SoVerySad Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 I was on Pinterest the other day looking for easy one-hand recipes when I came across this: [imghttp://][/img] I had this. It was so incredible. Honestly, I know I was so fortunate as many will never know the joy and sense of fulfillment a relationship like this brings. I especially love the last line. Life threw us a lot of difficult circumstances, but our love never diluted. And it still hasn't. And I think that's why I am struggling so much. I still feel married, but he can't be here. It is painful and there is an intense dissonance in something I have loved so much and for so long ( just shy of 30 years) now causing such pain as well. I have been going through a very difficult few weeks. The resulting restrictions from my accident (still unable to drive and such limited movement in my wrist/hand) have given me way too much idle time to think. The police report confirms the guy who hit us was drunk. It hurts to realize there is no one else who shares my level of angst that one or both of my children could have been killed by the actions of that bastard. Or they could have been left without either parent. My husband would understand the fear this all has left me with. He'd hold me and not try to make it seem insignificant. He would recognize my pain and share it. In two days it will be 2 years since T died suddenly. I know it really is just another day of the same. And yet, these anniversaries seem so big. I think, for me, it is because it is ushering me into yet another year without T here and physically present in my life. I miss him. This is my first post on this new board. My thanks to all those working hard to re-establish this lifeline. I'm hoping that I'll feel a little better once this anniversary passes and gets out of my head. Sending you all tight hugs... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrokenHeart2 Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 Sending you a big tight hug SVS. We hear you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest littlebirdie Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 In two days it will be 2 years since T died suddenly. I know it really is just another day of the same. And yet, these anniversaries seem so big. I think, for me, it is because it is ushering me into yet another year without T here and physically present in my life. I miss him. Anniversaries are tough because they bring it all back. What we had, what we lost, everything we've been through; not to mention everything you've been dealing with since your accident. Those what ifs are so much bigger and scarier when you're the only parent left alive. It's a very stressful place to be. Lots of love to you, SVS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadiangirl Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 Sending you hugs, SVS. Hope you can get through the next few days okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carey Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 That's beautiful. You're really an amazing person, I hope you know that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virgo Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 I had this too. Everyone that was interviewed after his death mentioned his infectious laughter. Sending you ((hugs)) SVS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max2507 Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 Yes, I had this too. So wonderful. Had a little cry after reading it because it sums it up. I am coming up on 2 years in May and his birthday later this month. Its still so hard. I can't imagine having an accident and injury and such on top it all, just thinking of you and sending hugs across the cyberspace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Kamcho Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr C Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 SVS, I am sorry that you have had so much turmoil recently. Everything is harder without your spouse and best friend. Thank you for sharing this quote. I can so relate to it and your opening paragraph. It is good to see you on here. Sending you (((HUGS))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 ((((((SVS))))))) I was lucky enough to have this too. Sometimes... in my darkest moments... I wish I hadn't, because then I wouldn't have to endure the pain of losing it. Of course I don't mean it... I don't think... I'm so glad you made it here, and I hope your recovery is going smoothly. Are you loving your new vehicle? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lcoxwell Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 It is so good to see you again, though I am very sorry that you have had a difficult few weeks and that you are facing the anniversary of losing your love at the same time. I'm also sorry that the actions of one ignorant drunkard had to tear up your life so completely and that you no longer have your other half to share you pain and fear with. Anyway, sending you tight, tight cyber hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chopperette Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 (((((SVS))))) We are going to make it. Sunday it's going to be here in a blink of an eye and we will be fine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsMisterman Posted March 20, 2015 Share Posted March 20, 2015 (((SVS))) Your post resonated so much with me. I feel like you reached into my head this morning and wrote down all my feelings. I'm going on 3 years next month, and the feelings of longing for what was and mourning the loss of what should have been are still so strong for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissingSquish Posted March 21, 2015 Share Posted March 21, 2015 Huge hugs SVS. Anniversaries are so tough. Thinking about you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SimiRed Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 I had it too... just shy of 20 years. I miss it terribly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gabzmom Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 Huge hugs, SVS... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donswife Posted March 24, 2015 Share Posted March 24, 2015 I had this also for 27 years . we knew each other so well and the worst part is he would be the one comforting me the best with this pain(only been 5 months) I am so sorry about your accident and can t even imagine how hard it is for you with the physical pain and anger towards the reckless person that caused the accident and missing your best friend and husband who also would have been the first person to help you through this ,makes it that much harder . take care and hope today is a little better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trying2breathe Posted March 25, 2015 Share Posted March 25, 2015 Big (((hugs))) SVS - thank you for sharing these beautiful words, and hope that you have some peaceful days very soon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ursula Posted April 10, 2015 Share Posted April 10, 2015 ...weeks later... I hope you made it through those days ok. Wonderful quote...sums it all up... I am sorry you have still problems because of that accident. I hope it will be better soon. Glad you made it onto this new board too. I was late as well, but realised how much I missed it, as soon as I was back here. Hang in there, sending many hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linda5 Posted April 15, 2015 Share Posted April 15, 2015 Hugs to you SVS! How is your wrist/hand doing now? (I also had a husband who was my best friend. I got a wonderful 35 1/2 years of marriage with him and I still wasn't done with him!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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