linda5

JustMom, your post resonated with me on so many levels. My husband also died suddenly 2 1/2 years ago and I can see God's hands were on my daughters and I preparing us. I've told people that I was spitting bullets at God when He called my husband home. I was so angry with God and stayed that way for about 2 1/2 months. I could feel God trying to get close to me and give me comfort, but I was so angry and wouldn't let God get close to me. I wanted God to watch me suffer. Then, when I was finally ready to accept His love and comfort, I felt it. Still don't understand why my husband of 35 years was taken from me when we had the best marriage of anybody I know. It's still hard. Our three daughters are all married now, with two of them living on two different coasts. I look forward to a time when I can truly have joy back in my life. I can function now ... just missing the real joy in life. Hope to find that soon.

Lost on ambition when my husband died. Now I"m just coasting until I retire. But, I also lost all of my life dreams when he died. I don't know what I want my future to hold. We had a plan for the future ... but I (as one singular person) did not. It's a little more than 2 1/2 years out for me, and I just plug one day along after the last.

Will. He was my world, my life. He took a part of me with him when he departed. He was the best father to our three daughters. He always said that you criticize in private, and praise in public. He taught me how to be a better parent. I miss him so much and would give the world to have him back. He was always writing me love notes, even after 35 years of marriage ... and whenever I'm having a bad day, I pull some out and they help me smile again.

Mike, I'm so sorry for all the pain you're experiencing right now. My beloved husband also died suddenly. His was from a pulmonary embolism...right in front of our daughters and me. It's now 2 1/2 years out, and I marvel that I somehow survived without my other half. I'm not going to lie to you. Surviving is difficult, and the pain can knock you to your knees. But somehow, some way, you see a sparkle of light just for a second ... then a shaft of light comes in. This all takes time. I will never be the person I was before he died, but I'm finding some peace and happiness. And, I don't have a boyfriend. I had the best out there for me, and I'm now thankful for the time we did have together. Just hang on. This community got me through the toughest days of my life and it can do the same for you.

I don't know ... I think I would try to get a real commitment from PB neighbor! Something about him wins me over!

It's been a little over 2 1/2 years since my husband died, and I'm just now feeling like I can go to venues with others. The problem that I experienced is that I told everyone "no" for so long, I'm hardly asked now.

I also want to thank you for sharing your story. Hope ... it's the thing I cling to!

I also wouldn't quit. I'd let them terminate me so I could get unemployment. He can always say he was let go due to downsizing.

SVS, tomorrow is my 2 1/2 years without the love of my life. Don't you just hate all the reminders that make us realize again just how much we miss them? What a beautiful wedding photo of the two of you!

Well hello AC! I never really posted a lot, but I truly missed you too, as I did a lot of head nodding on your posts!

Isn't it great to know that Tim is still with you? Loved your story and Tim was quite a guy! \

Jen, I'm feeling the same way. All my big events are now over ... daughters married ... seems everyone has moved on ... except my heart. I'm now at 2 1/2 years, and I want somebody to hold me, kiss me, talk to me, watch TV with, etc. I'm told I'm attractive for my age, but I've got nobody in my life. I just don't want to put the work into finding someone. I just want God to have somebody knock on my door and tell me that he's my person!

Your story brought a smile to my face and a hug to my heart. I know our loved ones are still watching over us and hoping we catch the signs they send us.

You handled the situation well. I'm speechless. I can't believe they would presume they could talk for you.

Made it through my daughter's wedding without falling apart. Wanted to be strong for my girls. All our girls are married now. Missed my DH so very much, but I held it together!

I don't know if I'll ever really be able to "let it go."

So happy for you! Yours and your husband's hard work paid off. You got the job!!! Enjoy your success, as you earned it!

Just want you to know that you've got my prayers too.

Fran, you're in my prayers. I am now at 2 1/2 years without the love of my life. I know it doesn't help you now, but it does get easier. Just hang on. Your friends and family won't get it, and they shouldn't because they didn't have to experience this kind of loss. Know that what you are feeling is normal ... cry when you want; yell, scream ... anything to get those emotions out. My first year was hell, the second wasn't much better, but now I'm functioning. I'm praying for you. Keep posting and reading.

Beautiful! Congratulations and may you be blessed with a very happy life!

I attended Grief Share and it did help me. I recommend it.

Jen, that's a rough day. I'm so sorry for the loss of both your fur babies. They are family.

Here is a poem my husband wrote to our daughters about 3 years before he died suddenly: My Changing Heart By: Wilfred Bereswill She fits in my hand, Flying through the room, giggling her silly giggle, This is the best time, My heart is filling. She chases a ball, With twenty others, giggling her determined giggle, This is the best time, My heart is content. She snuggles on my lap, Watching men skate on ice, giggling her amazed giggle, This is the best time, My heart is full. She arranges her dorm room, Hanging clothes on a rack, giggling a nervous giggle, This is the best time, for her, My heart is unsure. She walks in white, Taking her hand from mine, giggling a silent giggle, This is the best and worst time, My heart is empty. She takes a tiny hand, And places it in mine, giggling along with a silly giggle, This is the best time, My heart is filling again. (This is especially meaningful to me right now, as our last daughter gets married Sept. 5th.) The only part he didn't get to experience was holding our grandbaby while alive.

Dan's Soulmate, My boss gave me "Jesus Calling." He gave it to me about one year before my husband died suddenly. Read what it says on March 24th, the day God called my husband home. God told me right there that I was going to lose someone I love, and give them to God. That book has been spot on for me too!

It took me a little over a year after my husband's death before I was strong enough to see the lawyer and change our will into a trust. Now, I feel more confident that my girls know where all my assets are, and what I want done. I hated doing it, but once it's finished I got a great relief feeling.