decision either way. Hugs

Hey JJ your statement of ' I have a metric ton of love to give' was a wonderful statement of who you are. What a great way to put it! I feel that way too!

I've taken on the mantra for a while now since loosing DH "what other people think of you is none of your business". I just don't give a shit what they think. Until they have walked a mile in my shoes, unless I ask their opinion I think in my head 'yeah, whatever'. I think my siblings are finally getting it.

Thank you. I pray to get to the place when I could just "have a good day". That simple.

double post, not sure why, par for the course in my stupid ship try life I guess!

Fuck Em all! Stupid nonsense and stupid people! Fuck Em! Blows and sucks is right. Yup, I'm feeling a tad of anger right now. Thanks for letting me spew it.

Why has it been when I've had a good day when I'm here alone at night it feels so bad? I'm so tired of this. I'm working hard to keep going but it's so frustrating 2 steps forward and 4 steps back. I miss him so much and it's so hard to keep those steps going.

The day before my DH died he said to me out of the blue "the only constant in life is change". He knew change was hard for me and this has resonated with me and helped to try to adapt with the constant change my life (all of our lives) has been since. Sounds like you are focusing on the really important stuff right now and that is terrific. I hope your move brings comfort, peace and happiness to you and your family. Hugs