Needytoo

So far so good. I have never met anyone like this man. Last night we went to the movies, this random touchy stuff is doing things to my body that I thought had stopped forever.

We went for a walk and then sat and watched the waves. This time I didn't jump out of my skin when he went to hold my hand. I count that as progress. He is a very touchy guy always touching my arm or my leg I could get very use to this.

He already contacted me. Not sure how Facebook does it but he showed up on my list of people you may know. Maybe he googled me first? Really hopeful on this one that I can get to the second date. Everything that I was looking for seems to be in this man. He is a very tall man and an overweight but he is willing to at least try some of the activities I like.

So far I can't say I ever had fun with an M&G until yesterday. We went for a walk and then out for supper. Had a great evening. Just will let things play out and stay calm. ;D

I am so sorry MissingSquish it is such a hard thing to do isn't it? When I finally got to the breaking point with my friend I too also felt relieved to let the friendship go.

I agree with BrokenHeart2, it's their issue. I went through so much anger during recovery and once in awhile it still pop outs. Venting does help and lord knows I have used these boards to vent but I also used these boards to help me heal and let go. Please don't take this the wrong way but working on ourselves (and time) does help with so many issues. There are so many things we need to learn about ourselves and it takes time. Hope some of this makes sense.

Yep pretty sure first guy was 61. lol The lady I know works at the same college I do but she is laid off for the summer. I don't think I can bring up the morbidty obese question. He husband was and committed suicide because of his depression with it. I maybe can ask around and see if anyone has her home number.

Hello everyone, had to give my little update in this weird thing we call online dating. Did go to a meet and greet awhile back. The guy was 61 years old and extremely nervous (I tend to scare the living “poop” out of guys, not sure why). He then would text me a million times a day. I swear I was trying to be open to all of this. Then he wanted to get together for coffee at 10:30 at night, sounded to me more like a booty call. Then he offered to drive me around in his truck. Just doesn’t sound exciting to me. So I stopped it, I forgot to mention his parents live with him. Now chatting with this other guy. He seems nice, he knows a woman I know who just happens to be a widow. He was their best man at their wedding. He keeps telling me he's a large man. Technically I am obese as well but pretty damn active I am a little worried that he is morbidly obese. He has two adopted boys 10 & 13. He told me last night he moved in with his Mom after his father’s passing in December. I have such mixed feelings on this.

I had a hard time with that as well. Hugs to you.

Added up what I have paid for the lawyer so far and then more for a trial and then, even more, to try to collect off a guy that has nothing. I was warned not to do this but I so much wanted this bastard contractor to pay. But it is draining me financially and mentally. I think I need to let this go. I will call my lawyer tomorrow and have the $200 conversation (she charges for everything) to stop the suit. My kids will ride my ass on this decision too. Let the contractor feel his victory, hopefully, karma gets him. You are so right TooSoon getting away does help. Unfortunately, we have had a lot of rain and I feel I can't do that. What I need to do is buy rubber boots and a better raincoat and get outside. I joined a kayak club and been complaining that I can't go because of the rain. Other members go out in the rain so I am going to do that too. I did start last weekend doing more visiting. I went to see my father in my hometown and had supper with old high school classmates that I haven't seen in 33 years. In two weeks off to see my old college friends. I need to break this stupid lonely/void feeling. Weird I am feeling lonely and complaining about my kids at the same time. Trying I am asking $400 a month, the same amount my parents asked for rent from me!! I hope he keeps up the paying because I have had it with him. He pays his own car insurance and I cancelled his cell phone. I did make him pay for his tuition and for his books but everything else I paid for when he was in school. Now that I work full time at the college my youngest tuition is paid for. Thinking about asking him to pay for car insurance to make it a little bit more fair. But honestly I am tired of catering to them both. That trailer is sounding so good to me. If I go ahead with it I don't think I will tell them, it will just be my secret. I can't believe I am saying that.

The answer to your question BrokenHeart2, about my freeloader son. is he feels entitled. He is a little prince. I have been on him for over a year to pay rent. He flat out refused. My grocery bill was up to $400 a week and I cut it in half and told them if they eat all the food they have to buy their own. When he finally paid he did say he realizes he has to start to pull his weight but then continued to drink all my coolers. He also walks around the house and makes annoying high-pitched sounds to annoy myself and his younger brother. He has starting vapping and refuses to go outside. I am sick of him. It is hard not to have DH to back me up. The zen den is looking very attractive.

My sons 19 & 22 years old live at home with me. I love my sons but they are really getting on my nerves. They often don’t clean up after themselves. They do some chores but never go out of their way to do too much. I have to hide any booze because they will just drink it on me. My oldest works full time and sometimes when he puts in overtime he is making the same amount as me. Finally, after a year of complaining, he paid me $400. Hopefully, that continues. My husband was an introvert and my sons tend to be like as well. Inviting people over doesn’t sit well with them. But we do have a close relationship, maybe too close I think they need to find their own way. Over the years I have made a few new friendships. One of these friendships I really cherished. She recommended this guy to do my weeping tiles. The man did everything wrong and I had to get it redone. I hate this man and am trying to sue him. I have spent a ton of money on a lawyer and now we are going to trial. Even if I win it is going to be a battle to get any money out of him because he has nothing. The stress from this and losing my friend has been draining. I have been feeling very lonely since winter. I would like to date but the online thing just not doing it. I feel I need to connect to more people. I am a social person but after the contractor friend thing, I tread slowly. It has been raining and that hasn’t helped my loneliness. One of my friends just bought a trailer in a campground and I was invited for the weekend. It is fantastic, I love camping and walking around and meeting new people. There is another trailer up for sale and I most likely can get a really good deal on it. But money is tight. I have the lawyer and still want to make a patio. Then my brain is thinking do I really want to go ahead with the lawsuit, or just end it and start to heal. Maybe I can take the money for my patio which maybe I would use an hour daily to buy the trailer. Then do I tell my kids or just keep it for myself. My personal zen den. I am so tired of picking up after them. Opinions please.

During my kayak lesson, the instructor touched my bare shoulder. It felt really great.

Thank you for sharing.

I also get this. I have been in a mental weird space since the beginning of winter. It isn't like I just sit at home, I get up go to work and also get out and do my hobbies, exercise activities, and some social activities. I have a few friends and try to get together once in a while. But this "thing" in my head is really getting on my nerves. I want to feel better. I am so sorry Remywife you are feeling this way. You are certainly not the only one.

Well, that is a good question. Now what is my answer. ??? Early in the journey I did share and maybe overshared and then got mad at people because I didn't like their response. Now I don't announce to the world I am a widow. I think the last time I did was 8 months ago. Is this a good or bad thing, especially when you would like to start to date again?

I haven't gone on too many M&G but never thought about leaving, but I have been stood up. The weird thing is the guy kept messaging me afterward and I was too nieve to say enough is enough. Next weekend I might go to a social club dance solo. I do so many things by myself, signed up for a weekend kayak trip that I will be going solo and I am thrilled but the thought of going away but this dance is bit terrifying. I agree Arneal this thing called dating is very complicated.

Big hugs to you Eileen. This is a hard journey, I can't lie about that. You are doing an excellent job, I struggle so much with doing the handyman duties around the house. It actually paralyzes me for some weird reason. A few weeks I was knocked totally down and it is taken awhile to recover. Remember to give your self-compassion and to love yourself.

When is the stupidity going to pass? I have been waiting for awhile.

I wondered if I was losing it, I must have posted right when you deleted your post. I don't think you were whiny at all. This summer I am working with two international students one from India and one from Brazil. They talk to their parents sometimes twice a day for at least an hour at a time. I seldom talk to my brother and sister and might talk to my father once a month for two minutes. There is something wrong with this. For some reason, my brother and sister and I can't remember each other's birthdays. Why are we so disconnected? Now let's look at Facebook. Why did your sister post that picture? She did it for sympathy? Why are we posting on Facebook for this? We are all looking for love and acceptance, but why the hell are we so afraid to do it? Facebook is now my huge experiment. My all the likes I get you would think I am very popular but the truth is I still have only a handful of close friends. There is my whine for the day.

I don't remember my dreams often but for some reason when I do I have to dream the same thing at least three times. I have only had one dream once of my husband. I was at a wedding. Everyone was sitting about beautiful round tables except for me. I was sitting at an old rotting picnic table in the middle of the room alone. I saw my husband he and everyone completely ignored me. Hope to never have that one ever again.

This family disconnect is a huge problem, it is in my family as well. I wonder if they could step in our shoes for just an hour if they would change. I also don't understand posting on Facebook. Exactly what are they looking for when they do that?

To you Brokenheart2 the awesome quilt maker. I also am heavy into volunteering and taking classes. I love it. I love meeting new people and learning a new skill. Right now I am taking sewing lessons. The daughter of the seamstress is finally learning how to do it. I will be thinking of you today Brokenheart2.

Good for you momof2, but you might want to block his number as well. Trust me some of these messages from guys can be stressful ex. my crazy contractor. Arneal my son bought me a diffusor for Mother's Day. I have been using a lot of lavender and peppermint. I don't have any frankincense but I think that is a great idea. I have frankincense wax cubes for those warmer thingamingers. Have you tried the oil on your skin?

So sorry momof2obs, I hope you are doing alright. Last week I was at the top of my stress game because of a contractor that I am suing. The last straw was a text message from him.The message was so bizarre and because if was so strange I didn't feel safe. Called some friends and my lawyer and they calmed me down yesterday. My back has been in so much pain from the stress went and had a massage, still in pain but hopefully it gets better. Talked to my neighbors to keep a look out on my property. Then I called "Tommy" texter and explained the situation. The guy was amazing. Actually felt genuine concern. Once I get my own head on straight I hope we go out again. Guess I was wrong about oversharing too soon.